


Send in the Clones

by dvs



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Clones, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-02-07
Updated: 2010-02-07
Packaged: 2017-10-07 02:24:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 47,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/60385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dvs/pseuds/dvs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack's clone adjusts to being the other guy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Send in the Clones

**Author's Note:**

> Post _Fragile Balance_.

This morning I spent half an hour staring into the mirror. I kept expecting the reflection to change. I kept waiting for wrinkles and gray/white hair. Instead I have this fifteen-year-old-kid staring back at me real confused.

And with a zit the size of a planet on his chin.

You'd think it was a blessing right? Being young again, that's like _the_ dream, right? You get to do everything over, only this time your knees aren't shot and your hair's not gray. Sweet, right? Wrong. _So_ wrong.

First of all, no beer. Unless I get a fake ID. Okay, maybe I could work around that one. Second, curfew. Hammond is having me watched to make sure I'm home on time. He doesn't know I know he's having me watched. He's obviously forgotten this fifteen-year-old has experience in black ops and can see a guy tailing him from a mile off. Nevertheless, curfew? Hello? Colonel Jack O'Neill here, saved the planet a couple of times?

I guess I can stretch the curfew. It's not like they can do much about it really. Besides drag my ass back to the base and make sure I don't see the light of day until I'm eighteen.

Right.

At least I have my own place. How many fifteen-year-olds have their own place? Come to think of it, when I was fifteen, I wanted my own place so I could stay out late and drink beer.

Right.

When I was fifteen I was juggling at least three different girlfriends. Now I lust after the teachers and break into spots if a girl even talks to me.

I'm not a kid. I know stuff. I've seen things those kids at school will never see. I saved the goddamn world. I'm not supposed to be doing homework or studying for my physics test on Monday. It's not fair. It is _so_ not fair.

He gets to have everything. My home, my cabin, my job, my friends. My life. I guess I know how the robot me felt now. No wonder he was pissed off. He got fucked. Just like I got fucked.

I spent Saturday afternoon sitting around feeling sorry for myself. Actually, I got invited out to the movies by some shy girl called Stacy. I muttered some pitiful little excuse and ran away before I could feel like a great big pervert.

Oh and get this. They all think I'm a geek.

Hey, it's not like I enjoy studying, I just don't have much else going on right now and I'll be damned if I try to lose my virginity a second time. It was bad enough the first time. Back seat of my car, Amanda King. She was a cheerleader and I was a horny little devil. We were seventeen. We broke up a week later.

Then I met Sara. She was quiet, but confident. She made me forget what I was talking about every time I spoke to her. Then one day she laughed and said she thought I was 'real cute' and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I turned to my best pal Dave and said, 'Did she just break up with me?' and he looked back and replied, 'I'm not sure.'

We were great together. Everything we did together was great.

So... I spent my Saturday afternoon thinking about stuff I'm supposed to pretend never happened to me. Sure, that's easy.

That's when I got the first visitor. The ghost of Christmas present. Cassandra Frasier.

"Hi," I said frowning when she just brushed past me, into the loft, while I was left standing there still looking into the hallway.

"Hey. I brought my favorite Playstation games," she said taking off her jacket and throwing it on the couch. I followed her and picked up the jacket, hanging it up.

"Wow, cool place," Cassie said looking around at the minimally decorated loft. She then turned to me and grinned. "So. Like, this must be totally freaky. I mean, you're you, but you're not."

"Yeah," I said, slowly. "Cassie, does your mom know you're here?"

"Sure. She sent me. Said it would be good for you to be around someone your own age."

I just stared at the kid. "You want a drink?"

"Sure? Can I have a beer?"

I raised an eyebrow at the young eager lady in front of me. "_I_ can't have a beer."

She looked confused. "Really? Why not?"

Finally, I thought, someone gets it. "Well, apparently I'm not old enough," I said walking over to the little kitchen enclosure. Cassie sat down at the breakfast bar and I got two cans of Coke from the fridge.

"But you're like, totally old enough," she said opening her can.

"Okay. See, you get it, but they don't," I said waving a hand.

Cassie looked at me then, all sympathetic. She's obviously got her mother's bedside manner. "So, this must really suck."

I nodded. "Pretty much."

"Do you feel like Jack? I mean, like you're old?"

You gotta hand it to her, she doesn't pull any punches. "Uh... no. I don't feel... old. I just... remember stuff. Stuff I did... feel like I did."

She shrugged. "Yeah, but that stuff never happened to you."

"Well, I remember it happening to me. I remember when we brought you to Earth. And I remember when I thought we were all gonna blow up with you too."

She smiled. "I know. But, you're kind of like a videotape. You were empty, then someone made you a copy of someone else. But it doesn't mean you have to stay a copy. You can just tape over yourself."

She just shrugged and said this like it's as easy as licking a stamp. I stared at her, mulling over her little teenaged epiphany.

It was all very true and sickeningly sensible. I'm not him am I? I'm just a copy. They're not my memories. I'm not old enough to have done any of that stuff. I haven't done anything yet. I stood there and thought about this, while she got up and went over to the ice hockey table.

"Cool. Wanna play?" She asked looking up from the Plexiglas dome she was leaning all over.

"Sure," I said walking over and taking a place on the opposite side. It occurred to me then, that Carter and Frasier were in no way above sending Cassie over to drive home the message.

"Your mom tell you to say all that stuff?" I said looking at Cassie from across the dome.

She gave a sharp nod. "Yep."

"Carter have anything to do with this?"

"Yep."

"They're outside aren't they?"

"Yep. You mad?"

"Nope."

"Are you gonna get mad?"

"Nope."

"You wanna invite them in?"

"Nope." I grinned at Cassie. "Wanna play some ice hockey?"

 

 

## 

*

 

Cassie and I hung out for a few hours. After a while she called Frasier and whispered, 'He's in a pretty bad mood. I think if you came up he'd be really mad.' Then we used my telescope to watch Carter and Frasier freezing their asses off waiting in the car. That was fun.

Then Cassie left and it was just me and the big barely furnished 'cosy' loft. Not that I mind how empty it is. A lot of room to roller-blade, even if it does scuff the boards. Hammond happened to come over once, while I was roller-blading with a ball and hockey stick. He had to open the door just as I hit the tennis ball. Got him square in the head. Of course, it wasn't like he could fire me.

"Sorry, George," I said skating past him. Should have seen his face. Priceless.

It's weird though. One minute I'm Colonel Jack O'Neill trapped inside the body of a fifteen-year-old. And the next minute I'm using the loft as a basketball court, having fun, like I really am fifteen. Like my body's fooling my brain. It's like being two different people. It's nuts. Totally nuts.

 

 

## 

*

 

Saturday evening and like every teenaged boy in the land I was sitting in front of the TV watching the History Channel and a documentary on _Egypt, the Old Kingdom_. Man, did they have it wrong or what? Daniel would have torn them a new one.

The show got depressing pretty quick so I changed the channel. _The Simpsons_ marathon. I thought of the jerk that had my life and switched the TV off altogether.

I was heading back to the kitchen counter where my chemistry homework was sitting in a beaker and a test tube when there was a knock at the door. The ghost of Christmas past.

And behind door number one was Dr. Daniel Jackson. He was wearing blue jeans, a black sweater and brown suede jacket. I was wearing a big yellow hockey shirt and sweats and looked very fifteen. The situation was about to suck at a whole new level.

"What are you doing here?" I blurted out like a dork.

"Uh... well, I'm not really sure," he said looking at the Coke can in my hand. Third one that day actually. By the time I'm sixteen I don't think I'll have any teeth left.

"Got another one of those?" Daniel nodded at the can.

I looked at the can and nodded. "Sure."

Daniel followed me in and I knew he was just leeching in the visuals.

"Like what you've done with the place," he said and I knew he was smiling.

"Thanks. I get inspiration from the sports section," I said getting a can from the fridge and throwing it at Daniel. A nasty little vicious part of me wanted it to hit Daniel and knock him out cold.

Daniel caught it and settled it on the counter as he looked at the basketball hoop and board that had been rigged to a support beam. I knew he wouldn't touch that drink. He looked back at the counter and picked up the beaker.

"What's all this?"

"Homework," I said taking a gulp of Coke that made my gums throb.

Daniel smiled. Yes, it was all so amusing. Jack O'Neill doing chemistry homework. I didn't smile back. I didn't think it was so funny. Daniel's face turned serious.

"So... how's it...?"

"Where is he?" I asked walking out from behind the counter and picking up the basketball from the floor. Daniel slowly turned to watch me as I bounced the ball and sunk a basket.

"He's parking the car. Told him to give me a minute," Daniel said, quietly observing me.

"Yeah? What for?" I sunk another basket.

"I dunno. I thought we could talk."

"Talk? Sure. Go ahead, talk," I said aiming to throw.

Daniel's hands took the ball away as he stepped in front of me.

"What? Wanna play?" I asked quietly. The man's face was covered in sheer terror. "I meant... basketball," I said smoothly.

Daniel nodded, mouth clamped shut momentarily. "I know what you meant, Jack."

I grabbed the ball from him and threw it over his head, straight through the middle of the hoop. Talk about aim. Stepping around him, I picked up the ball and bounced it on the spot.

"I don't want you to call me that. It's not my name."

Daniel was frowning. "It's not?"

"No. I'm not Jack. I'm not a colonel in the United States Airforce. I was never married. I didn't have a son who shot himself with my gun. Hell, I didn't even have a gun. And I am definitely, positively not fucking you. So, not Jack."

Daniel flinched. It made me absurdly happy. "Don't talk like that," he said.

"Don't worry. Place is clean. I checked for bugs."

"I still don't want you to talk like that."

"Why? You think fifteen-year-old boys don't say fuck?"

Daniel sighed and looked beat. I tried to imagine what it was like for him. What would I have done if a fifteen-year-old Daniel clone had shown up? I know I wouldn't want him to be alone. Though if anyone could handle being alone, it was probably Daniel. Pick any age.

He stood there looking at me like I was a dog that needed to be put down and had no idea. I almost felt sorry for him.

I nodded towards the door. "Go home, Daniel."

Daniel closed his eyes and smiled. There was a little laugh, like he was totally amazed by something.

"What the hell's so funny?"

He looked away and the smile slowly faded. He looked sorry, like this was all his fault. Trust Daniel to get fucked up about something he had nothing to do with.

"You're you, but... I just... I can't believe it... " Daniel said trailing off hopelessly. "It's just weird."

"This from the guy who spent a year as a light bulb," I quipped.

Daniel stepped towards me and I stepped away. Don't ask me why, but I just couldn't stand the thought of being so close to him.

"I just... need to know if you're okay."

"Never better," I said flatly. "New place. New hair. New set of wheels," I added lifting my knee slightly and making Daniel smile.

Daniel opened his mouth to say something else, but dickhead chose to walk in at that moment.

I made a point of looking _him_ up and down in his blue jeans and blue sweater under the brown leather jacket. Maybe this time around I can get some fashion sense.

"Hey," he said.

"Hey," I said.

"Love what you've done with the place," he said with a grin, appreciating the beauty of the surroundings. Well, I guess if anyone could it would be him.

He walked over to the counter and took a brief second to look at the experiment. "Hope you're not thinking of blowing anything up."

I gave the man who had stolen my life a hard, resentful stare. "Not yet."

And there we were. The three musketeers standing around staring at each other. Me, Moron and Daniel. I watched them flash their little secret eye messages to each other. Moron's was asking how I was and Daniel was replying that I could be better.

"So," he said.

"So?" I asked.

"So..." Daniel said as he raised his eyebrows and I knew that meant he was about to say something stupid to alleviate the tension. "Here we are."

What did I tell you?

"Is there a reason you're both here or do you have nothing better to do on a Saturday?" I finally asked after they had both fallen silent again.

"Hey, we just wanna make sure you're okay," Mr. I'm Not A Clone said pointing at me like I'd done something wrong. God, I just wanted to knock his lights out.

"Well, you should know better than anyone else. I can take care of myself," I said.

He looked back at the experiment. "That's what I'm worried about," he muttered. That guy thinks he's such a smartass.

"Look," he said as he stuck his hand out to illustrate whatever lame point he was about to make. "Daniel says we gotta talk."

"Jack," Daniel said, throwing a look of warning at him.

"What? It was your idea!"

"What Jack's trying to say is, we were both worried about you."

He nodded. "What he said."

"Well don't," I said, starting to get pissed off. "I'm fine. Just peachy."

He scowled.

"Look, Jack, General Hammond told us you've requested to be moved from here," Daniel said, finally getting to the point.

I turned away and threw the ball, watched it skim the ring and then fall off the edge. "Yep. So?"

"Why?"

"Why? What do you mean why? Isn't it obvious?"

"No. It's why we're here. I was hoping you'd tell us why," Daniel said from behind me.

I lined up a shot and the ball was grabbed from over my head. I turned and stared at _him_. That... thing.

"Gimme that back," I snapped.

"Come and get it," he said, stepping back and holding it out of reach.

"Jack..." Daniel began.

"Keep out of this Daniel!" we both barked at him at the same time.

Daniel held his hands up and stepped back as I glared at Colonel I Get To Be Me. "Give it back."

"What's going on with you? A week ago everything was okay, you were settling down. Now you want to move to another state?"

I gave up going for the ball and just glared. "Okay? Everything was okay? What the fuck would you know?"

He was annoyed. "You wanna tone it down some?"

This pissed me off even more. "No! No, I will not tone it the fuck down! Don't you get it? I'm not fifteen! I've done this! I had a life and now I don't. I don't get to be me anymore, because I'm the copy. I'm the spare. I don't get to have my house. I don't get to have my job. I don't get to have my friends." I looked over at Daniel who looked uncomfortable and unhappy. "I don't get to have my life," I mumbled. "Because it was never mine. Maybe I'm not even really here."

Feeling wiped out, I went and sat down at the counter, flicking my finger against the beaker.

"I don't want to be here. I told myself it would be easy. I'd do the whole school thing right this time, but I've got all these memories that are telling me something else. Telling me I'm supposed to have a different life here, and I don't. I've never even been here before. Those memories aren't mine. So maybe I should go somewhere else. Make new ones."

They were both quiet and I knew they were exchanging their stupid looks again. Then he... Jack, sat down next to me.

"You wanted to live. Don't you think you should try making the most of it? Not a lot of people get a second chance. That's what you've got. And no, those memories aren't really yours, but look at it this way, you really _want_ them to be yours?"

I looked at Jack and knew exactly what he was talking about. He was right. I didn't need the memory of walking into Charlie's room and finding him dead. I didn't want that memory to belong to me. It wasn't mine. It was a bad dream and I could make it fade away.

"You're fifteen. You've got a whole life in front of you. You're young, you've got great hair, a great place and a new set of wheels," Jack said with a shrug. "Make the most of it."

Daniel walked around to the other side of the counter. "And you've got people who want you here. People who care about you. Don't forget that part," Daniel said, meaning it.

"What he said." Jack added, _so_ not meaning it. I'm pretty sure he didn't want me around as much as I didn't want him around. Especially around Daniel.

"And besides," Jack said as he gave me a pat on the back, "Carter and Frasier think you're really cute. I can only imagine how that might be to your benefit."

I laughed. I had to. The situation was so stupid. Stupid Asgard stalkers with their stupid technology. I'll probably find out they gave me a good rectal probing too when I'm in therapy ten years from now.

I turned to Jack. "Hey, I thought we weren't going to stay in touch."

Jack sighed and nodded. "No, we weren't. I guess I'm a little curious as to how I might have... how you might turn out."

I nodded back with understanding. "Daniel made you, didn't he?"

Jack stared at me, mulling it over. "Pretty much."

Daniel and Jack exchanged their stupid looks. They were probably waiting for some big emotional breakdown.

"Was there something else?" I asked raising my eyebrows. "Only, I gotta finish this. I figure this way I've got the whole of tomorrow free to go down to the ice rink. Show those kids how it's really done."

Daniel laughed. I think he was relieved that I wasn't sitting around preparing to eat a bullet.

They both exchanged more stupid glances. Why don't they just wear a sign that says, 'We're fucking like rabbits'?

Jack got up and grinned. Yeah, he was real amused. Like the man had never done homework. I walked them both to the door.

Jack stepped outside into the hall and gave me a sloppy salute. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"What? Like homework? Cleaning?"

"Yadda," Jack replied as he rolled his eyes and disappeared down the hallway.

Daniel stepped into the doorway. I really hated him. Hated them both.

"Well, take care of yourself. You know you can call us if you need anything."

"Which I won't, because it's too weird," I quickly said, feeling all weird and needy. You know those movies where all the women are wearing dresses that look like they have umbrellas underneath them and some guy is always being a jerk and the woman grabs his pant leg and says, 'Don't leave! Don't leave!’? Well, I had this sudden urge to grab Daniel and do the same.

"It's not fair you know," I said.

Daniel smiled. "What?"

"He gets to have you. It's not fair."

"I'm sorry."

I smiled then and it made Daniel laugh. "What?"

"Nothin'."

"No. What is it?"

"Oh, I was just thinking," I said, stepping towards Daniel so we were almost illegally close. Give the man credit, he did not back away. Instead he just stared, ice cool.

"What were you thinking?"

"I was thinking. In ten years time, you might want to look me up. Trade in for a faster model."

Daniel started to laugh.

"You're laughing now," I said, slowly pushing his glasses up his nose. "But mark my words, you'll think about it."

Daniel nodded with an amused smile. Then he leaned forward and my heart began to pound because I thought he was going to kiss me. _So_ illegal and _so_ okay by me. And he did. He kissed me. A very brief touch of his lips to my forehead. I wanted to hit him.

He pulled back smiling, his eyes on something behind me. "Jack told me you'd say that."

Still smiling, Daniel stepped outside and disappeared, leaving me standing there in my stupid oversized hockey shirt.

I watched Daniel leave, knowing him and Jack would be inside each other's pants the minute they arrived home. I closed the door with a sigh and walked back towards my new life. The life of a fifteen-year-old flyboy living on his own with black ops training and issues of puberty. I picked up the basketball and took a run up to the hoop, sending the ball up and watching it fall dead center of the hoop.

"He shoots, he scores!! And the crowd, goes wild!"

The ball rolled back on the floor, hitting my feet and rolling away again. I stood there and stared at it. It's funny how you think about your mom at the weirdest moments.

 

## 

*

 

I was having that weird dream again. It wasn't actually my dream. This was something that the 'real' Jack O'Neill dreamt about all the time. It was, in fact, one of his dreams.

I wake up. I shower. I dress. I drive to work. I change into BDUs. I get some coffee. I greet people. I go to a briefing where Teal'c, Carter and Daniel are already there. Hammond sits down. Carter plays the tape and everyone gets an eyeful of me and Daniel doing bad, bad things. Dirty, sweaty, bad things.

"Goddamn!" Hammond yells out. At which point I wake up red faced.

I sat there trying to get my breath back, sweating like a pig (which is _so_ wrong by the way, because apparently pigs don't sweat!).

"Okay, that was weird."

I turned the lamp on and finished off a half a can of Coke I'd left on the bedside table earlier on.

And that's when I was visited by the ghost of Christmas future.

There was a bright blue flash at the bottom of my bed and there stood Mr. Oh Look What A Big Ship I've Got.

"Thor!" I said leaping out of bed without a thought for the fact that the 'bedroom' was a just a raised section of the loft. Thor beamed out of my way and I fell off the bed and rolled down the stairs into the 'living room', still wrapped up in the bedsheets.

Thor reappeared at a safe distance. "O'Neill. You seem agitated."

I disentangled myself from the sheets and threw them aside. "Agitated? Of course I'm agitated. Look at me! I oughta kick your little gray ass for what you've done to me!"

Thor raised his hairless eyebrow. "It is most unbecoming to take this tone with one elder than you. You must restrain your youthful anger."

I stared open-mouthed. Then I jumped for him, my hands ready to wrap around that little neck of his. "You little son of a bitch! I'm gonna kill you!"

Thor disappeared and I fell on the floor, sliding across it and stopping near the hockey table.

Thor reappeared on the steps that I'd fallen on. When he spoke his tone was more apologetic. "Perhaps I was at fault this time. However your threat to attack my small gray posterior is of considerable worry."

I sloppily turned over and sat up to glare at him. Somewhere out there Jack was having happy hour with Daniel Jackson while I was sitting around talking to a naked alien that didn't seem to have any noticeable genitalia. Hey, when you're fifteen, you notice stuff like that.

Actually, it made the need for cloning make a whole lot more sense.

"Why are you here?" I said getting up off the floor, appreciating how the knees didn't creak.

"I have something of great importance to tell you."

"If it's a request to help you rid the galaxy of bugs, you've got the wrong O'Neill. You're looking for a guy with gray hair and a permanently attached archaeologist."

Thor tilted his head, his big eyes freaking me out. "I sense you are upset O'Neill."

"Yeah, a little," I said, whipping up as much sarcasm as possible as I got up and switched on a light on the way to the kitchen.

I opened the fridge and took out a carton of chocolate milk. "Want some?" I said showing it to Thor. Thor shook his head. I drank down half of what was in there and put it back. Yeah, living the dream.

"So. What do you want?"

"It is difficult to say."

I smiled, knowing what kind of horror this harmless-looking alien could unleash. "Oh, this gonna be good. Come on, spit it out, Thor."

"O'Neill, you are my friend."

"Yeah? You coulda fooled me. And besides, I'm the wrong O'Neill, remember? Your friend is a few inches taller."

"You must accompany me. There is a problem of great..."

"Problem? Forget about it. You're not beaming me up anywhere," I said heading back to my bed.

"It is on board the new and most impressive Asgard ship."

"Let me get my pants."

 

## 

*

 

We beamed directly into a typical Asgard corridor. Nothing too impressive here.

"Hey, I thought you said this was the most impressive Asgard ship," I said looking at Thor. Thor stared back blankly.

"I am afraid I had to employ some levity to bring you here."

I closed my eyes as I shook my head. "You know, I'm beginning to see you folk in a whole new light."

Thor walked on ahead as I followed, only just resisting the urge to kick him in the butt.

"You must understand, O'Neill, that what I am about to show you has only come to my attention now. I myself am shocked by the severity of this situation and the fact that it has been hidden so well from me."

"You're not filling me with confidence here."

We stopped at the end of the corridor in front of what looked like a wall. Thor looked up at me with his weird bug eyes and blinked slowly. I raised my eyebrows at him, hoping he would get this over with quick. I never did finish that experiment and wanted to make the most of my Sunday morning. What? Gimme a break, I'm fifteen.

Thor put his hand out and one of those glowing stones appeared. He waved it over the wall and the whole thing just slid up. We stepped inside and Thor walked on ahead and up some steps. He went to stand in front of a glass railing. I joined him and looked over.

It was an odd sight to say the least. Beneath us was a huge room filled with people. By which I mean people people and not alien people. Oh and another thing. They were all teenagers. They were milling around talking to each other and looking a little lost. Gee, I wonder why.

"Okay, you're gonna have to take it slow, because I can be a little dense sometimes. They're all human?"

"Yes."

"Clones?"

"Yes."

"Okay, here's a question. Gah?"

"I can see how this must look bad."

"No. Bad is a fly in my soup. This, is way off past bad and into a whole new bug infested galaxy. Thor, why do you have a ship full of teenaged clones? I mean, I thought what happened to me was a mistake."

Thor sighed and I just knew this was going to be something special.

"It seems Loki was most displeased with the Asgard council's decision to send him into rehabilitation for his insane actions. We felt he had issues that could be resolved through therapy. It seems his closest friends decided to free him from the institution where he was recovering. A search was launched, but they were most devious and successful in remaining hidden. Some hours ago, this Asgard ship was left in the orbit of one the homeworlds with a message from Loki conveying his interest in how I will resolve this matter. It seems that after cloning O'Neill and seeing the quandry your friends were left in at having a younger copy amused Loki to a huge extent. He knows these copies will be of no use to your people and the diplomatic disaster it will create. If I am unable to contain this situation, it could be most embarrassing. There are rumors the council is looking for any excuse to bring back public whipping."

I closed my eyes and held my hand up, stopping Thor from going on. "Let me get this straight, Mr. Supreme Commander Of The Asgard Fleet. You punished Lassie by sending him to a nut house. His buddies managed to spring him and they went on a cloning spree and made teenaged clones on purpose as their version of leaving flaming poop on your porch and now they're waiting for you to try and contain the fire and put your foot in it?"

Thor gave me his patented, zoned out stare. "Assuming there are no follow up questions... yes."

"You're telling me Loki did this and you had no idea? There's gotta be about two hundred people down there! How the hell do you hide two hundred clones?"

"With great ingenuity."

"Well, of course you're going to say that," I said narrowing my eyes at Thor. "Thor? Buddy? You've gotta tell your people, they cannot be coming to Earth and abducting people to drill holes in their teeth, look in their brains or poke things up their asses."

"We do none of those things, O'Neill," Thor said, his eyes widening slightly. Please. I just looked at him.

"Anymore," he added after a moment.

"Sure," I said looking back down into the hall. "What I don't understand is, why tell me?"

"My intention was to speak with the other O'Neill, but it seems he was otherwise engaged."

I rolled my eyes. No guessing what exactly he was engaged in. Having someone's dick up your ass can considerably interfere with you trying to have a conversation with someone. I should know.

"Hey, not my problem. I am no longer a member of the SGC. You need to talk to the other guy. I can't help you here."

"I have brought you here for a specific reason. You will see." He looked away from me for a moment and spoke. "Send in the clones."

"I hope you know that's really clichéd," I said as he turned back to face me.

I have to admit, on some level, I was enjoying this. It was like being me again. Not Jonathan O'Neill, school-kid, but Colonel Jack O'Neill.

Further down from where we stood, a door slid open and four teenagers walked in. We watched them head down towards us. On account of the fact that one of them was black, about three inches taller than all of us and had a grim expression that included a raised eyebrow, pretty much told me I was looking at the rest of SG-1 and a fourth kid I didn't recognise.

They were all dressed neatly in black and it made me think of the robots again. I remembered how I looked at the other me and totally did not accept him as Jack O'Neill. Because I was there first. What an asshole.

So I looked at the kids while trying not to smile. Carter still had the same short blonde hair, a little longer around the ears though. She looked slightly like Cassie. Daniel also had the same hair. Same as Carter's that is. Floppy and long around the ears. He was also wearing his glasses and oddly enough, he still looked like Daniel. Only smaller. In fact he looked the way he had when he rejoined the programme. Teal'c looked like Ry'ac, complete with full head of hair. The fourth kid though. I couldn't place him. He had red hair and blue eyes and was a scrawny little fella. I stared at him trying to figure it out.

Then it hit me. The reason Thor had brought me here. "They don't know, do they?"

Thor didn't reply. He just stayed blank.

"What about the kids down below?"

"They are also unaware as to what has taken place. I was hoping you would explain. They will listen to you. It seems humans of this age are very hard to control. They continue to point out our lack of genitalia and clothing. They have quite willingly forgotten their mental ages are those of adults."

"Why would they listen to me?"

"They are members of the SGC," Thor said slowly.

"How many?"

Again, silence. I swear Thor was actually trying to look away.

"Thor?"

"They are all of the SGC."

Okay, as you might imagine, that took a while for me to process. "Excuse me?"

"They are all members of the SGC," Thor said matter-of-factly.

"I'm sorry. I'm not getting this. Are you trying to tell me you cloned the SGC?"

"Not I, O'Neill." Oh sure, as if _that_ makes a difference!

We both looked at each other. If I'd moved one second quicker, I would have had my hands around his neck. As it happened, he beamed out and I was lying flat on the floor. I punched the floor in frustration and slowly got up as the rest of my team and the scrawny kid arrived.

"Uh... hey," Daniel said pushing back his hair.

"If you tell me you have no idea who I am, I'm gonna be annoyed. Really, I am," I said pointing at Daniel.

"Sir?" Carter's eyes widened.

"Yep. Well, the condensed version anyway. Hey, Teal'c, looking good."

Teal'c gave me a look that said if I spoke to him again, I'd be singing soprano. "Indeed," he said with great restraint.

"Okay. Carter, Daniel and Teal'c, I got," I said pointing at each in turn. "You, I don't know," I said pointing at the scrawny kid who'd been listening quietly.

"Jack... that's General Hammond," Daniel said carefully. Carter made a face that said she was trying very hard not to smile.

I looked at the little guy. "General?"

The kid sighed and his whole face fell. That's when I saw a hint of George in there. "Yes, Colonel. It's me."

"You look... different, Sir," I said.

Hammond nodded. "I know Colonel. I had noticed. What I need to know is what's going on here and why the SGC has been turned into teenagers."

"And why they haven't turned us back into us," Daniel asked.

I frowned at the questions, but it occurred to me the Asgard weren't beyond memory tampering. "I'm guessing you don't remember me turning up at the SGC last week, looking like this."

Hammond looked confused. "I think I'd remember something like that, Colonel."

Carter stepped forward and frowned at me. "Sir, where have you been all this time?"

"Yeah..." Right.

"Colonel?" Hammond pressed.

"I think you all need to sit down," I said calmly. Then I saw the look on Teal'c's face and took a safe step back.

 

## 

*

 

To say it had gone spectacularly bad would be an understatement. All the Asgard in the main room had to vanish because a horde of teenagers pretty much wanted to kill them. Carter and Frasier went off in a little corner to console each other. Teal'c stood in one place and looked real scary while General Hammond, being the professional that he is, tried to regain some control over the situation. He also promised he would find the Asgard responsible and kick his ass all the way to Cheyenne. Go George!

As for me and Daniel, we took a little walk down a corridor.

"So, you have your own place?"

"Yeah."

"What's it like?"

"Pretty cool", I shrugged.

"And you live on your own?"

"Yep."

"What's school like?"

"It's okay, I guess."

"You like it?"

"Sure. I know more this time around."

"What about Jack? How's he about this?"

"Pretty weirded out," I said as we came up to a large window through which planet Earth was doing the usual glowy blue thing. Cool.

"What about me? I mean, the other me," Daniel said watching me closely for a reaction.

I sighed. Never a break. I figured now that Daniel was all un-ascended and alive again, we could start over. Stop bitching about the old stuff and just get over the crap we'd managed to build up between us. And now we were back to square one. Because, I swear, looking at Daniel standing there, looking the way he did... it was confusing as hell. There was nothing. Not a spark. Not a sting. Nothing.

Earlier on when Daniel had come over to my place, wearing those jeans and looking like Daniel, I could've jumped his bones. Now I was looking at Daniel, floppy haired and even more dorky than the first time I'd met him and I was just... confused.

"It's weird, isn't it?" Daniel said when I didn't answer his question.

"Pretty fucked up."

"You don't look like you," Daniel said looking up at my hair.

"You uh... you look," I reached out to push up his glasses, but then I stopped. "Like you. Only, different."

Daniel laughed. He turned to face the window and we both stared at Earth. The planet we'd all saved so many times.

"Wow," Daniel said.

"Totally," I said nodding. "Hey, There's my house."

 

## 

*

 

Another thing I didn't know about the Asgard was exactly how sophisticated their surveillance is. The reason they didn't spring Jack was because they could see how he was otherwise engaged in Technicolor and Dolby prologic. How did I know this?

Me, Daniel, Carter, Teal'c and Hammond were with Thor in his special command centre. He was going to patch us through to the SGC and talk to Hammond... bald Hammond. Before that though, we watched SG-1 having a briefing. The focus of the briefing was yours truly and the fact that I'd disappeared from my place in the middle of the night without anyone having noticed.

That's when I made an appearance. Or rather that's when the briefing room seemed to appear around me.

"Jack," Daniel was the first to speak and I knew it had mostly to do with the fact that everyone was still weird about calling me that.

"Daniel," I nodded. "General."

Hammond nodded. "You had us worried, Jack. I'm assuming you're with the Asgard. Any particular reason why?"

"Uh, yeah. You're all not going to be too thrilled about this, Sir. I'm gonna have Thor beam us down there to explain."

"Us?" Carter said frowning.

She was still frowning at the spot where my hologram had been when Thor beamed us all down at the opposite end of the room.

Everyone got up out of their seats and stared open-mouthed.

"Oh my god," Daniel said staring at his clone.

"This is most strange," Teal'c said looking at his.

"Wha..." Carter froze.

"What in gods name is going on?" Hammond said looking at his younger self.

Jack stared open mouthed. "Holy crap."

 

## 

*

So picture the scene. Hammond Hammond at one end of the table and scrawny Hammond at the other. They're both sitting there in the exact same position, like a weird fucked up mirror image.

I'm sitting opposite Jack. Daniel's in front of Daniel, Carter opposite Carter and Teal'c in front of a very confused looking Jaffa.

"The whole SGC?" Daniel says with a raise of eyebrows.

"Yep. They're all up there."

Carter shakes her head. "How could Thor let this happen?"

"With great ingenuity apparently," I say.

"The concern is," scrawny Hammond speaks and everyone stares at him, "what are we going to do now? I don't think the government's going to relocate over two hundred clones."

Hammond Hammond nods as if this was exactly what he was about to say.

"The General's right," I say. "If you go to the Joint Chiefs, they're going to suggest a nice little enclosure where we can all live happily ever after under a microscope. You're talking about a lot of people with knowledge and experience being held back because we happened to get caught up in some alien experiment."

"I understand what you're saying, Colonel, but I can't see how we're possibly going to resolve this situation," General Hammond says.

It shuts me up for a moment, because he said 'Colonel' and he wasn't talking to the guy sitting opposite me. For some reason, this means a hell of a lot to me. It's like they finally figured it out. I'm still here. Way to go George.

"Well, we've been thinking about that, sir," Carter spoke up, little Carter that is. Big Carter was pretty preoccupied with grinning at how darned cute we all looked. "A third site. Thor said he'd help us find a safe site to set up base. It'll be like the beta site, only it'll be protected by the Asgard. They've even offered to help with building a base."

Jack looked slightly surprised. "They have?"

"Of course they have," I said. "This is all their fault remember?"

"In a few years, Sir, we'll be a prepared reserve force for the SGC," Carter continued.

"So, a mini-SGC?" Daniel said, restraining himself from smiling. The rest of his team avoided our eyes and similarly tried not to smile. Me and my team glared.

I looked at General Hammond, who didn't seem to see the funny side as much as his flagship team. "Carter's right, Sir. Only we'll be younger. Faster. Stronger," I said and then look at Daniel with an eyebrow raise. Grown up perfect ass Daniel, that is. Jack rolled his eyes and shook his head. Daniel tried not to laugh.

"In the mean time," Daniel said, that's little Daniel, "It might be a good idea if the clones met their counterparts. It might help to make a little sense of this."

Hammond looked at his scrawny self and sighed deeply. "I think that might be a good idea, Dr. Jackson."

 

## 

*

 

People were mingling all over the base, but mostly in the commissary. It was so weird. The place was filled with angry teenagers and awkward grownups. I could see both Teal'cs at the other side of the room, engaged in quiet and focused conversation. The Carters were taking turns to talk very fast while looking simultaneously amazed. I wasn't standing with Jack. I was with Daniel; grown up, hotty Daniel. Clone Daniel was with gray Jack.

Me and Daniel were watching both from the other side of the commissary. Jack had this indulgent look as he was nodding and listening to Daniel talk.

"What do you think they're talking about?" Daniel asked, an amused smile on his face.

I took a bite out of my chocolate muffin. "Daniel's probably offering himself up."

"I would never do that. Shameless is your thing," Daniel said grinning at me.

I grinned back and finished off the muffin.

"Where do you put all that food?" Daniel said nodding to the muffin remains.

"I'm a growing boy," I said with a shrug.

I watched as Jack said something to the other Daniel and headed back towards us. Without any prompting, I headed towards Daniel.

"So, whatcha talk about?"

Daniel sighed and turned his back towards Jack and the hotass Daniel. "I have no idea. I just babbled on and on and Jack just listened. I don't know exactly what I was expecting. I mean, he's hardly going to notice me looking like this. I mean look at me. I've returned to the epicentre of my geekdom."

"Yeah. But that's only because you use words like 'epicenter' and 'geekdom'. Quit your worrying. Look at it this way, you've got no theories to prove, no languages to learn and none of the obstacles you had the first time you were this age. Conveniently enough though, you already know all that stuff. Do you realise you are way more clever than Daniel will ever be? We all are. And another bonus is you get to grow up and look like that," I said nodding towards Daniel who was listening to Jack very carefully, Jack leaning in to whisper in his ear over the crowd volume. I don't know why he didn't just stick his tongue down Daniel's ear and make it totally obvious.

"Like what?" Daniel said looking at older Daniel.

"That," I nodded again.

Daniel frowned at me. He didn't get it. Typical.

"Hot, Daniel. You get to look hot," I said slowly. Daniel laughed.

"Oh. Well, I guess it's not all bad. Especially since you get to look like that," Daniel nodded at the mummified version of myself.

"Yeah. But not for a long time," I said grinning like an idiot. "Okay. I gotta go. Gotta mingle. Thor said he might beam in to offer a grovelling apology."

Daniel nodded with a smile. "Okay."

I began to walk away and I felt like Jack O'Neill. I didn't feel like a spare anything. I felt like a somebody because I was back in the SGC. Because I was smack bang in the middle of stuff. I wasn't the same Jack O'Neill. Not the one that was engaged in conversation with Dr. Jackson and looking over at me every five minutes to make sure I wasn't taking advantage of the younger version of his archaeologist. But I was _a_ Jack O'Neill. A version of myself from somewhere back when mistakes hadn't been made and I hadn't lost so much. I was willing to take this for what it was. A new chance. I was more than willing.

"Jack?"

I turned back to Daniel who was awkwardly standing there, a little nervous. No doubt he was still trying to figure it all out. "Yeah?"

"You want to hang out some time?" He said it with a smile that belonged to the older him. A smile filled with mischief.

I smiled back. "Sure," I said with shrug. "I guess that would be okay."

Daniel nodded and pretended to be all laid back. "Okay."

I smiled. I mean, really smiled. Like I haven't in a long time. I gave him a nod and turned to go. "Sweet."

**\- the end - **


	2. A Clonely Existence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's years later and the clones have moved on.

Some mornings I wake up and for a minute I'm sure when I look into the mirror I'm going to see _him_. You know. The other guy. The other me. The original me. I have to take a deep breath before I look in the mirror, because life has not been so bad in these last ten years and if I were to find out this was all just one big dream... I'd be a little pissed.

Deep breath. Deep breath. Come on Jack, you can do it! And...

Phew! I breathe a sigh of relief, because the mug staring back is still twenty-five years old, has great hair, a great smile and the most darn cutest dimples you ever saw on a guy. What? It's true.

I comb my hand through my hair and smile at the fact that not a single one is gray or white. It's a little long around the ears and neck, perhaps a little too tufty on top. But who’s going to complain? It's amazing. I'm so hot I want to run away with myself. Really, I am. No kidding.

So, here's how it is. Lassie, Asgard of mischief apparently, clones the SGC, because it's funny and then Thor being the responsible little gray guy that he is, sets up home for us on a nice little sunny planet called Hawaii. Yes, the name was my idea. But it was way better than Carter's idea; Earth 2. I mean, why don't we just call it Big Round Rock Floating In Space?

So the Asgard built us a nice little SGC to make us feel at home. To be frank, I was happy the minute I saw the sun and sand. It's a long way off from Minnesota where the only sun and sand comes from episodes of Baywatch. However, as George pointed out, establishing a chain of command was going to be weird especially since the whole of the SGC was breaking out into spots and having mood swings. Thor, being the responsible little naked guy that he is, felt that perhaps we could do with more Asgard involvement since they screwed it all up in the first place.

I give you Thor, supreme commander of the Asgard fleet and commander of the SGC-II. George seems more than happy to be his 2IC. Especially since it means less time behind a desk and more inside experimental flying machines a.k.a. deathtraps. The guy's a nut.

SGC-II is a weird place. We never did turn into that elite reserve force. It seems Thor made a little pact with the SGC that we wouldn't keep in touch. So we've grown up here, on Hawaii, under the protection of the Asgard. The Goa'uld don't even know we exist. We're so covert, even I don't know if we're really here. Carter went the military/scientist route, like the original. She says she doesn't like surprises. Teal'c is a man of peace who sings like Barry White. Daniel was a teenaged mutant turtle. No, that's mean.

Daniel is not like the other Daniel and it probably has a lot to do with me. We grew up and kept expecting to turn into _them_ and it just wasn't happening. Daniel went all military. He said he knew the other one had always wanted people to see past the scholar, but never did. I think he's wrong. I know I... I know Jack saw past the scholar. Me? I had enough of the military route the first time around. I figure building stuff is way better than blowing it up. Daniel's up there flying gliders and kicking ass when he can. I have a nice office filled with artifacts and gadgets in progress. Sometimes I like to come out and help the guys kick ass, but most of the time I like to try and figure out where the Ancients are. I'm pretty sure they're around here somewhere.

So that's us. SGC-II; a human/Asgard base filled with clones. And Jell-O. We loved that stuff when we were kids.

## 

*

I was working on my latest gadget when I heard the footsteps entering my office. This was followed by a yawn and a sigh. I did not look up. I knew the old ploy. Daniel liked to come into my office and mess with my stuff until I'd get fed up and agree to go and eat dessert. So I just kept fiddling about with my tools. Er... bad example.

Daniel walked up to the work top and leant across it, picking up a stray wire and joining the ends. I dropped what I was doing.

"What?"

"What?" Daniel asked, looking at me all wide-eyed and innocent.

"I dunno. You came here," I said, waving my hand in confusion. "Shouldn't you and George be testing the new glider?"

"Tomorrow," Daniel said as he pulled up a stool and sat down.

So different from the other Daniel. Never wore glasses to begin with. He happily let the Asgard fix that little problem. His hair hasn't been long since he turned sixteen. Always smart and short with a small upturned tuft at the front. I've asked him to help with translations and stuff, but he always says no. Like if he said yes he'd suddenly turn into the other guy. We're all scared we might turn into the other guys.

Especially George, since he's grown pretty attached to his hair.

"Hey!"

Daniel and I turned to the doorway to see Paul standing there with a large round metallic slab.

"You’ve been cooking again?" I said, nodding to the slab.

Daniel laughed and Paul gave us both an annoyed look. Now there's another guy they wouldn't recognize back on Earth. His hair was dark and shaggy and his goatee was surrounded by what he felt was a sexy amount of stubble. Yeah, whatever. I should've known. Under every prim and proper liaison is a self-absorbed little hippy.

Paul placed the slab on the ground and waved to Daniel to come over. Daniel frowned suspiciously.

"Okay, you _have_ to see this," Paul grabbed Daniel's hand and pulled him over. "I want you to stand on top of that."

Daniel gave the slab a dubious look. "What does it do?"

"Just stand on it," Paul said nodding towards the slab.

Daniel looked at me and not with the greatest amount of enthusiasm.

"Go ahead," I said. "It's probably a vibrator."

Daniel laughed again as Paul clamped his mouth shut.

Once Daniel was standing on the slab, Paul joined me at my side. I'm guessing because you want to be as far away as possible from human explosions. The Asgard still haven't come up with a good detergent. Well, why would they need to?

Paul pulled out a little remote from his pocket. "Okay, Daniel, try not to move."

I looked at Paul. "Foreplay? Don't you think you're spoiling him?"

Paul looked back blankly. "You know what foreplay is?"

I shrugged. "Something do with golf?"

Daniel rolled his eyes this time. "You guys want to cut the comedy act and tell me why I'm standing on this... thing?"

Paul gave an excited smile. "Watch this."

Paul pointed the remote at the slab. A small ring of light lit up on it and the slab slowly began to rise from the floor with Daniel precariously perched on top. Daniel stuck his arms out as the slab began to wobble and climb higher.

"What the hell is that thing?" I asked.

"An anti-gravity unit," Paul said with pride. "Sam and I finally figured it out. Who says reverse engineering doesn't work?"

And this is what I like about karma, fate, kismet, whatever you want to call it. Just as Paul was getting all big-headed about it, there was a small burping sound from the slab and suddenly it just went kaput. It was a few feet off the ground before it fell back and Daniel lurched forwards and fell flat on his face.

Paul stared at Daniel who was lying face down and groaning in pain. I could see him considering jumping over Daniel and running out.

"Wow," I said. "That was cool. Make it do that again."

Paul ignored me and stuffed the remote into his pocket, then helped Daniel off the floor with groveling apologies.

Daniel grimaced as he straightened up. He looked down at the dented slab and then at Paul. "Well… that was fun."

Paul grinned and then leaned forward to give Daniel a brief kiss. I rolled my eyes and turned my back on them, pretending to observe a coffee cup ring on my work top. Hey, what'd'you know? There were two of them. I wonder if I was trying to draw something.

"Maybe I should work on this some more," Paul said and I briefly heard another suck-face noise before Paul began to walk away.

"See you later, Pookie!" I called out after him.

"Fucking asshole," I heard the eloquent mutter from the corridor. Fine, don't be a lady.

Daniel smiled at me as I turned to face him. "Why do you have to piss him off?"

I shrugged. "I don't like his facial hair?"

Daniel raised an eyebrow at the answer and walked off to look at my bookshelves instead. He quietly stood there looking at the names on the spines as he slowly walked along. I watched him as he pulled out a book and flicked through the pages. I slowly crept up behind him and looked over his shoulder.

"Take it," I said quietly, as I leant against his back, my arms resting on his shoulders as my palms braced themselves against the bookshelf.

Daniel shook his head.

"Why not?"

"What's the point? I'm not looking for anything anymore. It's all already been found."

Daniel began to put the book back, but I closed my hand around his and stopped him. "Then find something new."

Daniel pulled his hand away and put the book back. He swiftly moved away from me, ducking under an arm and headed towards the door. Stopping by the doorway, he looked up at me with this odd frown. I swear, for a moment, he looked just like the other guy. All that was missing were the glasses.

He looked around at my office and then me. "Is this your way of being with him?"

I looked at the soft glow of my office, immediately reminiscent of the other Daniel's office. Even the artifacts and books. Why didn't I just call myself Daniel Jackson?

"No," I said quietly. "It's my way of not turning into the other guy."

Daniel looked away at the ground, giving the door frame a small kick with the toe of his boot. "The other guy isn’t so bad."

"No," I said. "But I can't be him. No more than you can be the Daniel Jackson you were cloned from."

Daniel looked up at me like I'd just kicked him in the teeth, because we didn't use that word. There was no such thing as a clone. We were all real and unique. Not copies. Not clones. But I don't believe in lies. I know exactly what we are. I just found a way to be happy. I don't give a fuck. I'm me.

Daniel sighed and gave me a nod before he disappeared from sight. I sat down and thought about the other one. The one I wanted, but couldn't have. I wondered if he was ready for the newer model yet. Because ten years ago, I meant it and now for some reason I was beginning to feel exactly how much I meant it.

## 

*

The life of a clone is complicated. You wake up and you're pretty sure you're you. Only you're not and you don't actually know this. So you run around with your friends, only they're not your friends, and you try to figure out what the hell happened to you, only, you're not you. Are you? You with me?

Then someone figures it out. Hey, guess what buddy, you're not you, you're someone else and for the real kick in the nuts, you get to be much shorter too. Well, just peachy. I found out I was a clone. I wasn't the Coke. I was the fake Cola. I was the diluted orange juice. The ninety-percent fat free twinky. The same, but totally different.

It can screw with a guy's mind. I told myself, cool, I can deal with this. I spent four months in an Iraqi prison with a roach for a roommate. I can deal. Only, I didn't, did I? There was no prison. No mission that went wrong. And it always came back to that one thing. I was the fake. A big fat, albeit incredibly cute, lie. So I tried the school thing. Monday it worked out. Tuesday it sucked. Wednesday it was kind of half and half. Thursday it was okay. Friday it sucked. Saturday I was a kid with no place to go. I ended up staring in the mirror for an hour because I didn't get it. I just didn't get how the guy looking back was me.

Suddenly, it wasn't okay after all. I was going to school, but I wasn't a kid. I remembered everything and I had nothing. And the worst thing? The worst thing was lying in bed at night, feeling that thing. You know, that heat, that itch you get. It's like something's creeping around in your bones and making you all restless. I'd lie there feeling that. Only it was just me and my hand to take care of business, because _he_ got to go home with Daniel. They got to fuck and kiss and love and all that other crap. I got to pretend I wasn't fifteen while I jerked off on my own, pretending it wasn't my hand. Pretending it was Daniel all over me like a tweed suit. I got nothing.

Then Thor beamed me up and voila! A whole new fucked scenario. Sure I was happy. I didn't have to be alone. I didn't have to be the only one. And considering the only other clones were the Asgard, I really, really didn't want to be alone.

My first thought was, _Daniel!_ I had this weird notion that this time it would be better. I didn't have to be the old guy. This time we were starting the race even. I was happy because I thought maybe I hadn't lost out, because I was getting it all back. But, when you're Jack O'Neill, clone or _other_wise, you know the universe is waiting to fuck you in a different position. Doggy style? Why not? I've got new knees, might as well use them for something fun.

Somewhere along the line, we did a whole new set of growing up. It was like we figured we could shirk responsibility while our height tried to catch up with our age. I 'grew' up with Daniel and I kept waiting to see that guy I met all those years ago. That dork who made chicken noises, made offerings of chocolate, jumped in front of an idiot that didn't care if he was going to live or die. I kept waiting for that hair to grow out, those glasses to reappear. But it never happened. Daniel was turning into someone else.

Daniel told me that ascension didn't work out for one big reason. He wanted to do more. The need to kick Goa'uld ass had taken over the need to learn. This is what the clone Daniel told me. He said he had a second chance to be the man the _other_ guy had failed to become and he was going to take it.

Man, I really hated him. I felt like he'd just killed Daniel. The _real_ Daniel. That's when I knew my second chance only went as far as who I wanted to become. This Daniel and I would never be more than friends. We grew up together and had a lot of fun. He waits for me to turn into his Jack. I wait for him to turn into my Daniel. It'll never happen.

As for my second chance to be someone different, I grabbed it with both hands and a fishing net. See, the _other_ guy? He looks like there's nothing going on upstairs. The lights are on, but someone's slipped over in the shower. Right? So wrong. That guy's always ticking. He's always thinking. You know he can snap a guy's neck in two and not even break a sweat? A guy who can do that doesn't always sleep easy. Sometimes you dream about people that took a bullet you fired. Sure it's an order, but it's another added to the body count. Sometimes he dreams about the kid. They're playing and then Charlie just disappears. He looks and looks, can't find him. Then he'll wake up and remember. But he won't cry. He thinks if he cries, that's like saying it wasn't his fault. And he thinks it's his fault. I know because I remember. I don't dream about this stuff anymore. But I'm sure he still does. I don't have to though. Because I'm not really Jack O'Neill, right?

Not easy starting over though. Not for everyone anyway. After Thor told me Loki had intentionally created immature clones, we spent almost a whole year on one of his ships, floating around while the Asgard tried to find a planet two hundred teenagers couldn't trash. A whole year floating around in space. Daniel's favorite pastime was to find me and say, "I spy, with my little eye, something beginning with S." He'd always say 'space'. Even when I refused to answer. When he did it with Teal'c, the big guy threatened to throw him out of an airlock.

Teal'c was one of the people that had trouble starting over. See, for him it was a little more complicated. He didn't have a symbiote _and_ he didn't need the tretonin anymore. Hell, he didn’t even have a pouch or gold tattoo. On top of that, he was a kid. Whenever I spoke to him, he would look at me like I had seaweed growing out of my nose. Like there was no way I was O'Neill. He spent two years totally freaked out of his Barry White loving head.

Then one night, him and Carter disappeared. They came back the next morning, all ooey gooey and suddenly Teal'c was all, 'We are blessed for second chances O'Neill. We will do better than the others.' I of course discussed this with Daniel who theorized that Teal'c and Carter couldn't have slept together or developed romantic feelings on account of the fact that Teal'c was still alive.

_"Right. And it's not even because his symbiote protects him,"_ Daniel had added. Guy loses his glasses and thinks he's a comedian.

We never found out exactly what Carter did to make Teal'c all full of good juju, but that's what he is. We're talking about the SGC-II's councilor by the way. He's solved more relationship problems than Dr. Ruth. So, not really that many. I am _so_ avoiding the rumors about his sex therapy sessions. There's just something wrong about hearing Teal'c say the word 'penis'. Oh and him and Frasier are at it like rabbits. I know I'm still trying to figure out the mechanics of that.

Daniel, as we know, is boning Paul. It's a beautiful thing, really it is. Guess what lucky guy has the quarters next to Daniel's? Yes, that would be me. You'd think the Asgard could build thicker walls, but noooo. You'd think the entity known as PaulandDaniel could make less noise, but, nope. Observe:

"Oh God! God! Oh fuck! Oh! Ugh! Muugfffffffrrrrrrnnnnn!!!!" Thud! Thud! Thud!

And there's me, lying in bed, trying to read, while my wall is shaking because the little perverts on the other side think they're funny.

"Jack!" Daniel cries.

"Jack!" Paul cries louder.

"Jack!" Daniel shouts again.

"Thor!" Paul screams out and then I can hear them both laughing like they're the funniest thing since Abbot and Costello.

"Yeah. Very funny," I yell back. "Hey, Paul? Why don't you take a picture? I'm sure it'll last longer than Daniel does."

And cue more laughing. Yeah, real pair of smart asses.

Then there's Carter. We hang out a lot. She writes porn in her spare time. She’s very good. Oh and, she's also wild in bed. I mean, wow. Really, we're talking... wow. The things that woman can do with her tongue. I know, I know. Me and Carter, it seems so... wrong. Weird. Hot... I mean, wrong. But jeez, look at her! The long wavy hair, the tight fitting boiler suits and the lewd jokes. Who wouldn't?

I guess there haven't been many real relationships. Flings, yeah. All that love crap, not so much. Daniel and Paul have the love thing going on. They haven't reached the psychotic clash of egos and violent fighting stage yet. They will. Teal'c and Frasier will probably make babies. Carter will eventually move onto the women of the base. George will eventually stop courting his gal and ask her to marry him. You know, while the hair's still good.

Me? I will for the most part get to the bottom of the question of why Thor continually tells me he had no idea this was what I'd look like one day.

_"O'Neill, youth seems to have done strange and wonderful things to your face," _is what he said once.

Er... o-kay. And I'm pretty sure he was removing an invisible piece of lint from my pants once. I mean, where does it say you have to pinch someone's ass when you're removing lint from their pants? I do not think so. Hey, just because I don't say anything about the Asgard walking around naked on base, doesn't mean I'm up for any gray alien ass action. I don't even want to _think_ about the mechanics of that.

## 

*

I think it was around the time we were nineteen. The base was in full swing. We were all settled and the Asgard had undertaken our education for the last four years. I think we were finally accepting the fact that we were different. That we were moving on and away. The fact that the SGC didn't want any contact kind of made us not want them back. Kind of.

I remember walking through the eating hall once and I was walking along and heard Daniel's voice. I can still remember the conversation between him and Teal'c. They don't know I was there and I'm not going to tell them either. I shouldn't have listened, but I did.

_ "Would you go back to the SGC if they asked you?" _

_"No Daniel Jackson, I would not." _

_"Why not?" _

_"It is no longer our home. They do not wish to be reminded there are other versions of them. I do not wish to be reminded the same. The Teal'c on Earth has done many things. I have not begun yet. I am not he. We are different, Daniel Jackson. The path has been split into two and now we will take an alternate route." _

_"Right... So all that stuff that happened, it doesn't mean anything?" _

_"It means much to those that participated in the events we remember. But we were never there. To give the life we never lived higher meaning, we lower our own value. We are here, Daniel Jackson. We should stake a claim to our lives and decide what we will do with them and the knowledge we already possess." _

_"No foster home. No trying to track Nick down. No proving the aliens built the pyramids. No... no Sha're. I never met her. Never loved her. Never tried to find her. Never failed..." _

_"Daniel Jackson... you are not the man that Sha're married. He is not here." _

_"And you never killed her." _

_"..." _

_"Say it. It doesn't matter to you, because it wasn't really you. Because that's the truth Teal'c. It wasn't you. It was him, the other one. And I wasn't really there. It was the other... me. Tell me you have no guilt because you can see it wasn't you and I'll never give this being a clone thing a second thought. I'll truly believe that we're not them. That we didn't live those lives or feel those things. Tell me it doesn't matter." _

_"..." _

_"Tell me you're not sorry." _

_"Daniel..." _

_"Tell me, you don't feel that staff in your hand, firing at her." _

_"Daniel Jackson!" _

I didn't hear them say anything for a long time. I began to wonder if Teal'c had maybe strangled Daniel.

_ "Teal'c. Just because we're the clones, doesn't mean all these feelings will just go away. We might be headed on a different route, but we all came down the same path. I loved Sha're. I still love her. And I'm not allowed to grieve because I was never a physical part of her life? How I am supposed to get over that?" _

I could hear a small shuffle and knew one of them was about to leave. But then a chair screeched across the floor and I'm sure I heard the smack of an arm being grabbed.

_ "Daniel Jackson. Did he forgive him? The other Daniel? Did he forgive Teal'c?" _

_"..." _

_"Surely you would know this." _

_"It doesn't matter. He knows that no matter how many times he says Teal'c did the right thing, Teal'c will never forgive himself." _

_"No. He... we will not." _

_"I think you... he did the right thing, but what I think doesn't really matter. We get to have the pain and guilt. They get to have the lives." _

I guess some of us can't happily embrace the prospect of being someone else. Some days I can. Some days I can't. On the latter days, I make plans to override the iris code, walk into the SGC and take what's mine. Sometimes I even see myself giving Jack the finger while Daniel walks out with me.

Goes to show you really. Doesn't matter how different you become, you still hang onto the life that feels like it was snatched from you. Of course we're bitter. The Asgard don't make underwear and the winters are cold. So very, very cold.

## 

*

I was lying on my bed reading and laughing. Thanks to the clone genetic memory, my pre-existing knowledge of Budge as derived from Doctor Jackson was making it a funnier read than Daniel's Intranet online journal.

_The SG-303 lightweight glider is faster than any Goa'uld glider encountered. It's a marriage of Asgard materials/know-how and Goa'uld technology. Not only will we be able to outwit maneuvers, but we'll be able to launch pre-emptive strikes thanks to the self-thinking on board computer, which borders on being an artificial intelligence that can calculate offensive/defensive moves to within an accuracy of ninety-eight percent. That's ninety-eight percent without having ironed out some small glitches. I took second seat on the experimental flight, piloted by George and it was smoother than a baby's bottom. George was extremely optimistic about the new improved 303, especially since we didn't have to bail within ten minutes of take off like last time. And let's face it, if the Bird Dog likes it, it must be good._

I don't know what the hell makes Daniel think he should be keeping a journal. Probably Paul. _Hey Daniel, why don't you take a dump on the floor and we'll call it roses?_

Oh, I am _so_ not jealous of them.

Anyway, I’m lying there reading Budge, having a good laugh, thinking about picking my nose. You know, important stuff. There's a big blue flash and Thor is sitting in his chair at the end of my bed. I raise my eyebrow at the sudden appearance and say, "Come in."

Thor, not missing a beat says, "I was not aware I needed permission to enter."

"Hey, I'm a grown boy, I could be doing anything in here."

"The art of self-love is lost on humans," Thor says matter-of-factly and I just about hold my lunch.

"Er.. too much information mean anything to ya?"

"There is no such thing as too much information, O'Neill. Tell me, what is it you need my presence for?"

"What are you talking about? You're the one who came beaming on in here."

"It has come to my attention that you intend to seek my permission on a certain matter."

I rolled my eyes. "For a councilor, Teal'c could do way better on keeping his yap shut."

I put my Budge aside and moved up the bed, sitting cross-legged in front of Thor who was watching me carefully. I opened my mouth to speak.

"No," Thor says before I even make a sound.

"Hey! You don't even know what I'm about to ask."

Thor does his wide-eyed vacant stare. The 'watchoo talkin about Willis?' stare.

"I am _so_ going to kill Teal'c," I say, realizing the man who can't keep a secret has already filled Thor in. "Come on, Thor! Throw me a bone here, will ya?"

"O'Neill, the regulations are clear. The SGC wishes to have no ties with this base, therefore there is no chance of travel between this world and Earth."

I shrug. "Well, is that what they said recently?"

"It is not."

"So, if you ask 'em real nice, they might let us visit."

Thor tilts his head at me as if I've completely lost my mind.

"Look, when was the last time you talked to them about this place? A couple of years?"

"Eight years."

I'm stunned for a second. I'm thinking, eight years and the SGC doesn't even care about how we're doing? I know I shouldn't be thinking like this. It's not like the folk at the SGC are our parents and we're the little neglecterino's away at boarding school. But, jeez. Eight years?

"Do not be disheartened," Thor says when I go off into a disappointed daze. "They simply do not wish to interfere in your development."

"Hey, I'm developed. I don't get much more developed than this. So you can tell them to quit worryin’ about interfering," I say getting pretty pissed off as I land back on the bed and sigh.

"Why do you wish to visit Earth?"

I shrug and throw an arm over my eyes. "I dunno. Just."

"That is a most obscure answer."

"I just... wanted to see how everything was. How different."

Lie, lie, lie, lie, LIE. Lie like a DOG. I wanted to go back and see Daniel. I wanted to see what ten years did to him. I wanted him to see me. And maybe I wanted him to want me. Maybe he would look at me and then look at the _other_ guy and think, 'damn!'. A nasty little vicious part of me wanted Daniel to see me and know it was way too late. He made his choice and it was gray, wrinkly and old.

Of course the rational part of my brain reminded me that if Daniel ever said 'stay' I would probably fall at his feet and stay forever. But he wouldn't, because he likes to weigh stuff up in right and wrong. I would be wrong. _**He**_ would be right.

"Things are different. You may not like what you see."

I instantly sit up and look at Thor. "What do you mean? What's wrong?"

Thor looked as though he was frowning at me in that, 'why ask when you know I won't answer?' way. "I cannot disclose any information without the consent of the SGC."

"Thor, look, I'm not saying you have to do this, but at least ask them if we can maybe visit. One off. Never again. Come on, they've gotta be curious."

Thor went very still and I wondered momentarily if the Asgard can have heart attacks and stuff. "Thor?"

A tilt of the head indicated that Thor hadn't passed on. "I will speak to the General. If he accepts your proposal, then you and anyone that wishes to visit Earth may do so. If the answer is no, then the matter is closed. Is that understood?"

"Totally, absolutely and without a shadow of a doubt," I say quickly before he can change his mind. "Thanks, Thor. I really appreciate this," I add sincerely.

Thor kind of just sits there and stares away. I can't help myself because I'm so darned excited by the prospect of possibly seeing hotass Daniel again that I lean forward and give Thor a hug. An idea I severely regret when he pats my ass.

## 

*

Two days later, around about four in the morning, I'm asleep and just happen to wake up. I yawn, stretch and pretty much intend to go right back to sleep when I realize something very strange. Someone is sitting next to the bed and watching me. I switch the lamp on.

"Daniel. Hey."

"Hey," Daniel replies, like sitting around watching people sleep is no biggie.

"Uh... somethin' on your mind?"

"Couldn't sleep," he says. O-kay.

"How come you're not with Paul?"

"Sam's unit came back a few hours ago. They found a site that definitely saw some Ancients move through it pretty recently. Paul's gone down there to help bag and tag."

He's being all matter-of-fact about it. Just sitting there and telling me this stuff like he's reading a really maudlin poem or something. Flat voiced and eyes locked in a stare.

"Okay, Daniel. Let's hear it," I say, sitting up.

"There's a rumor going around and I want to know if it's true."

"No," I instantly reply. "Contrary to popular belief, I do not want a threesome with you and Paul."

Daniel glares.

"Okay, maybe if I'm drunk."

Another glare that freezes my balls off.

"It probably wouldn't be a very big drink," I add lamely.

"Did you ask Thor if we could visit the SGC?"

I close my eyes and groan. "No. Maybe. Yes. Yes, I asked Thor."

Daniel stops looking like Kathy Bates from _Misery_ and frowns a little as he moves from the chair to sit on the edge of my bed.

Daniel let's out an exasperated sigh with a shake of the head. "Why do you want to go?"

"You're telling me you _don't_ want to?"

"Jack, how can we move on if we never let go? If we keep going back?"

"It's been ten years, Daniel, we moved on plenty. I just want to..."

"Fuck him?" Daniel snaps.

"Excuse me?"

"_Him_. You only want to go back for him, the other... me. To make it happen, right? Look me in the eye and tell me he's _not_ the reason you want to go back?"

Daniel pretty much pisses me off by this point and I'm doing all I can to not to throw him out. So what if he's right? Big fucking deal. He thinks I haven't let go. Well, that's bullshit, because I have let go. I've let go of everything that Jack O'Neill is supposed to be. I'm Jack O'Neill. A guy that had no life before fifteen. I'm not _him_, I'm me. But there's one thing about his life I couldn't let go of. Daniel Jackson. How am I supposed to move on with a twenty-five year old version of his face in front of mine twenty-two and half hours a day? It's the love thing. It does not go away.

Daniel takes my silence as some evidence of guilt. I don't care.

"Jack, we'll never move on like this. How can we find out who we really are if we keep going back to square one? This is home. We don't have to be the copies here. We get to be real. The minute we step back in the SGC, we'll be the clones. They didn't want us around, remember?"

"You want to move on? Is that why every time you look at me it's with disappointment because I didn't turn into the Jack O'Neill that belongs in your wet dreams? That's moving on?"

It's a shitty thing to say, but I don't care because I want to hurt him. It's almost like hurting the _other_ Daniel. I want them both to hurt because I don't get to have either one. One was never mine and the other one will never be the Daniel I want.

"That's not true," Daniel says quietly. "I've moved past that."

"You fucking liar!" I snap. "If there was a small chance you and he could be together, you would dump Paul like a bad habit."

"Not true. Anything I ever felt for Jack O'Neill is a lie. It's not real. Real is here and now."

I moved across the bed quickly and grab Daniel by the front of his shirt. He tries to break away, but before he can I kiss him hard and shove my tongue down his throat. He grunts against me and tries to push me off at first, but then relaxes. My grip loosens on him and he just pulls his face away. I look at him closely. He's doing that thing again. Getting fucked up about stuff that's not in our control.

"That was real. Feel anything? I didn't. You remember how it was for them? How it felt? How good it felt? Is it so wrong to want that? Yeah, I want to see him. I want him to see me too. This time though, I won't be the clone. I'll be me. Ten whole years of me. Big fucking deal I'm a clone. Like every living thing, Daniel, we didn't choose to be here. We're just here. You don't get more real than that."

"And what if you see _Doctor_ Jackson? You're going to try and lure him away from the other guy? Get a clue, Jack. Moving on has nothing to do with changing into something different. It's about letting go of something you know you can't have and doesn't belong to you."

I sigh, because I've got nothing to say. There's some stuff you just get move on from. I can tell myself it wasn't my gun. It wasn't my son. But that doesn't make it stop hurting. Doesn't mean I don't miss the kid. "I just want to see him, Daniel."

Daniel looks at me and it's that patented Jackson look of sympathy. Every Daniel Jackson, in every reality, clone, robot or... real, has that look. That look that says, 'your dog's about to be put down and you don't even know, do you?' I look at him and think, any minute now he's going to pat me on my head or buy me a puppy.

"You'll come back heartbroken," he says quietly.

I nod. "I know."

Daniel shakes his head and laughs. "You're an idiot."

I smile at him proudly. "But you still think I'm cute right?"

He laughs some more and then gives me an indignant, "No."

Daniel sighs and stares at the wall for a moment and then turns to look at me. "Move over."

I move to the side of the bed and lie back, Daniel lying down next to me, staring at the ceiling.

"Thor said yes," he mutters.

Ah. Right. "I didn't know that."

"So you get to see them again."

"What about you?"

"I'm staying here. You realize you're the only person who wants to do this?"

"Really?"

"Jack, nobody wants to see how someone else lived out their life. We're happy where we are."

He's such a fucking liar. "Don't you want to see Jack?"

"What for? He's got his Daniel, I'm just a freak spare. Like an extra toe or something."

I laugh. "Well, when you put it that way."

He goes all quiet again for a long time and I think he's probably fallen asleep. Then he stops me from falling asleep by saying, "I wish we could have made it work."

I look across at him, but he's still staring at the ceiling. "Made what work?"

"Me and you," he says slowly. "I wanted it to be the way it was with them two. With us it just felt weird."

I sigh. I seem to be doing that a lot lately. "At least you have Paul."

"Yeah. Paul. I'm in love with Paul," he says in such a fucking unconvincing voice, I'm actually shocked he even bothered.

"You keep telling yourself that," I say dryly.

Daniel ignores me completely. So, blind love, I guess. "Paul's great," he says. "He's so smart and funny."

"Oh?"

Daniel laughs. "Oh yeah, he said something so funny the other day. What was it? What did he say? Damn... what was it, I laughed really hard..." Daniel trails off trying to recall the ghost of Paul's so called humor.

I clear my throat.

"No, wait, it's right there, I just can't remember... it was really funny..."

I turn over on to my side, back towards Daniel. "Goodnight, Daniel."

"Huh... it's totally gone," Daniel is saying in bewilderment.

I try not to laugh at him and close my eyes. Geek.

## 

*

When I wake up again, I'm half turned backwards and I can feel Daniel's breath on my neck. He's lying there against me, his knee between my legs and his arm messily thrown over me, hand hanging in front of my chest. I sigh and relax against him. Moments like this make me realize how fucked we all are. There's nothing I'd like more than to just turn around and kiss him. No regulations. No rules. Nothing getting in our way.

But he's not mine. And he doesn't think I'm his. Times like this, we don't really belong to anyone or anywhere. This is what it's like to be the _other_ guy.

## 

*

You know that feeling you get before going to the dentist? No, wait. Know that feeling you get in the dentist waiting room when you hear the drill inside? Take that feeling and multiply it by a million and you'll have an idea of how I felt as I waited for Thor in the gate room.

I was the only one there. I couldn't understand it. How could I be the only one that wanted to go back? Way to make a guy feel like a freak. Or maybe only I felt like I had something to go back for. Pretty needy huh?

"Hey," Daniel said, striding in.

I turned to look at him dressed in black BDU's like me. He looked a little different than usual though. His face seemed... I dunno, cleaner. Like someone had steamed it. And his hair was doing all kinds of tufty.

"Come to see me off?"

Daniel gave me a look that gave the extremities frostbite. He stuck his hands in his pocket and stared at the gate.

"You're coming?" I said with a smile.

"Shut up," Daniel said flatly.

"What about the fuck puppet?"

Daniel frowned at me irritably, "His name's Paul. And no, he's not coming."

I opened my mouth to speak, but Daniel cut me off. "And no, I'm not talking about his inability to orgasm."

I laughed. "Really? No wonder you look cranky."

Daniel remained as frozen as Alaska. "I'm going with you because I'm your friend. You might need me. I don't really give a shit about the SGC."

"Thanks," I said to the little liar. "Just us then, huh?"

Daniel looked towards the corridor. "No. There's about fifty people on their way."

Not the only freak then.

## 

*

I'm not sure how I'd expected the SGC to change in ten years, but I was pretty certain it would look at least a little different. But it didn't. Not much had changed at all. Gray. Concrete.

Gray.

Did I mention the concrete?

Daniel and I were last onto the ramp, hiding behind everyone else. It's funny how as soon as my feet hit the ramp, I felt like jumping back into the wormhole. It occurred to me then what a spectacularly bad idea this could be. I couldn't hear who was down at the front, greeting Thor, but it didn't sound like a familiar voice. I took a few deep breaths as I stepped forward.

"You okay?" Daniel whispered next to me.

"Yeah... I think I'm gonna throw up."

"Do me a favor and keep that for when you meet the good doctor."

I just narrowed my eyes at Daniel, not believing how jealous he was of the other Daniel. I was about to point out how jealousy was unhealthy and then I remembered a certain man called Colonel O'Neill, also known to me as Colon A'Hole and my none too non-violent feelings towards him.

We all moved off the ramp and finally I came face to face with the guy at the front. I recognized his rank straight away as General, although he wasn't Hammond.

The man was a little taller than Hammond and a littler wrinklier. He looked a lot like General West, only older. "General?" I asked.

The General looked amazed as he stared at me and Daniel. "Yes. General Robert Peterson. Jack O'Neill I presume," he said shaking my hand. He shook Daniel's hand as Daniel introduced himself before the General could call him 'doctor'.

"I was expecting to see General Hammond," I said, trying not to sound too disappointed.

Peterson nodded and gave a sad smile. "General Hammond unfortunately passed away some time ago."

The gate room went silent. God, how weird must it have looked. The freaky clones looking all sad because some guy they didn't really know had died. It was a good thing George hadn't come with. That would have been real weird.

I realized Thor was watching me quietly from the side because I hadn't spoken for a while. "O'Neill," he prompted.

I looked at him and snapped out of it. "I'm sorry to hear that," I said to Peterson, which just felt weird. I felt like I was the one that had lost someone. I mean, did Hammond even know this Peterson guy? I doubted it.

Peterson gave me a nod and turned to Thor. I felt Daniel's hand on my arm and turned to look at him. He was looking at me with that look that said, 'are you having a nervous break down yet?' I looked back to Peterson.

"Well, Thor, as agreed, the cl... your uh... your people can meet their... counterparts, maybe have a tour of the facility and some lunch. We've laid out quite a buffet."

I looked at Daniel whose face slowly turned to mine with an unimpressed smile. He mouthed, 'buffet?' and I almost snorted.

"Uh, General, I was kinda hoping maybe we could get started with the meet and greet, take a look around the old place right now," I said grabbing Peterson's attention. He looked at me like I’d spoken out of my butt.

"Yes," he said, "Of course. Well, if you just join your group then." Peterson stepped back so we could join the others.

"What? Guided tour?"

Peterson looked like the smug asshole I'd figured him for. "Well, I can't let you run around the base willy nilly. There's the small matter of security."

I didn't look at Daniel. I knew he was trying not to smile.

"With all due respect, _Sir_, if we wanted to, we could beam up the contents of this whole mountain without you even knowing we were out there," I say.

This grabs him because he has to think about the 'we' part. See, 'we' happen to be the Asgard. We look human and were cloned from humans, but the simple fact of the matter is that the Asgard made us and they've made it clear that if it's an identity we need, that's the one. We're the Asgard. Peterson looks slightly pissed off.

He looks at Thor, who I swear looks proud. Hey, after fifteen years you can begin to see the emotions on an Asgard face.

"Thor, that wasn't the agreement," Peterson says.

Thor slowly blinks. "General, I had not anticipated such a large group initially. Rest assured, the presence of my people will not be problematic. They all have identity devices embedded in their uniforms. I will know where they are at all times and I will remain in the SGC as long as they are here. O'Neill makes a valid point. It would not be hard for us to go as we please should we wish it. Surely after the help the Asgard have provided, you would allow such a small request."

Peterson looked like a great big raspberry, his face glowing like it was going to explode. He was so about to cave.

"Very well, but obviously some parts of the base will be off limits and I will be posting extra security to make sure your people remain in the areas allowed. I'm sure you understand."

Thor gave a small nod. "Of course, General."

We were ushered out of the room and not without Peterson scowling like I'd just kissed his daughter... or son. Daniel was quiet and I knew it was because he was looking for the Colonel. His eyes were all wide and alert, like he would jump the guy when he saw him.

"This is such a bad idea," Daniel mumbled as we walked down a familiar corridor. "Spectacularly bad."

We walked around for a while trying to avoid the fact that I was here for one reason only and Daniel being an ass was watching me pretend to take in the sights. We visited the commissary. Looked the same. We visited the infirmary, the same except for the fact that Frasier wasn't there. The briefing room was the same, except Hammond wasn't in the adjoining office. So like us, the SGC had somehow mutated into a clone. It was the same, but almost totally different. How's that for fucking irony?

And then finally the big crunch. I headed towards Daniel's office without saying a word. Surly Daniel followed me in quiet. There it was. Doctor Jackson's office. The door was open a few inches and I could see the dark glow inside. I could hear a shuffle of papers. He was in there. I felt so sick I was sure I was going to hurl.

"Go on," Daniel whispered.

I looked at him and I'm sure I looked petrified. "You comin'?"

"No. And you don't have to come with me when I go and see Jack," Daniel said with a grin.

I blew out a breath and told my stomach to stop trying to crawl towards my mouth. "Okay, I'm goin' in."

Daniel gave me a pat on the shoulder. Then he pushed me into the office and closed the door. I stood there, shocked, like I'd just been pushed into no man's land. I was supposed to stroll in and say, 'well, Doctor Jackson.' Instead I was standing there completely blank. Daniel was at his desk. He had heard me come in, his head snapping up, but he didn't turn around. I knew he was thinking.

"Jack?" he asked.

"Daniel," I said quietly.

He got up and slowly turned around, looking totally confused. Looking totally hot. Looking totally... Daniel. Ten years hadn't done much besides deepen some lines. His glasses were different. Small, black rimmed and rectangular. His hair was slightly longer, like he couldn't be bothered. It looked lighter, but no gray or white. God, ten years had only made him hotter.

"Oh my god," Daniel whispered.

"No, just me," I said awkwardly waving my hand at Daniel. Wouldn't you know it. One minute in the same room as Daniel and I was being a dork.

"Jack?" Daniel said stepping closer, his frown deepening as he stared at me. Then his face relaxed and he smiled. "Of course. No one told me you'd arrived."

I nodded as Daniel just kept looking me up and down in amazement. You know, it was a let down of a reunion. I'm not sure exactly what I had expected, but I'm pretty sure it was more than _this_. And then I did the major no-no. You do not do this under any condition. Like, this is the worst thing you could ever do. EVER. I lunged forward and hugged him. God, so fucking embarrassing. I was standing there with my arms wrapped around him tight, my face buried in his shoulder. A few more minutes and I probably would've started crying like a big baby. I suddenly wished Thor could zap me out of there. I heard Daniel chuckle in my ear and return the hug before patting me on the back. I slowly pulled away, I didn't want to, but I figured it might be a good idea. I stepped away and didn't look him in the eyes.

"Sorry," I mumbled, finally looking up at him. I wanted to punch him in the nose. He was smiling at me like I was a silly little kid.

Daniel shook his head. "It's good seeing you again. You look so... grown up," Daniel said with a laugh.

"So do you." I said. "I mean, good, not grown up. Not that I'm saying you look like a little kid either." I stopped momentarily, making an ass out of myself being an unplanned part of the agenda. "You look good."

Daniel smiled. "I'm old, Jack."

"No you're not."

"Well, I feel old. The knees aren't what they used to be," Daniel said with a smile.

I smiled back like a goof. It was so weird. I'd planned on saying a whole bunch of stuff to him and now I couldn't even think of one thing.

"Missed you," I said flatly.

"Must have been hard being away from here," Daniel said oh so fucking understandingly.

"No. I mean you. I missed... _you_."

Daniel looked sympathetic. "Oh."

"Yeah. You didn't even think about me," I said with a smile and a stabbing pain in the chest. Daniel didn't reply as he twisted the knife.

"How have you been, Jack?"

"Oh, just swell. We live near this great stretch of beach. Sun, sand, sea. It's paradise. It's a great planet. Has three moons you know. Really big ones."

Daniel laughed. "Three?"

"Yeah. And the sea? It's like the Mediterranean. Great places to hike and fish. You should come visit. You'd like it there." _Please, please, please come with me. Please._

Daniel smiled again. His hand reached out and I thought he'd touch my face, which was okay by me, I'm a pretty laid back guy. But he didn't. He pulled on a strand of hair. Okay, weird, but still pretty okay by me.

"Not exactly military issue," Daniel said.

"Nope. Thought I'd take the path less traveled."

Daniel nodded and withdrew his hand. I just about resisted the urge to hug him again. So much for looking cool and like the one that got away. Daniel was staring again, shaking his head.

"What?"

Daniel smiled at me. "I had no idea he ever looked like this."

"He didn't," I said. "His hair was never this good."

Daniel's smile seemed to fade and he looked a little sad. He was probably considering that trade up. Wise decision. If I were faced with saggy ass versus firm buttocks, I know which I'd pick. Yep, I'd pick me too.

"So, you all okay?" Daniel said with real concern.

"Great. Got our own lives, if that's what you mean. Run a little Goa'uld technology retrieval operation. Steal and sabotage. Our bit for the cause. That and anything that looks interesting. Thor wants to make sure we have productive and fulfilling lives," I said with a smile.

"The rest of your team here?"

"Uh, no. Carter, Frasier and Teal'c spoke to Thor before coming and they said they weren't interested. Daniel bitched all the way here and there's about fifty more milling around the SGC."

"He's here?"

"Yeah, but he's a bit weird about seeing you I think."

Daniel nodded. "Understandable."

The situation felt incurably depressing. I sighed and looked away at the ground.

"What?" Daniel's voice was gentle.

"I didn't imagine it would be like this," I said. "It was better in my mind."

"I'm sorry."

I rolled my eyes and looked at Daniel. "Why are you sorry? You're not the idiot under the impression that he's going to walk in and Doctor Jackson's just going to drop everything he's doing and say, 'hmm, I guess I was wrong, can I pick door number two after all?'. I had this stupid idea that you'd be old and take one look at me and think, wow, that's a peace of action I would like to be a part of. But look at you. You look even better than you did ten years ago! I mean, it's _so_ not fair. Actually, this situation pretty much sucks."

Daniel shut me up then. His hand was suddenly cupping my cheek. Not the cheek I wanted his hand on, but hey, a cheek is a cheek. He was brushing his thumb across my skin and I almost came in my pants. What stopped me was his look. His eyes were so sad. I put my hand on top of his.

"What?" I asked.

"You make me wish things I shouldn't be wishing," Daniel said quietly.

I raised my eyebrows. "Really? Because I'd totally support that and I think you should carry on wishing those things, whatever those things might be. They're naked things right?"

His thumb touched my bottom lip and I almost threw up. People do weird things when they're excited.

"Kissing you would be a very stupid idea," Daniel mumbled more to himself than me.

"No! It's a great idea. Go ahead, do it. I'm easy. Really, some things don't ever change." Yeah, real cool.

Daniel moved in and I'm sure my eyes must have lit up like Christmas lights. I closed in the rest of the distance and kissed him because he was just too damn slow. It was like I remembered. It was so right, so real. The best. I let my hand stroke the side of Daniel's face as we pulled away. I was smiling at him, but he looked sad. And it occurred to me that something was wrong. Daniel didn't fool around.

I stepped back. "Where is he?"

Daniel was silent. A first for him I think.

"What's wrong?"

Daniel looked at me, appraised me, tried to read me. "He died two years ago."

Fucked up universe.

## 

*

So the guy you got cloned from is dead. Exactly what is that supposed to mean in the grand scheme of things? The original is dead. The copy is not. I'm the copy. The original is dead. What does that mean? Is it supposed to mean anything? Are you even supposed to feel sad about it?

"You okay?" Daniel asked as he put his hand on my back.

I just sit there at the work top, shaking my head. "Yeah... I'm just... just... confused."

"About?"

"How I'm supposed to feel about this," I say feeling slightly frustrated.

"I think confused is about right," Daniel says calmly.

I look up at him. "SG-1?"

"Well, after Jack died, Sam went to work for the Pentagon. She still spends half the year at SGC as a consultant. Teal'c eventually went to join Ry'ac to lead the Jaffa rebellion. We had a visit from him last week. I'm guessing you know General Hammond also died. I'm the only remaining member of SG-1. The team wasn't rebuilt."

"What about Doctor Frasier? Didn't see her in the infirmary."

Daniel looked away sadly. "She... she died on an offworld incident not long after you left."

I leaned forward on the work top and buried my face in my hands.

"Jack?"

Looking back at him, I shook my head. "I thought it would all be the same."

"Things change," Daniel said quietly.

I thought for a moment, back to when I'd been pushed into the room. "You thought I was him, didn't you? When I walked in here."

Daniel's eyes looked watery. He shrugged. "It happens sometimes. Feels like he just walked in. Then I saw you there and... well."

Weird. Somehow being the clone of Jack O'Neill didn't suck as much as being the clone of dead Jack O'Neill. I felt pissed off. It had all turned to shit so fast. I got up and started to leave, but Daniel grabbed by arm.

"Jack..."

"You should have told us!" I snapped.

"We couldn't," Daniel said calmly. "We all promised we'd let you have your own lives. I'm not sure how wise it would have been to tell you that Jack was dead."

"I had a right to know. Sure he was a pain in the ass, but... I... we..."

Yeah, I was stumped. Exactly what right did I have?

"You were a part of him," Daniel said, like he'd read my mind and seen me feeling sorry for myself. I suddenly realized how much I'd missed him. Too much.

I got up and started to walk away. “I gotta go.”

“Jack?”

“I have to get out of here,” I say feeling a little desperate as I reach the door.

“Jack! Don’t go,” Daniel calls out and I hear real desperation in his voice. I turn around and look at him. He looks devastated, tears in his eyes. “I…”

“What?” I say, my voice feeling like it’s fading and my eyes stinging.

“I’m sorry,” Daniel says shaking his head with a frown. “Sorry.”

I think about asking him why he’s sorry, but it’s right there. He’s not seeing me at all, is he? He’s seeing the dead guy. He’s asking the other guy not to leave. I’m not really here.

“I’m not him!” I snap without realizing I was this angry. “I’m… I’m… not him.”

“I know that,” Daniel says quietly. “I just… I miss him,” his voice is flat and broken.

“Well, he’s gone, Daniel,” I say, trying to keep my voice steady. “There’s just me… and unfortunately, I still… I still… fuck,” I lose it and turn away trying to breathe. “I have to go.”

I yank the door open and leave Daniel’s office with the intention to never ever stop running. I hate him and I hate the dead man I was cloned from and I hate the SGC. But it’s not over yet because Daniel’s not where I left him. Instead, some SGC body is standing in the corridor and just staring ahead.

“Excuse me,” I say.

He turns around and his face takes on this shocked look. Obviously he’s another guy that just couldn’t imagine the Colonel ever having been young. _He_ is also Paul Davis, prim and proper in green. He is also a Colonel. Colonel Davis doesn’t look much older. He seems to look slightly harder, his eyes have this cool edge to them and I’m sure I spot a few white hairs.

“Davis,” I say.

“Colonel O’Neill,” he says not bothering to hide his amazement. “Good to see you. How are you?”

“I’m fine. And it’s Jack.”

He nods with a small smile. “You’re all so very young. It’s hard to process. How is my… I’m not sure if counterpart is the right word here.”

“He’s good. Needs a haircut.”

Davis gives a small laugh and nod. He’s about to speak when Daniel steps out of his office. In the light of the corridor he looks paler. Older. My heart breaks because I’m suddenly imagining hearing the news of his death. I never wanted to be around to hear that a second time. Letting him go off with Oma was hard, but when he came back I told myself I’d never have to let go again.

But that wasn’t really me. Was it?

Daniel looks at me and Davis and I notice that Davis is watching Daniel with concern. We’re all quiet for so long it becomes unbearable and we have to avert our eyes from each other.

Daniel finally speaks. “Uh… Jack, did Paul tell you he’s the new SGC second in command?”

Ouch. That stings for some inexplicable reason. It’s not like I’ve been replaced. It’s the guy I didn’t even like that’s been replaced. But it stings like nobody’s business.

I hold my hand out. “Congratulations, Colonel.”

Davis shakes my hand, looking a little sad. “Thank you.”

I just nod. “Look, uh, Daniel was here a minute ago. The other Daniel, you haven’t seen him have you?”

Davis nods. “Yes, I have actually. It was very… surreal,” he says looking at Daniel. “I’m afraid I might have told him something I shouldn’t have.”

“What does that mean?” I say not hiding the hostility.

“I told him about Colonel O’Neill. He was asking questions and… he wasn’t very happy.”

I close my eyes and sigh. “Fuck. I’ve gotta find him.”

“We’ll help you,” Daniel says as I begin to walk away.

“Sure, whatever,” I say leaving him and Davis behind.

## 

*

I’m the clone, poor me. Everyone feel sorry for poor Jack O’Neill because he’s the clone. So fucking self-absorbed. I’ve spent ten years thinking about Daniel Jackson, the Daniel Jackson that didn’t want me. I spent ten years pretending that Daniel was a mean bastard for not wanting me back. But why would he? He always had his Jack. He didn’t do anything to me. I did it all to myself.

He’s still in love with the other Jack O’Neill. I was never here. Maybe I don’t even exist. All of us clones, we’re all just shadows. The odds are that everything we want will not want us back.

I find Daniel. I don’t think he’s been hiding. I’m pretty certain he’s been wandering about the base and when I find him, he’s standing in the corridor and looking at one of the isolated infirmary rooms. He’s standing there with his arms around himself, something he hasn’t done in ten years. He looks the way I feel. Heartbroken.

“Hey,” I say stopping by his side.

He doesn’t reply.

“Daniel…” I start to say, but he cuts me off.

“This is where I died… where he died. The other me.”

I frown. “What?”

“After the radiation. I remember, I wanted to leave and you heard me and helped me go. Only, it wasn’t me and it wasn’t you,” Daniel says quietly and I see a tear roll down his cheek. “Jack’s dead.”

I nod. “I know.”

“I never expected him to die. I thought he’d be around forever,” Daniel says flatly as more tears fall. “I… wanted to… tell him, to say… something. Anything. I miss him. A lot. I keep thinking you’re going to turn into him,” Daniel says as he turns to face me, his eyes full of accusation and his face breaking. “But we all want to be different because that way we’re real. As long as we’re not them, we’re real. Right? See, there’s a flaw in that. If being different works then how come I feel…” Daniel’s voice breaks and he chokes, shaking his head and closing his eyes. “Why does it hurt like this?”

“Daniel,” I say stepping closer.

He holds his hand out to keep me away. “I can’t make it stop,” he sobs and I push away his hand and hold him. He struggles to push away and then just gives up, holding on to me and letting me hold him.

It’s a weird thing. While I stand there with him, it occurs to me that the dead guy is one lucky son of a bitch. He has both Daniel’s crying over his sorry corpse and I’ve got nothing. I’m just conveniently available. I’m a clone. I’m pretending to be different because it means I’m real huh? Maybe. Maybe there’s not much difference between me and the dead guy after all. Maybe we are the same, whatever path we take. Want proof? He’s dead and I feel dead. See? The same.

## 

*

Daniel didn’t hang around much longer. I guess he thought it was pointless. But I couldn’t go. Not just yet. I walked around the SGC and found myself sinking into memories I wasn’t actually a part of. It hurt like hell to walk through those corridors, like someone was drilling into my chest. I wish was someone _was_ drilling into my chest. Wouldn’t be so bad.

I ended up in the briefing room and thought about the mission to bring Daniel back from Abydos. I thought about seeing him again, seeing Skaara and Sha’re. Meeting Carter for that first time. Meeting Teal’c. Good memories.

“Hey.”

Turning away from the window, I saw Daniel. He stood by the briefing table, hands in pockets, his face sad.

“Hi,” I said quietly.

“Is he okay?”

I shook my head. “No. But he will be. Right? Tell me he’ll be okay.”

Daniel looked away as he thought about it, his lips clamping together for a moment. “Yeah,” Daniel nodded, eyes shining with sadness. “He’ll be fine.”

“And you?” I asked quietly.

He laughed, his face looking so tired. “I’ll be okay.”

And then what? A new lame way of saying good bye? I wanted to kiss him and drag him back with me through the gate. I wanted to tell him that he didn’t have to be alone or mourn Jack. I wanted to say that I _was_ Jack, that there was never a difference. It was all an elaborate lie to fool myself.

What I said was, “I think Thor might have a thing for me.”

Daniel’s eyes seemed to tear up some more, but he laughed. A genuine, honest-to-god laugh. “You’re kidding.”

“Seriously. I think he has a thing for me. There’s been inappropriate touching.”

Daniel laughed again. It felt good to see him to that. “Maybe he’s having a mid-life crisis,” Daniel said with a smile.

I nodded. “Maybe.”

“They’re waiting for you downstairs,” Daniel said quietly.

I stared at Daniel, waiting for him to ask me to stay. “I don’t want to go.”

Daniel stared long and hard at me, but he said nothing. Yep. My heart pretty much collapsed and turned into a black hole.

“But, I guess I have to,” I said and began to walk towards the stairs. I had every intention of walking out of there, cool and collected. I wasn’t even going to look at Daniel as I’d walk past him. I’d just go. But I stopped and gave him a firm nod, holding out my hand. Daniel smiled at me, like I was a five year old pretending to be grown up. I guess he forgot that in terms of mind, I was still older than him. Idiot.

Daniel put his hand out to shake mine and my brain stopped working after which point I threw my arms around him tight. I didn’t say anything. It was the only way to hang on to any shred of dignity left. Daniel’s arms slowly wrapped around me and I felt him pulling me close. He was patting my back as I stood there holding onto him like my life depended on it.

“Jack?” He whispered it in my ear. “You have to go now.”

“I know,” I said, still holding on. “I know.”

I took a deep breath and backed away from him, averting his gaze. Jack O’Neill would never be such a wuss. I looked Daniel in the eyes and gave a nod. “Well. It’s been a pleasure… Doctor Jackson.”

There was hurt in Daniel’s eyes when he heard my tone of voice. It was too close to the real thing I guess. Too bad. We all gotta learn to live with hurt.

“You take care,” I said. “And, maybe I’ll drop by ten years from now, see how it’s going with you and Colonel Davis. You might even consider trading in for a younger guy. A thirty-five year old Jack O’Neill is a beautiful thing,” I tried to sound flippant.

Daniel frowned. “You know about Paul?”

“I know a lot of stuff,” I said with a smirk. “Gotta go. See you around,” I said nonchalant until the last syllable where my voice broke. I smiled and ran down the stairs with the feeling of a knife twisting in my chest.

The gate was dialing up when I joined the group and Thor was talking to the general. Thor saw me and walked over in that strange camp way he always walks.

“O’Neill,” Thor sounded concerned.

“Can we leave already?” I said keeping my blurred vision fixed on the gate.

Credit to Thor, he gave a nod and walked off. The gate activated and everyone began to walk up the ramp. I followed, my boots feeling heavy and my body feeling like a lump of metal. I reached the event horizon and then stopped. Turning around, I saw Daniel in the briefing room, watching with a blank expression on his face. I stepped backwards into the gate and went home.

## 

*

Things were slow for a while. Everyone that came back from Earth wandered around like zombies, vacant eyed and confused looking. Those that didn’t go to Earth seemed angrier. I suddenly found I couldn’t concentrate on anything. I spent a lot of time lying in bed, just thinking and waiting to hear Paul and Daniel in the next quarters. All seemed quiet on that front too. Maybe this is what happens to clones. They all suddenly slow down and stop like a toy that needs to be wound up to keep going.

Maybe one day someone will come to this planet and just see all of us frozen in place. Waiting to be brought back to life.

I sat on the beach thinking about Earth a lot. About my cabin in Minnesota. His cabin. Our cabin. My cabin. The cabin. A cabin. I thought about our childhood. Our experiences. I was there. Only, I was a part of him when I was there and now I was outside of him. That was the only way I could see it without going crazy. We both existed, whether it was on our own or as a part of each other. I didn’t care about being different. I just wanted to live my life.

“Don’t tell me you’re planning to live here.”

I looked up from where I sat to see Daniel, sun shining behind his head. He sat down beside me and smiled. He looked different, his hair slightly longer as he let it grow out. He looked good.

“Just catching some rays. Watching some waves,” I said looking back at the sea.

“You cut your hair,” Daniel said touching the longer tuft at the front of my head. “I like it. Looks good.”

I pulled my head away from Daniel’s touch, smiling at him. “Thanks.”

Daniel smiled and looked down at the sand he was letting fall through his fingers. Shaking it aside, he looked away and at the waves ahead of us. I followed his gaze and the only line I ever remembered from any poem came to my head. Don't look so surprised. I _can_ read you know.

"What d'you know, it's true," I said. "The tide rises. The tide falls."

Daniel pinned me with a confused look. "What?"

"It's a poem. I think. I hope. Might not be. I might just be making it up," I said watching the waves.

The tide rises, the tide falls.

Daniel shook his head. "No, it is a poem. I just didn't think you..."

"Knew how to read?" I said with a grin.

Daniel laughed.

"So. How are things with you and the fuck puppet? My walls haven't been shaking for a while."

Daniel gave me a glare. "His name's Paul. And, I've just been spending more time in his quarters. It's kind of weird with you next door."

"Since when?"

Daniel shrugged. "I dunno. Since we got back. It's just strange."

"You think Daniel Jackson and Pookie Davis are meant to be together wherever they are?" I said thinking about the real Davis and Daniel humping each other’s brains out.

Daniel ignored the question and drew something in the sand. Earth's point of origin. I covered his hand and let mine wrap around his fingers. We just sat there like that for a while, not looking at each other.

"You didn't answer my question." I said.

Daniel looked up at me, his eyes looking like shiny marbles. "What do you think?"

"I think you guys aren't going to last the year," I said matter of factly.

Daniel frowned. "That's a horrible thing to say."

"It's true."

"How can you be so sure?" Daniel said with an amused grin.

"I know these things. I have a sixth sense. I see dead relationships."

Daniel raised his eyebrows. "No, what you have is a sick sense of humor."

I grinned. "Let's put a bet on it. I give you guys less than a year."

Daniel looked suspicious. "What do I get if I win?"

"My homemade fishing rod."

"Wow, you love that piece of crap," Daniel said impressed. Wait. Piece of crap?

"That piece of crap, as you put it, is cutting edge technology, Daniel."

"Didn't you use the underwire from Sam's bra in that?"

"Like I said, cutting edge technology."

"Okay. What about if you win? What do I have to give you?"

I looked at Daniel as he waited for an answer. I couldn't think of anything. Then something just kind of popped into my head. Something I suddenly wanted to do because Daniel looked so confused by my silence. I leaned forward and kissed him slowly, tasting the inside of his mouth and letting my teeth scrape over his lips. When I pulled away, he looked at me all confused, like he was surprised.

He wasn't the only one. I was staring at Daniel, equally surprised. It wasn't supposed to feel that right. It wasn't supposed to feel so... good. Daniel slowly got up.

"I'm going back to base. Coming?" he asked quietly.

I nodded. "In a bit."

Daniel nodded back and walked away slowly, looking back once, still confused.

I looked back at the rising waves and tapped my mouth where I could still feel Daniel's lips and taste the Asgard's weak version of maple syrup. I found my eyes searching out Daniel as he walked down the beach. I watched him and thought about him. For the first time ever, I really thought about him. Not the _other_ guy or the _real_ guy, but him. Daniel who was a clone and just as fucked up as me. Daniel who always knew we were pretenders and liars. Daniel who professed to being in love with the fuck puppet and let other guys kiss him.

I laughed and shook my head, watching the waves roll in and the sun getting ready to set. I thought about the summer, which was just around the corner and I thought about the lake that wasn't so far from the base. It would be a nice place for a cabin. A nice place to go fishing with my homemade fishing rod, which I wouldn't lose in this bet. A nice place to be with Daniel once I'd pry the fuck puppet away from him.

Hey, it's okay. He'll get over it. He's still young. I'm in my sixties and way too cranky to start over. Don't let the twenty-five year old dimples fool you.

**\- the end -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Tafkar](http://tafkar.net/) has written a companion piece to _A Clonely Existence_ called [Clone Alone](http://www.tafkar.net/clonealone.html).


	3. Clone Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the final story of the trilogy, the clones come full circle.

I believe we were in gay porn heaven. It was the middle of the day and the sun was shining into Daniel's bedroom. I could see the blue sky from the window and I could see him making all kinds of faces in the mirror by the window. I checked myself out for a second. I looked good. I could've been a porn star, damn it. Daniel's way too snotty to be a porn star. Seriously, he is. He could be a rude reclining, but not a porn star. Daniel Jackson's not really a porn name. Jack O'Neill on the other hand. With a minor adjustment, I believe it could be a household porn name. Jack 'The Hammer' O'Neill.

"Why are you laughing?" Daniel gasped out and I could see his mirror image closing his eyes.

I just kissed and bit his shoulder, carrying on with the good lovin'.

I kept him on the edge of pleasure for the next hour. Okay, for the next minute, after which we both very ungracefully fell back in a great big heap of smelly, sweaty manliness.

"This is so wrong," Daniel said as he moved off of me and lay down with his face flat on the pillow.

I just rolled my eyes. There's nothing that puts you off notions of love and romance like the guy you just boned telling you it's so wrong. I guess Daniel's just not a big a romantic as me.

"Fine," I say. "Next time you tell me to fuck you I'll show you a picture of Paul."

"Fuck you," Daniel replied from his pillow. I don't blame him for his potty mouth of course. This is what happens when you grow up around soldiers. And Sam. Sam mostly. Well, Janet too.

I watched Daniel for a while, waiting for him to fall asleep so I could annoy him by waking him up. It was cool. I could get used to it, just lying there with him. Lying there, I couldn't even remember how the fuck this all started.

Probably about ten years ago, when we went back to the SGC to find the man I was cloned from had died. We came back and things were different. It was as if we just spent all our time looking at each other, even if it was a passing look that lasted a second. Months later he had a fight with Paul and they broke up. He came to me. We spent the night. He was back with Paul the following week. We pretended it never happened. They broke up. They got together. They broke up. They got together. Only I never let Daniel come back for one night of relief or comfort or whatever it was he came looking for that first time.

He and Paul spent the last ten years fighting and getting back together. I have no idea why. Then suddenly a few weeks ago, Daniel and me were back in each other's pants at Sam's birthday party. I promised myself it wouldn't happen again. I went to tell Daniel the next day that either he broke up with the fuck puppet or he forgot about me altogether. That time we did it in his shower.

As soon as I got used to the idea that I was having an affair with Daniel, he suddenly decided to feel the guilt. So there we were. Lying in his bed on this hot, sunny day while Paul was at the SGC-II. I almost felt bad for the sorry bastard.

That was until I heard the engines of a hovercraft outside the house.

"Daniel?"

"Hmm?"

"When's Paul due back?"

Daniel opened an eye to look at me. "He said this evening."

We could hear the engines of the hover-car switching off outside and the quiet crunch of shoes on the ground. Daniel jumped out of bed so quick he almost gave me whiplash. I watched him run to the window in panic and then run around the room picking up my clothes.

"Damn it, he's back early!" Daniel said, throwing my things at me.

"Good," I said, not moving from the bed.

Daniel stared in horror. Priceless. "What? What are you talking about?"

"Maybe it's good he sees me here. We can finally resolve this sordid little situation."

"Jack, don't start this. Besides, I thought you said this was exciting."

"That was before you had me climbing out of windows," I said flatly.

Daniel looked at me with that look he uses for groveling. "Jack, please. Don't do this. I can't let him find out like this. Please."

I didn't say anything and gave him the look that said I was really pissed off. I pulled on my pants and threw my clothes over the balcony of window number two. Then I carefully climbed down and hid in the undergrowth opposite the stilts of the house. There were many levels of foliage and rock out there and they hid me well as I got dressed and kept my eye on how exactly Daniel was going to greet his little fuck puppet.

It was beautiful. Really, you had to be there. Daniel quickly straightened out the sheets and pulled a blanket over the whole bed. Then he piled his clothes onto a chair and disappeared into the washroom. Enter Paul Davis who is looking around the bedroom. He takes off his jacket and throws it on the bed. A moment later, Daniel Jackson emerges from the washroom, wet and towel wrapped around waist. He looks surprised. Nice bit of acting there. Oh hey, Paul, I was just in the shower, masturbating and thinking about you, he says. Hey, Daniel, good to know you're not fucking Jack 'The Hammer' O'Neill, Paul says before sticking his tongue down Daniel's throat. Yeah, I'd be careful where you put your tongue, buddy, you have no idea where that mouth's been. I miss the rest of the x-rated show because I can't stomach it anymore. And I manage to fall into a bush of local poison ivy.

Yeah. Welcome to my life.

## 

*

"Why are you scratching?" George asked as we all sat around the briefing table, waiting for Thor.

"And what's that smell?" Sam grimaced.

I sighed. "I have a rash. The smell is lotion that is supposed to help," I said as I scratched my arm.

"Is it helping?" Sam asked.

I stared at the stupid grin on her face. "What do you think?"

Her grin widened. I rolled my eyes and sighed, noticing from the corner of my eye that Teal'c had a big smile on his face. How the hell that guy knew everything that was going on was beyond me.

"Something funny?" I asked him.

He smiled. "Indeed."

Yeah, these guys pretty much gave the word asshole a whole new meaning. I went back to scratching as Sam and George returned to reading some file and Teal'c continued to smile at me knowingly. Just then, the fuck puppet and Daniel arrived together.

"Morning," Paul said, all shiny and shaved and as anally retentive as we figured he'd end up.

We all mumbled responses back to him and Daniel. Paul went straight to Sam and George, instantly talking about the content of the file they were studying. Daniel nodded to Teal'c and Teal'c's smile widened. Daniel's ears turned red as he sat down next to me with a small, 'Hey.'

I turned to look at him and he stilled, ready for drama. "Hey, Daniel," I said way too cheerily. "How's it going?"

"It's uh...it's going good. How's it going with you?" he asked with fear, his eyes on me and the group at the same time.

"Just great," I said through gritted teeth. "The best ever," I added emphatically.

Daniel swallowed and gave me a clamped smile. "That's...good."

"Isn't it just?" I said with a nod and smile that felt as it was cracking my skin.

Daniel looked at the others, all involved in their files now and then turned to face me and mouthed. 'I am so sorry.'

'Fuck you,' I mouthed back.

His expression was pained as he mouthed, 'Sorry.'

I turned away, shaking my head. "Anyone know why we're here? Teal'c? You know everything. What's going on?"

Teal'c looked up from his file. "Thor has summoned all teams to speak with them. We are the last due to our constant unavailability. He has news of a sensitive nature."

Teal'c had everyone's attention.

"Sounds serious," George said.

They all started speculating and I continued scratching. Know what's weird? Sitting opposite George and seeing him like this every day was weird. For one, he had hair and it was so...bright. Secondly, he was young and the ladies just couldn't get enough of that Southern twang.

Then there was Teal'c. The man had hair on his head. Hair for crying out loud. No tattoo, no snake pouch and hair. The ladies send him love letters written on underwear. Seriously, he showed me.

Then there was Paul. He looked...actually, he kinda looked the same as the original. Short hair. Shaven. Clean. Mole. Irritating pain in the butt. Fuck puppet.

Daniel looked good. His short hair was always in the middle of a mess and a comb. Sometimes he shaved, today he hadn't. When he's lost in thought like he was right now and has no idea someone's watching, he looks...

I really hate him.

Sam had taken to having long blonde locks. Kind of had a Farrah Fawcett thing going on. It suited her. I liked it. But as Daniel once explained, my libido pretty much liked anything.

I looked better than everyone of course, but that's a given. The hair was getting a little long, but I'm sure it just added to the appeal. Oh wait, I forgot, what appeal? If I were so appealing, the guy next to me wouldn't be holed up with the fuck puppet. I kicked Daniel's ankle.

"Ow!" Daniel grimaced and stared at me. All eyes turned to him.

"You okay there, buddy?" I asked with concern.

Daniel looked around the room and faked a smile. "Just a cramp, in my leg. I'm fine. Sorry."

Paul still looked concerned. Awww. How sweet.

"You sure you're okay?" he asked.

Daniel smiled at Paul, all touched and stuff. "Yeah. I'm good."

Paul smiled back in that sick, filled with love, way. "Okay."

Paul, George and Sam returned to the file and I gave Daniel a look that indicated how much I hated him and his prissy little girlfriend.

Daniel looked at me through glaciers and mouthed, 'Asshole.'

'I'm an asshole?' I mouthed.

'Yes. You.'

'Bull. Shit.'

'Grow up.'

'What?'

'You. Are. So. Immature.'

'I'm immature?'

'Yes. You.'

'At least. I'm not. Cheating. On my. Fuck puppet.'

Daniel's response was a very hard kick to my shin. My response to the kick was, "Hmphffffooooaaaach."

"You okay there, Jack? Looking a little constipated," Daniel said with furry eyebrowed concern. Someone was obviously letting go now that he had two guys after his ass.

"I'm fine, thanks," I said tightly.

"Is it your rash?" Sam asked.

"Yeah. A little scratchy," I replied.

"What rash?" Daniel asked.

I pulled up my shirtsleeve and showed the furiously red skin underneath.

"Oh my God," Daniel said staring at my arm. I rolled down my sleeve and decided to ignore Daniel for a while.

Five minutes later, he put his hand on my leg. I turned to look at him mouth, 'I'm. So. Sorry.'

I covered his hand with mine and he looked slightly relieved. I pushed his hand off my leg and he looked a little shattered. Ha! Okay, I felt a little bad about that.

With a dramatic flash of light, the attention-seeking Commander of the Asgard Fleet appeared at the head of the table.

"Greetings," he said.

"Took your sweet time. Mrs. Thor got you doing chores?" I asked.

There was a small snigger around the table. Thor just gave me his patented vacant-eyed stare.

"You forget, O'Neill, the Asgard do not have genitalia to be led around by. Unlike yourself."

Next to me, Daniel sprayed out all the water he was drinking across the table. He sat there choking while I stared at Thor.

"Yeah, well, enough of the small talk," I muttered as I turned to look at Daniel coughing and mopping up the water with paper. "Get a grip."

"Sorry," he wheezed.

"I am afraid I have some unpleasant news for you all," Thor said.

"Let me guess. While we were sleeping we all got cloned again," I said flatly. It came out a little more bitter than I intended it. That's probably why it passed without a response.

"We received a message from Earth for help. Our attempts to respond to the message have failed."

There were no smart remarks.

## 

*

We started out our lives as refugees on an Asgard ship while Thor and his buddies tried to find us a home where we couldn't get evicted from; because that's what happened twenty years ago. We all got evicted from our lives.

Out of guilt, obligation and responsibility, the Asgard gave us a purpose-built complex to live and work in. It wasn't too bad. For ten years we all lived side by side, worked side by side. Then some of us took a trip to Earth and found out the blueprints of our existence were gone. We were now the only ones. It was hard going back to our fake SGC and staring the other clones in the face. It was hard being near them all the time. It was suddenly claustrophobic.

So, out of guilt, obligation and responsibility, the Asgard suggested we all begin to search out sites for our own dwellings. I guess it would be a way to mimic the existences we once had. Go to work. Go home. Go to work. Go home. Only, it was just another clone. Sometimes everything we do seems to be just a faked version of what we had. Just when you think you're living a new life, you remember you're just faking it.

I have a beach house. It's not my first home. The first home I helped to build was a cabin, by a lake. It drove me crazy in a day and I haven't been back. Everything about it screamed that I wasn't real.

Ten years ago, Daniel and I watched a sunset and he etched Earth's point of origin in the sand. I remembered that spot because that was the day we tried to move on. We admitted to ourselves that Earth wasn't home anymore. This place is home. I built my beach house on that spot. Maybe under the floorboards, the sand still remembers Daniel naming this place home.

I was sitting on the steps of my house, watching another sunset with a bottle of some homemade beer in my hand. I was pretty pissed off. We were all doing fine not thinking about Earth. We were all moving on with our lives, fighting the good fight. Then Thor came along and pissed on everything.

So what if Earth was in trouble? Not our fight anymore, right? Every planet for itself, right?

Right. Not my planet. Not my problem.

"Hey."

I looked up and saw Daniel, hands in pockets, khakis rolled up, sandy feet and a white shirt thin enough to be an onion skin. Man, I hated him.

"What do you want?"

Daniel shrugged. He nodded to the beer. "Feel like sharing?"

"I think I've had enough of sharing," I said taking a gulp of my gut rot.

Daniel sighed and sat down next to me, leaning back on his elbows and stretching out his legs in front. We sat in silence, watching the stupid waves, me drinking and Daniel just lying there. Before long, I felt Daniel's finger running down my back and stopping at the waistband of my cutoffs.

I threw my bottle on the sand and turned around to grab his wrist while he stared up at me.

"Forget it," I snapped. "Just go home."

I let go of his wrist and got up, walking away from him and his shirt. I walked a few steps and looked back. Daniel was slowly walking away. I went after him and gabbed his arm, turning him around.

"So, you're just going?"

"You told me to," Daniel said flatly.

"I tell you to come clean to Paul all the time!"

Daniel shook his head, defeated. "I didn't come here to fight, Jack."

"Then why did you come here?"

He looked at a loss for an explanation. "I'll go."

But he didn't go. He just stood there, staring at me.

"Then go," I said.

He didn't go. "I don't want to."

I didn't want him to go. That was the problem. I wanted him to stick around in a forever kind of way.

"Fine," I said. "Don't go."

I went back to my step and sat down. Daniel sat down next to me.

"Is it a sex thing?" I asked. "Because I don't want it to be a sex thing, Daniel. I'm too old for it to be a sex thing. No, scratch that. I feel too old for it to be a sex thing. I feel like I'm eighty or something, you know? I can't be doing this. I've done the being with people just for sex thing. I don't want to do it with you."

"It's not," Daniel said quietly. "It's just so hard trying to tell Paul. I try and then I chicken out. I just don't want to hurt him."

I looked at Daniel. "Well, it's gonna hurt. There's no way around that. We just can't be together like this. I'm not going to be the other guy. Being the other guy sucks."

"We still talking about the same thing?"

"Shut up."

## 

*

So, Paul's working at the SGC and knows that Daniel's _hanging out_ with me. Lovely little web of deceit we've got going there.

It didn't take long for our conversation to move inside, to the bedroom of course. Before long we were both in agreement with each other and indicated as such with many shouts of the affirmative kind.

Daniel seems to be able to sleep through anything. I, on the other hand, am unable to sleep at the best of times. It never used to be like that. Well, for the other guy. He could sleep through an earthquake. Gee, it must have been all that black ops training.

No, wait. No speaking sarcastically of the dead.

"Why are you awake?" Daniel asked sleepily from beside me.

"Well, someone's got to be able to say the guilt kept me up all night," I replied.

Daniel frowned and his eyes glittered under the dim light of the moon. I propped myself up on my elbow and frowned back.

"You think Thor knows more than he's letting on?"

"It felt that way," Daniel said, worry lines appearing on his forehead. "I mean, he's sent a ship to Earth right? Why aren't we on it?"

I nodded. "That's what I was thinking. Hey, isn't your boyfriend going to wonder why you didn't come home?"

"I told him that sometimes I just crash on your couch."

"We're just full of little lies, aren't we?" I said with mock appreciation.

Daniel, being another word for denial, ignored me and pushed me onto my back. He slid on top and kissed me, his fingers threading through mine. I just let him do whatever the hell he wanted. I let him hump me into the mattress and bite me where my skin still hurt. I like it when he holds on tight and uses his teeth. It stops me from being a clone that might just float off into space because he's not real. I like lying there, stuck to him with the mess we made. I like all the sweat and the salt and the smell. It's all real. Solid. It can't be faked.

## 

*

It was cool that he stayed until morning, because he never does. It was great we woke up in the same bed and got touchy feely. It was even better to be able to fool around in the shower. It wasn't too great when Teal'c walked into the kitchen while I had my tongue down Daniel's throat. Teal'c ignored us and walked past, fetching himself a coffee and donut. He went out onto the porch and sat down at the table.

"Is he still living here?" Daniel asked.

"No," I said. "It just feels that way."

When we followed him out, we saw Sam headed towards the house, shoes in hand and wearing a white dress. The billowy kind. I strained hard, but couldn't tell if she was wearing a bra.

Teal'c pushed the coffee cup to sit in front of the empty chair, awaiting Sam's arrival. Suck up.

"Family meeting?" I asked as I sat down, Daniel slipping into the chair next to mine.

Sam sat down opposite and smiled at Teal'c as she reached for her coffee.

"Thor said he was sending out a ship to assist. I think it's weird we're not on that ship," Sam said, straight to the point.

"He also said, we shouldn't get involved until we find out how serious the situation is," Daniel added.

"The ship was due to return last night. It has not," Teal'c said.

"Right," I said. "Something's wrong and Thor's keeping it from us. "

"If it's Thor, then this is something big," Daniel said looking worried already.

I nodded. Damn straight it was something big. I suddenly had visions of Cheyenne looking like a pile of rubble. "I guess we prepare ourselves for the worst then."

The guys nodded. Then Sam looked at Daniel and me. "So. You guys are having sex. What’s that about?"

I looked at Teal'c. "Does the word secret even mean anything to you?"

## 

*

Of course, I already knew something real bad was going down. I'm pretty sure that Thor figured we'd guess something big was happening. He was giving us time to cope and adjust. He knew exactly what he was doing. So when he suddenly appeared in my living room, I wasn't shocked.

Sam had gone home. Sam, who I still get the urge to call Carter. Teal'c had left too, with his hair and inability to keep secrets. Daniel had looked at me long and hard before saying, 'I gotta go.' I had shrugged and said, 'So? Go.'

Suitably hurt, he left. It felt good to hurt him like that because I knew at least some part of the message got through to him. Being the other guy sucked.

It was a weekend. Two days of respite. Daniel, Sam and Teal'c gone, I went back inside and fell on my couch. It's where I sleep when Daniel's not around. The bed just ends up feeling too big.

I was sleeping when Thor arrived. There was the customary flash that woke me up. I opened my eyes and saw him tilting his little head at me. I sat up and threw aside the cushion I'd been holding in my sleep.

"Well?" I asked.

"There is only bad news," Thor said slowly.

"Casualties?"

Thor was quiet. It made my stomach feel heavy. "Come on, just spill it, will ya?"

"Your former world needs our help, O'Neill," Thor said.

Ouch. Something cut. It was like a huge paper cut across my chest. It stung like hell. "You gotta give me more than that."

Thor just stared at me a while as he sat there in his Supreme Commander chair.

"I recall a time when my greatest concern was relocating a cloned SGC. Now I cannot imagine not being a daily part of your lives."

I stared at Thor, a horrible feeling in my gut. "You going somewhere?"

"No. I am not."

"So?"

"It is time for you to return to Earth. Your people need you," Thor said calmly.

"I thought you were my people," I said.

"And it shall remain that way. You will always be Asgard by the nature of your conception. It is as your guardian that I am helping you make the choice you will make of your own free will in the end, O'Neill."

"You don't know that," I said without any real fight.

"I know you. The Himinbjorg is standing by. Gather your belongings."

Without even giving me a chance to tell him to fuck off, Thor vanished. Big headed, superiority-complexed asshole. Where the hell did he get off thinking he knew me? Thinking I'd turn my back on this place? On him? I was so mad. I kicked the coffee table and threw a vase I'd spent hours making. I cursed the little son of a bitch. This wasn't fair. Nothing was ever fair.

## 

*

We were on a ship headed for Earth. It could have been the one we all started out our lives on. Or not. They all kinda looked the same. No one looked really upset to be leaving home. Some actually looked happy. Idiots.

"Diet Coke," I heard Sam behind.

I turned away from the window and looked at her. "What?" I asked.

She shrugged and shoved her hands into the black jumpsuit. "Diet Coke. It's what I missed the most. Sure, we've replicated the most important Earth cuisine, donuts, coffee, chocolate, Jell-O, but Diet Coke? We never really nailed that."

I frowned at her. "That's it? That's the biggest issue on your mind about going to Earth? Diet Coke?"

Another shrug. "I like the taste. Besides, you've got the whole brooding thing down great."

"You're telling me you're okay with this whole thing? Just upping stakes and leaving our lives behind?"

Sam smiled. "You don't get it. This was always going to happen. We were always going to go back. We just didn't know when. As for leaving our lives behind, we did that twenty years ago. Since then, we've just been faking it. We...are the Diet Coke. Sure we taste better, but we're not the real thing." She looked away like she was realizing some things herself. "Maybe nothing we do is real. We're just passing the time before we go back to our lives."

I watched her silently. I had nothing to say to that. It was pretty much the general consensus among us all. Being a clone sucked. Yeah, being the other guy sucked.

"See you later," Sam said looking a little deflated as she turned away.

"Car...Sam. You know they're all gone, right?"

She nodded. "I know."

I nodded back. "Okay."

She didn't walk away. Instead, she looked down at her boots, hands in pockets. After a few seconds, she looked up and frowned at me. "You know, I always kind of preferred Carter," she said.

"Yeah." I said. "Me too."

Carter left. I went back to my brooding. Earth was getting closer. I felt it in my paper cut.

## 

*

A thousand bottles of beer on the wall is nowhere enough to spend a whole ship journey to the planet formerly know as home. I walked around the ship. It was our ship to walk around; access all areas. Weird.

I didn't go looking for Daniel; he found me.

"Hey," he said, standing in the middle of the corridor.

"Hello," I replied.

"You okay?" he asked.

"No. You?"

"Feeling a little space sick," he said listlessly.

I nodded. "My ears keep popping."

Daniel laughed. That was good; it felt like things weren't so bad when he laughed.

"I...I think I want to go back," he said with a frown as he chose his words carefully. "And then I don't. You getting that?"

"Not really. I also think I left the oven on."

He laughed again, a little harder than before. When he stopped he gave me a reproachful look. "I'm being serious."

"So am I. Seriously," I said, smiling at him. He rolled his eyes at me and smiled anyway.

"Back to square one," he said quietly. "You think you've moved on, but really you're just standing in the same spot, running slower and slower."

He looked serious. I didn't know what to say except the first thing that came to mind. "You should probably see someone about that. An astrophysicist perhaps."

Daniel laughed and everything was okay. Until he left.

## 

*

I went looking for Teal'c. He’s like a star. He looks for no one; we must find him. Teal’c’s been interesting to be around these last twenty years. It’s finally emerged that not only is he amused by the suffering and humiliation of others, he actually revels in it. Come to think of it, every time there’s been a humiliation at hand, Teal’c has always been there to watch. The guy has one sick sense of humor.

I found Teal’c by a big window, of which there are many on an Asgard ship, you know, in case they might miss something out there that isn’t black and full of… space. He was looking weird. Weird as in standing there with his hands behind his back and his posture too correct for my liking. I hadn’t seen Teal’c in this contemplative stance since he’d been newly xeroxed. I wondered how hard he had tried not to be the other guy. I mean, come on, would the other guy ever grow hair? Nah.

”Hey,” I called out.

Teal’c’s head turned slowly and he looked at me with a calm and amused expression. He saw me and smiled. I stuck my hands in my pocket and went to the window to see what he had been looking at. Yep, space.

”So…” I ventured.

”It will be strange,” Teal’c replied. “I have matured without a symbiote, without the sign of the Goa’uld on my forehead, without the rituals that make one a Jaffa soldier. Yet, everything he was is within me. He can never be what I am, but I am he. His blood is mine, his loyalties and loves; we are the one and same. One day I will return to Chulak and claim freedom in his name. It will be good to return home.”

I nodded slowly as Teal’c turned back to stare of his window. “Right,” I said. “I’m glad we had this talk.”

## 

*

_Better. Faster. Stronger. Better._

I woke up, startled. I was dreaming about him again, the first clone. Harlan's clone. At least I wasn't him. At least I still had blood in my veins. At least I didn't have any reasons to ask myself if I was even real, because that's exactly what I would ask. It's why they died so readily on Chronos' ship. They knew they were machines no matter what they felt. They gave up the right to life because they didn't really exist. If I cut myself, I exist. At least there's that.

Not better. Not stronger. Not faster. Just human. I feel for them; it sucks to be the other guys.

It still fucks with my head sometimes. How can there be more than one version of a living, breathing human being? How can you copy a human being? How do you copy someone’s soul? Too weird. Know what’s weirder? The fact that the Asgard have chosen to live like this for so long. Cloning over sex? What the hell? I don’t even want to think about why someone would choose cloning out of those two options.

I left my quarters to see if we were any closer to Earth or whether Thor was having the ship fly around in a circle; hey, he’d done it before. I walked into George who looked as though he was on his way to see me anyway.

”Hey,” I said. “Coming to see me?”

George hesitated and then smiled. For moment it felt as though I was looking at the original George, bald as the day I had met him.

”I don’t know. Maybe,” he said. “I’ve just been walking around for the last hour. This is...a difficult situation. For some.”

I frowned. “For some. Not you?”

He looked at me with the self-assurance and confidence of a much older General Hammond I once knew. “You know what my biggest regret was as the commander of the SGC?”

I shrugged. “The over abundance of Jell-O?”

He laughed. No, it was someone else’s laugh; that indulgent laugh of an older man. I was losing them all. They were all happily returning to themselves and I was still stuck between real and fake.

”I… or at least the man I was cloned from, always regretted having to see his people go out there and risk their lives for their world. He always stood there and waited, wishing he could do more.”

”He did,” I said. “It’s why he was made a General.”

George nodded. “I know. But, the desire was still there. To do more. To fight. If he could have turned back time and become a young man, he would have wanted to fight the Goa’uld alongside you and people like you, Jack.”

”Like you?”

There it was again; the indulgent smile of an older man. He was so ready to go home.

”Not a lot of people get second chances, Jack. That’s what we’ve got here.”

I nodded. “Second chances. Right.”

”Think about it,” he said before turning around and walking away.

”Hey, don’t be expecting me to call you Sir,” I called out after him. His response was an old man Hammond chuckle. They were already home. All of them.

## 

*

Janet was in the infirmary looking at a computer screen in that glazed way people stare when they're miles away. I knew exactly where she was.

"Tell me again," I said walking in. "Tell me how this is all okay."

She turned around, eyebrows raised in surprise. "Uh, well, like I've said, on numerous occasions, the moment you awoke after being created is the fork in the road point. Remember, even your DNA wasn't a hundred percent match. You're human. Like the rest of us. Not a copy. Not anymore."

I nodded. She was right. Copies are the same. We're not the same as them. We're different. Different. I nodded again. It was okay. Just because everyone else was pleased to be going _home_, it didn't mean I had to feel it. It wasn't home. Everyone else was just...stupid.

"What about you?" I asked. "You excited? Everyone else can't seem to get back to Earth quick enough, even though they kinda kicked us out because they already had the originals. Not that I'm bitter."

She stared at me with this look that said she was about to tell me I was dying from an embarrassing disease.

I rolled my eyes. "Great."

"I want to go back," she said.

My eyes were too disappointed to roll. "Back? We were never there. _They_ were there. From what I can gather we were made in a small dish. I'm sure Thor can show you if you want, he's kept all our baby stuff, being a big sentimental softy."

Janet shook her head, disturbed. "Jack, don't."

"Don't what? I can't believe everyone's forgotten that we spent the best part of two decades trying to pretend Earth wasn't our home and now it's suddenly okay? You know why it's okay?"

"Jack-"

"I'll tell you why-"

"I'm not listening-"

"Because they're dead! They're all dead, which makes it okay for us to exist!"

I realized I was kind of rabid and foaming at the mouth when I saw Janet staring at me, tears in her eyes. Doesn't matter how many times you clone a Jack O'Neill, he'll always be able deliver on the being a jerk part.

I opened my mouth to apologize or offer some kind of excuse for my outburst. She held up her hand and cut me off.

"Yes, we're clones. Yes, we're the fakes, Jack. Yes, we've spent a long time trying to figure out how we stop being the people we were made from. I think we did a damn good job of it. We're not the same people, we can't be, but you can't stop feeling the same things; missing and wanting the same things. I miss my world, Jack. I want to go home. You can tell your head the memories aren't yours and the body's just a genetic copy, but it's not that easy to explain it to your heart. Yes, I want to go back to Earth. I don't think it's so bad. I think you need to ask yourself why you're the only who does think it's a bad idea."

She turned her back on me as her explanation bounced around in my throbbing head. She was right. I was the only one. I didn't want to go back. I wanted to run in the opposite direction. Into the nearest black hole, the worst parallel dimension or anything in that neighborhood. Anywhere but there.

## 

*

Earth looked cool, hanging there in space, blue and bright. The thought of stepping foot on that planet made my stomach tie into knots. I was ready to believe that I was a different Jack O'Neill. That we lived out different lives regardless of the similarities. But that would change the minute I'd step foot on that planet. There would only be one Jack O'Neill again; with his past and his pain. I didn't want to go back there.

There was a flash at my side, signaling the arrival of the supreme commander.

"Hey," I said, scratching my chin.

I saw Thor's reflection in the huge window giving a nod of acknowledgement.

"So...we're here," I said.

"It would seem so," Thor said slowly. I had no idea the Asgard could even look old up until this point, because that's how Thor looked. Old and tired. I felt for the little guy.

"We're not coming back with you, are we?"

"You belong here," Thor said unconvincingly.

"And what happened to us being Asgard?"

"You will always be Asgard," Thor's response was sharp.

I turned to face Thor. "Would you leave one of your own behind?"

Thor stared at me with his wide eyes. His little hand came up to mine and held on as well as it could to the bigger hand. "It is what I am doing. As it is among humans, all offspring must be sent away to find their feet. We can only remain behind for when you need us."

I sighed and patted Thor's hand before letting go. For a little guy he had a whole lot of emotion going on. At least three times as much as me.

"I guess we can keep in touch," I said.

"It is what all children say. You will forget your promises by tomorrow," Thor said. If I didn't know better I'd say he was yanking my chain.

"No way. I'll call every day. Then there are all the Asgard holidays. Of course, there'll be birthdays, weddings and funerals too."

We went back to staring at Earth as it neared the ship. Every time I thought of it as home it hurt.

"Tell me, how is your situation with Daniel? Are you still involved in a triangular relationship?" Thor asked out of the blue.

I sighed. "Pretty much. You know, I'm really beginning to see the attraction of having no genitalia."

"It does not always solve problems," Thor replied.

Yeah. My brain went to the bad places.

## 

*

We were geared up like it was a black ops assignment, people walking in and out of the changing room as they prepared. I was lacing up my boots when I felt someone sitting down next to me on the bench.

"Hey," I said, seeing Paul.

Paul gave me a very brief look and nod with an accompanying 'hey'.

He was very quiet; intense. Actually I've never seen anyone concentrate so hard on lacing their boots. He was really into it. All that sex with Daniel must have depleted his mental capacity.

"How are you with all this?" I ventured.

"All what?" he asked, his eyes on his fingers as they slowly laced.

"This. Earth," I said, wondering exactly how much sex he'd had with Daniel.

Paul shrugged. "No big deal. Makes sense, I suppose. You can't have two people occupying the same space. One has to move to make way for the other. While _they_ were alive, we could never go back. Now it makes sense to take back the places we didn't really want to give up anyway."

He finally looked up at me. Calm and serene. I wondered if he was boiling someone's rabbit later on.

"That easy?" I asked.

I swear his jaw clenched for a moment and had me wondering a million things, one if which was the present location of Daniel and if it was inside or outside the ship.

"That's life," Paul said lifelessly.

I frowned at Paul. "You alright?"

He got up slowly, like something was weighing him down. "No," he said with a sad smile. "You convince yourself you have this life, this good life and that you're happy and one day someone just snatches it from under you."

I gawped. That's the only way to describe it. I looked like a gawping goldfish.

He looked at me then and I felt like hiding in shame. He wasn't such a bad guy. "You don't feel that way?" he asked.

"What?" I said stupidly.

"Like we all had this life and now we have to do it all over again?"

My gawping disappeared and I returned to feeling deflated and apathetic. "Yeah. I know exactly what you mean. It sucks."

Paul nodded. "Yes. Yes it does. Well, at least we're all in it together."

He gave me one of those 'we're all in it together' smiles and left. I know what he meant. He meant at least he and Daniel were in it together with everyone else. That's what happens when you're with someone. You're a unit. It's you two and everyone else. No singulars here, thank you.

I sat there feeling sorry for myself because Daniel still hadn't broken it off with Paul. I felt sorry for Paul because he was nowhere near as depressed as he would be once Daniel would decide to come clean. I felt sorry for Thor because he was small and missing us already. I even felt sorry for the bastards we were cloned from because they were dead. It was a sorry situation all around.

## 

*

Thor's a sneaky little bastard. He gave us the impression that he was going to deliver a little pep talk. What he did was wait for us to gather in one place, tell us there was no time to lose and the next thing I knew I was standing in the gate room in Cheyenne. A minute or two of radioing later we figured out that Thor had dispatched everyone in groups of four to different sections of the mountain. His way of saying it was time to territorialize.

I looked behind me and saw Daniel, Teal'c and Carter. We were all staring at the same thing. The gate room was dark and charred, lights flickering on and off where they worked. It didn't take long to figure out why the Asgard had spent so long on Earth before telling us what had happened. I could see from the movement of ashes and debris that there were things missing on the ground. Bodies to be exact. Cheyenne was a husk. All signs of death had been removed. Not a corpse in sight. Just a whole a lot of space where people had died.

"Home sweet home," I murmured.

We slowly moved out of the gate room, Carter walking on ahead and towards the control room. I could feel Teal'c just to my left, hovering and taking in the devastation. Behind me, I could hear a slow shuffle of Daniel's boots as his steps fell on the debris strewn floor.

"Jack? What have you got?" George radioed in.

"Place is a wreck," I answered. "I'm guessing the power's gone and we're running on reserve."

"Nothing's working up here. Just a lot of dust and smoke," George said flatly.

Dust to dust. Ashes to ashes. Copies to copies.

## 

*

One of the rules of being in a team is that you don't drift off without alerting the rest of the group. At some point Carter, Teal'c and Daniel had done just that. I turned around and shone my torch down an empty corridor.

"You guys wanna tell me before you disappear?" I asked my radio.

"Sorry," Carter replied first.

"Yeah...me too," Daniel followed absently.

"Indeed," Teal'c added.

It felt too...normal. Us, in Cheyenne, like that. Like we'd never left. Like someone had locked us in a closet and opened the door on the eve of Armageddon. I wondered if we'd come back to die. Maybe that's what we do best. Clones, copies, originals; born to die in a blaze of glory.

Doesn't matter if you're stronger, faster or better. Doesn't matter if you're younger. Doesn't matter if you're real. You all die. You all end up under six feet of dirt. That's what being human is. You live until you die. That's existence. That's the only time it doesn't matter that you're a clone.

I'm not sure if I'd meant to do it, but I ended up in front of a very familiar doorway. On the other side was an office, the floor littered with broken remains of artifacts and other things. I walked into Daniel's office and my stomach churned when I got a short, sharp whiff of coffee. One second it was there and suddenly it was gone. I looked for the source, but couldn't find it in the trashed office.

There was nothing left there, so I decided to leave. I stopped when something broke under my foot with a loud crack. I don't know why I didn't ignore it and walk away, but I knelt down on the ground and picked up the object I'd just stepped on. A pair of glasses, one lens missing and the other cracked with several lines running across like a claw.

I don't think I can describe how I felt. Like someone had shoved a spike through my chest? Wrenched my guts out through my stomach? Turned my legs into water. I ended up on my knees, looking at the glasses in my hand. They could have belonged to someone that had been passing through Daniel's office; they could have been anyone's.

But I knew. I _knew_.

Now it was real. I was real. I was real because it hurt like hell.

"Jack."

My head snapped up to see Daniel's silhouette in the doorway. I couldn't see his face, but there he was.

"Daniel?"

"You alright?"

I looked at the broken glasses in the palm of my hand and shook my head. "No," I said. "I'm not alright."

Daniel stepped into the room and light fell across his face from somewhere. I stared.

"I thought you were him," I said flatly, still looking up at Daniel.

Daniel looked around the office of the man he'd been cloned from, a strange look on his face. Then he looked down at me.

"I guess I am," he said. "I went away. Now I'm home."

I shook my head. "No."

I got up, ready to leave whatever way I could. This wasn't home. It couldn't be home. Daniel grabbed my arm as I made for the door and spun me around.

"What are you so afraid of?" he asked quietly, looking straight into my eyes and my brain. Suddenly it wasn't the Daniel I'd known all these years; it was him, the other one. The one who was dead.

"This is where we belong, Jack. Even on Abydos, I always thought of bringing Sha're back to Earth, back to my home. We can't pretend this isn't where we want to be."

I yanked my arm from his hand. "You never went to Abydos, Daniel."

"If I were cloned a million times and someone asked me what the biggest regret of my life was, every single copy would say I wish I could have saved her."

"It's not that easy for me," I said walking away, only to see Daniel walk in front and block the doorway.

"Don't you get it? It doesn't matter! We'll always be different to them and we'll always be the same. There's no line where you can cut down the middle and leave their memories behind and go on with your own. This is who we are. Stop telling yourself to go after the life you think we should have and accept the one you want."

"This isn't what I want!"

"It's what we all want!"

"My son is on this fucking planet!" I yelled.

It came out of nowhere, against my will and better judgment. From somewhere inside, dark and faraway.

Daniel was staring at me, shocked. I stared back equally shocked. I didn't really know how to follow up that little breakthrough. Where's Oprah when you need her? I tried anyway.

"My son is here. Dead because he shot himself with my gun."

"Jack-"

"What? It wasn't my gun? It wasn't me? Wasn't my kid? That's what I tell myself. It wasn't my son or my gun. It's not my planet. Not my memories. The minute this place becomes home, it's all mine again. A dead kid, a broken marriage and a whole lot of regret."

"A second chance, Jack. A second lifetime," Daniel said.

There were tears my eyes. I didn't want them there and I fought them. "It doesn't make sense," I said, my voice forcing its way out. "I get a second chance when my son is lying under six feet of dirt. I was supposed to protect him. Not cause-"

"It's not your fault! It was an accident. It's fucked up and unfair, but it's not your fault."

"I shouldn't be here. All those near misses and all those times I lucked out; I shouldn't even be alive let alone be getting to live out a whole extra life."

"Are you serious?" Daniel looked dumbfounded. "Has the whole saving the world thing completely escaped you? You're needed. We all are. We have a purpose."

"I never saved anything. That was the other guy," I said ignoring Daniel's snit expression.

"Oh. Okay, that makes sense. Charlie was your son. Sara was your wife. But you never saved the world. Oh yeah, that's completely not insane reasoning at all."

"You can't apply logic to our situation, Daniel. It doesn't work that way."

"We get to feel bad about the things that went wrong and feel nothing for the things that went right?"

"That's the gist of it."

"I don't believe that," Daniel said. "Everything about being here says I'm home. Look around you, look what the Goa'uld have done to this place. Aren't you angry? Don't you feel anything?"

"Yeah. I feel like an imposter. I don't want to belong here. Jack O'Neill is dead and I'm not going to step into his shoes. If the Asgard don't want us back, that's fine. I'll find another place. Anywhere but here."

I didn't stick around for Daniel's protests. There was nothing about this place that made me want to stick around. Least of all a broken pair of glasses.

## 

*

Once the damage was established, everyone began to unload supplies for the clean up operation. I walked around watching humans and little grays working together to get the place up and running. Not a single person seemed to be asking themselves the question why were they bothering? Was this their mess to clean up? Why did they even care?

I made my way up to the outside. It was night and the place had no guards or security left. There was fire damage outside from blasts and explosions. I wondered how far the Goa'uld went with their attack and where the hell all the Washington assholes were?

Probably in Washington.

It was night up top and the air was cool. If it was possible, it actually smelt like Earth. I couldn't really hear the sounds of civilization anywhere nearby, but then on Cheyenne you never could.

A flash somewhere behind me alerted me to Thor's arrival.

"Where are they?" I asked as I stared up at the moon. I don't think I'd ever seen such a beautiful moon before.

"Who?"

"The bodies. From the SGC. Where are they?"

There was silence for a while and I wondered if he'd disappeared.

"They were beyond recognition," Thor said and my eyes began to sting. "I had them removed and cremated. The genetic identification has revealed some matches with our people."

"Who?" I asked as my heart began to pound.

"O'Neill-"

"Tell me."

Thor sighed. "Colonel Davis' remains were found and Colonel Carter's. They were two amongst many others."

"Daniel?"

"No."

"He's still alive?"

”The Himinbjorg has already performed a wide scale search of Earth. We were unable to find him."

I closed my eyes. There was some relief and a lot of frustration. I was finding it harder and harder to switch between the two.

"O'Neill-"

"Thor? Just leave me alone."

Again a long silence before Thor said anything.

"You are angry because your life was taken from you. You are bitter. It is understandable. But your anger should be with the Asgard. We were in the wrong. Not your world."

I turned around and looked at Thor. "I spent twenty years pretending to be different. Now I'm allowed to be Jack O'Neill again. Why couldn't I just be him all along?"

"Clone or not, O'Neill, this is your world. The genetic code that you are born of evolved on this world. Your body is connected to this world. Whether you want it to be or not, this is where you belong. It is written in the smallest particles of your being," Thor said quietly. "You must ask yourself what role you will play in saving it or allowing its destruction."

In a flash he disappeared. It didn't matter. My skin still said this wasn't home.

## 

*

After an hour of sitting around and staring at stars that slowly became familiar again, I made my way back inside. There was a little more light and somehow that made the place look even worse. People were moving things now, clearing corridors and checking wiring. I found myself headed up to the briefing room, stopping when I saw Carter sitting in front of the control panel and watching the Stargate.

"Hey," I said.

"Hey," she said absently, her eyes on the Stargate.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

Carter started to laugh. "What isn't wrong?

I laughed a little too. "Yeah, you got a point there."

Carter sat there, leaning back in the chair and I stood behind her as we both looked at the Stargate. The iris was open and the only part of the room that wasn't black from whatever exploded in that room, was the space directly behind the gate. It looked oddly clean.

"The iris is open," I said.

Carter nodded and tapped on the screen of one of her two laptops, which was now attached to the trashed control panel.

"Looks like whatever took out the controls was the same thing that stopped the iris from closing. The last thing to come through that gate was obviously an explosive device, but before that there was a strange high frequency signal that fried all our circuits and shut down our equipment. I can tell you one thing for sure. This system won't be dialing up that gate anytime soon."

"Great," I said as I looked at the screen of the second laptop. There was a small window with a list of dates and times next to the word 'incoming'. "What's that?" I said nodding to the screen.

Carter looked at the screen. She didn't look too happy. "What?" I asked again.

"I was able to retrieve a part of the last log of incoming transmissions."

"And?"

Carter just stared at the screen.

"For crying out loud," I muttered and reached past her. I scrolled to the last transmission and hit enter.

Two monitors above us flickered, but failed to show anything. The third one showed a grainy picture. There was a clear picture on Carter's laptop, but I found myself staring at the monitor above my head anyway.

Ba'al looked as smug as ever with that arrogant smile. Against my will, my stomach felt like I’d swallowed a rock and my heart was beginning to race uncontrollably. Like he was pointing a dagger at me right there. The air in the mountain was cold, but I was breaking out in a sweat. I didn’t need this.

"I promised you that your failure to surrender would lead to your demise. First I will destroy you and then I will take the Tau'ri world as my slaves. No one will save you this time."

Then he laughed. The son of a bitch laughed and I swear it burned a hole in my skin. Everything kind of faded for a second and I was being pulled back by something heavy. Like it was trying to suck me into a big hole. I felt myself falling.

"Jack," Daniel's voice was soft, but I jumped when his hand closed around my arm.

Carter was on her feet and watching me. Daniel and Teal'c stood next to her, worried looks on their faces. I looked up at the screen and there was nothing there.

"You okay?" Carter asked this time.

"You zoned out for a minute there," Daniel said.

I nodded slowly. It occurred to me that this was the first time I'd thought about being in Ba'al's prison since being cloned. I could feel the acid drops like they had just hit my skin. I could still hear myself calling for Daniel. I could still feel myself being chipped at, breaking bit by bit.

I walked past the rest of the team and towards the steps that led down to the corridor. Halfway there I looked back at them, the three of them side-by-side and staring at me with worry.

"Round everyone up. Get them into the gate room."

They didn't ask me why and followed me out. I went into the gate room and finally took off my backpack, throwing it into the corner. I took of my jacket and threw it on top. Until everyone was rounded up, I helped to clear out the gate room with the rest of the guys that were involved in the clean up. Before long, we were all just sitting around waiting for the last few, because there was no room left to clear up. Both doors to the gate room were open and people were spilling out into the corridors on both sides. People were in the control room and the briefing room. I guess they knew an announcement was coming.

I walked up the ramp and stood in front of the gate. At the end of the ramp stood Teal'c, Carter and Daniel, looking up at me, their faces serious.

"I think Ba'al's coming back," I said into the dead silence of the room. "He's coming back for the rest of the planet. I want to stay and I want to kick his snakey little ass. He thinks he doesn't have a fight on his hands because he doesn't know we're here. But we are and if we stay, maybe we can beat him. Maybe we can save the planet from him. Who's with me?"

Teal'c held his fist to his chest and gave me a nod. That guy's always good for a fight,

"I'm staying," Carter said.

Daniel smiled up at me, smug, because he knew all I needed was a reason and now I had it. "Me too," he said.

There was a wave of affirmatives. Of course they all wanted to stay. I was just the last guy to make up my mind. What I was really asking them to do was to fight. To get back in the game and they were all willing. Back in the game meant back to life.

As I took a step to walk back down the ramp, there was a flash and then Thor stood on the middle of the ramp. He walked up to me and held out his hand.

"Me too," he said and I swear it looked as though he smiled. I didn't even know if it was possible, but I don’t know...

I took his hand and shook it. "Cool. Let's kick some ass."

## 

*

Kicking ass involved getting our asses into gear and quick. Thor was having crap beamed in and out of the base. Carter had the labs opened up and was leading a team of scientists in preparing an attack of the sneaky kind. Teal'c was leading a team to secure the base. No one was to come in or go out. Not unless it was through the gate and at the present time, without a DHD, that was pretty unlikely.

I was in what used to be Hammond's office when I had been newly cloned. It hadn't sustained too much damage, but it looked as though there hadn't been a cleaner in a while. Actually, the last guy's nameplate was still on the desk. Some guy I didn't know or care about.

"Getting comfortable?"

I looked up to see George leaning in the doorway, a smile on his face.

"Nope," I said tapping the desk. "I believe this is your desk. Sir."

George laughed. "It's been a long time since it was my desk."

"Yeah," I said. "It has been a pretty long time."

"What's on your mind, Jack?" George said walking in as he stuck his hands in his pockets.

I sat down on the edge of the desk and stared at George. "This all feels...so weird. Like we..."

"Never went away?"

I sighed and closed my eyes. "I don't want to feel that way. Like all that time we were away didn't mean anything."

"Like hell it didn't mean anything," George said. "We spent twenty years with the Asgard, learning and growing. We spent twenty years becoming better soldiers and thinkers. Ba'al thinks he's gotten rid of the only real opposition he's had in a long time, but he's wrong. He has no idea we're waiting here. That time wasn't wasted, Jack. That's how long it was supposed to take us to get here."

"Right," I said. "Fate. Karma. Kismet."

George laughed the old Hammond laugh. "Something like that. Look, I'm going to check out the armories. See what we've got in this place."

I nodded as he left and muttered under my breath, "Guy gets a full head of hair and thinks he's John Wayne."

As he walked out, I could hear him talking to Daniel. I took a small tour of the office. Thirty seconds well spent around an office that had been cleared out in a rush. I wondered if the last guy had gone down with the ship; defended it to the last. Hammond would've. I would have.

What the hell did I know about the last guy anyway? I didn't know him from Jack.

"Whatcha doing?"

I turned around from the desk to see Daniel leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed. I felt a sudden surge of anger at him for not coming clean to Paul. I ignored the way he was standing there, smiling at me, looking all, you know, the way he looks and…with the hair and the…

But, that’s not the point. Oh yeah, totally angry. I even fought back my brain’s choice of reminding me of Daniel faces and Daniel noises and Daniel nudity.

Then there was a surge of horniness. Forced aside by anger. Not for very long. Angry. Horny. Angry. You get the picture; I was pretty much all over the place.

"Just looking around the old place," I said, rapping my knuckles on the desk.

Daniel nodded and walked on in. He had a strange little smile on his face as he walked in and sat down on the edge of the desk. I watched him splay a hand on the desk, his finger rubbing against the grain.

Horny.

"Nice desk," Daniel said very quietly.

"Excuse me?"

"It's a nice desk," Daniel said a tad louder, this time looking up at my face.

He didn't say anything else. Just smiled again. I knew exactly what the pervert was thinking.

Horny.

"You, uh, you ever do something bad in a place when you're not supposed to?" he asked me.

"Like... chewing gum on the toilet?" I offered.

"Not exactly."

"Cursing in church?"

"Er..."

"Jerking off in your Aunt Martha's house?"

"You did that?"

"You had to see the guy that used to mow her lawn. You would have done it too."

"I was thinking a little closer to home," Daniel said, lowering his voice and tapping the desk with his fingers.

I laughed. "That's sick. That would be like humping someone on your grandma's couch."

Daniel started to laugh too and we stood there like naughty schoolboys who wanted to do each other on the desk of the commander of the SGC.

"What's so funny?"

We jumped away from each other like naughty schoolboys caught in the act. Paul stood in the doorway, his eyes traveling from Daniel to me. He didn't look like a happy camper.

"I was just telling Daniel some stupid story," I said.

Talk about an awkward moment. I was standing there with my hands in my pockets, Daniel with his arms folded across his chest and a yard of space between us. And there was Paul on the other side, staring us down.

He knew. I knew he knew. And I knew he knew that I knew that he knew. Only person not in the know was Daniel. I don't think he knew anything. All he knew was that Paul didn't know anything.

"Well, I hope you don't mind if I pass on the story, but we'll be having visitors in a second."

Good, business. I could do that. "Oh?”

"I just set it up with Thor. He's having them transported into the briefing room."

I nodded. "Good. We should probably wait in there then."

I walked on ahead and passed Paul who sidestepped to let me through. While I went to the window of the briefing room, I could just about hear their hushed voices in the office. It was a stressful moment. On one side there was saving the world and on the other there was the love triangle of the century.

I found myself craving a smoke for the first time in almost thirty years; Xerox and original time combined that is.

The briefing room was a fucking mess too. When we found it, half the briefing table was...well, in half. So we took off all the legs and propped the whole thing up on crates of explosives and guns. Someone thoughtful had covered the whole thing with what looked like a huge blue drape. As for seating, it would be a simple affair with asses being placed on the floor. Predictably, only Daniel thought that could be fun.

Nerd.

A flash of light caught my attention and I turned away from the window, ceasing my efforts to listen in on Paul and Daniel's conversation.

On the other side of the briefing table stood a very smart looking woman, with a very jittery looking man. She was about five nine in height, in her forties, not too skinny, brunette with short hair and matching eyes. Nice full lips. Nice black pumps. Nice skirt suit with matching black shirt. Not a lot of makeup.

Her friend was about an inch taller, balding, athletic, gray eyes and sweaty face. He was wearing gray pants with a white shirt and black tie. He hated women, loved guns and played golf every spare minute he got. Just a hunch.

The woman and her friend looked around shocked.

"What's the meaning of this? Who are you people?" she asked as Daniel and Paul arrived at my side.

"Please, don't be afraid. We're not a danger to you," Daniel said calmly.

"Afraid? I was standing in my office a minute ago and now I'm in a room full of people I've never seen before. Why would I be afraid?" the woman shot back. Feisty. Nice.

"Look, I know you're freaked out, but we don't have time to go into big explanations. That's going to have to wait," I said.

"Well, I'll take whatever you've got," she said defensively.

"How about you let your boss get a word in too?" I said nodding to the sweaty guy.

The woman frowned. "This is my advisor, Ken Lovitz. I'm the boss; President Catherine Raines."

"Of the USA?" I asked with a raise of the eyebrows.

"The one," she said, looking as though she couldn't believe we didn't know who she was. "Now. Tell me what the hell is going on."

She asked for it.

## 

*

President Catherine Raines was somewhere in her forties, but it was hard to say where exactly. She asked a lot of questions and cursed like a marine. I liked her a lot.

We had all assembled ourselves around the potentially dangerous briefing table once Carter, Teal'c and George had arrived too. It was an interesting conversation.

"You weren't at all concerned when you lost communication with Cheyenne a few days ago?" George asked.

Raines frowned. "I'm sure you're mistaken. If anything like that were to happen, I would know immediately."

I saw Carter look at me from the other side of the table with surprise. She looked at Raines. "Ma'am, do you have any idea what this place is?"

"No. And call me Catherine."

Carter nodded. "Catherine, you're inside Cheyenne Mountain."

"I have to object," Ken suddenly spoke up. "You people are not at liberty to be discussing classified information that hasn't been cleared yet."

"You're shitting me. This guy for real?" I asked Raines.

"Kenny, as far as I'm aware, I have every right to be in this facility," Raines snapped. She nodded at Carter. "Carry on."

"Ma'am, there are some things we haven't discussed yet," Kenny protested.

"President Raines?" George cut in. "The Cheyenne facility, besides doing whatever you've been told it does, holds something called a Stargate."

"You, stop right there!" Ken pointed at George.

"Shut up, Kenny," Raines said looking at George.

"Yeah, shut up, Kenny," I said.

"President Raines," Daniel said, attracting Raines attention. "The Stargate was discovered on a dig in Giza. Fifty years after its discovery, the U.S. government was able to find someone to decipher the markings on the gate that would allow it to connect via a wormhole to another gate in the galaxy. A team of people were sent through the gate to a planet called Abydos."

"Only, when they got back, the Pentagon decided to abandon the Stargate project, because they're real smart and all," I said. "Over a year later, someone dialed in to the Earth gate and kicked our ass."

"So, the Stargate Command was reopened and a second team was sent back to Abydos to see if they could figure out where the attackers came from. Realizing the threat posed by alien unfriendlies and no doubt driven by the possibility of advanced technologies, the project was reopened. This is Stargate Command. Or at least until two days ago it was," Carter said.

Raines stared at us all, her mouth wide open. Then she looked at me. "You're shitting me."

I think we all smiled, besides Kenny who probably realized he was out of a job. "'Fraid not. That's the truth. Not the whole truth, of course. That'll be locked up in little neat folders somewhere in the Pentagon."

Raines looked at Kenny. "Is this true?"

Kenny looked as though was thinking about lying. Then he gave a tired a nod, which made Raines look really pissed off.

Raines shook her head and sighed. "It's too much to process. I only came into office a week ago. I mean, I was pulling out my hair over foreign policy this morning for crying out loud. This is...this is huge."

"That was just the starter," I said.

"Don't say that," Raines said shaking her head. "Please don't say that."

"I'm afraid we're the bearer of bad tidings," Paul said with a sympathetic smile. You know, from that perspective, he looked like a pretty good catch. "A few days ago, this facility was attacked through the Stargate by a powerful alien called Ba'al. He belongs to a species called the Goa'uld and Earth has had some near misses with them before. You'd be surprised how many times the project's almost gone public because of that fact."

"I wish it had. It'd be the only way I would have found out about it," Raines said flatly as she threw Kenny an annoyed look.

"Ma'am, it was on your list of briefings," Kenny said lamely.

"In short, Ba'al's on his way here," I said. "The Stargate was our first line of defense. Since our dialing system is shot, we can't dial out. That means we only have one position and that's the defensive. If we could dial out, contact our allies, maybe we could have launched an offense. He'll be coming in ships, with gliders and the old arsenal of alien gadgets. From what I can gather, Earth defenses have only improved in how much better we can kill our neighbors and not the bad guy out there," I said pointing upwards. "Now in the old days, some friends of ours had some nifty technology with which we could just beam them out of the sky to somewhere else, but those sneaky Goa'uld figured out how to combat that, so it's all down to ground control."

"And..." Daniel said slowly.

"And?" I frowned.

"Prometheus," Teal'c said.

Everyone turned and looked at him. That was possibly the quietest he'd been in years. Raines was frowning at him.

"Prometheus. What's Prometheus?"

"A ship capable of space flight built using alien and human technology. The first human ship of it's kind," Carter said with a grin.

Raines stared at Kenny.

"Actually, we had a ship called Prometheus. It was destroyed in an unfortunate accident," Kenny said, avoiding the stare.

"Buddy, you are so fired," I said.

Raines shook the cobwebs away again. "Okay. No Prometheus and imminent attack. What chance does the Air Force stand against this Ba'al?"

"We could probably put up a fight against his gliders, but the Air Force has no chance against mother ships firing from space," Carter explained.

"Mother ships?" Raines said, looking stunned.

"Yeah," I said. "Big ones."

"So, what can we do?" Raines asked.

"We're hoping that the SGC might have accumulated some technology in the last twenty years that might help us in some way," Daniel said.

Raines nodded. "Right. I'll get the Pentagon on it."

"Um..."

Everyone looked at Kenny.

"What um?" Raines asked.

Kenny gave Raines a sheepish look and sighed. "Um, Area 51 is where we keep all alien artifacts."

Raines ignored Kenny and looked at Carter. "What kind of damage are we talking if this Ba'al succeeds in his attack?"

"Wide scale devastation," Carter said not being too dramatic at all. "He could pretty much blow up any major city from space. It would be too late before we could even think of launching an attack. We'd never survive it."

"Why?" Raines asked, not believing what we were telling her.

"Because he can and because he wants to," I said, remembering the satisfaction on Ba'al's face whenever I screamed in pain. "It's what the Goa'uld do. It's who they are."

Raines nodded slowly. "I want to see this Stargate."

Sure, why not? If that made things real. We all got up, a little slowly because sitting on the floor for so long is hard on your ass. We all went to the window and looked out at the Stargate. It looked black in places from the impact of whatever had come through and exploded. That didn't matter though, because it still looked cool.

Raines looked stunned, Kenny equally impressed. "My God," she said. "What is that thing?"

I looked across at Daniel and at that moment he looked right back at me, a big grin on his face. He folded his arms and looked out with a smile. "That's the Stargate," he said sounding proud, like he built the damn thing.

I looked at it and smiled too. Yeah, I guess there was a little pride.

"How does it work?" Raines asked.

"Well it uses what we call a dial home device, or a DHD-"

"Carter," I cut her off before it was too late. Carter backed down with some disappointment. "It's not working right now."

"But we're working on it," Paul added.

Raines nodded. "Right. Okay. Look, this a lot to take in. I need to get back to Washington and do a little research."

"We don't have time for that," I said.

"I know," Raines said tiredly. "But I need to know more about what goes on here and if we've been in this situation before. I'm coming into this blind, guys. Gimme a break. Biggest problem on my agenda last week was comfortable shoes for the inauguration and whether my kid would stay still during it. This is a hell of a lot of take in."

"Okay. Well, maybe you need some more convincing," I said. "Thor?"

A bright white flash later, we were standing on the ship in orbit. Most importantly, we standing where the best view was. A large round window through which we could see Earth under us. Raines was transfixed. Now she was really impressed. She was standing right next to the window and looking down at the big blue marble outside.

"Is that…?"

"Yep."

"My God. It's beautiful," Raines whispered.

"And that is why you must do all you can to save it," Thor said appearing next to me.

Raines turned around and looked down at Thor. Words could never do justice to the look on the President's face. Her mouth was open for so long, I thought she'd start drooling.

"Thor? Meet President Catherine Raines. President Raines? I'd like you to meet a good friend of Earth, Thor, Supreme Commander of the Asgard Fleet."

For a minute I thought Raines was going to pass out. Instead, her look of shock turned to a smile and then laughter. She looked at me and Thor, shaking her head.

"You know what? If you've got any more surprises to spring on me, now would be a good time."

Thor looked up at me and blinked his spaced out blink. I took a deep breath and looked at Raines.

"There's something you should know about the people at the SGC."

## 

*

Raines wasn't so unsure after she'd met Thor. When it dawned on her that the Goa'uld had found a way of equaling their technologies with the Asgard, it was pretty obvious what a threat Ba'al was. Twenty years ago, the Asgard could take the Goa'uld. Not anymore. It was a whole different ball game now.

No, wait; it was a whole different Ba'al game. Yeah, see what I did there?

The clone thing freaked her out a bit, but I think it helped make her decisions a little faster. When she realized the whole SGC had already been taken out by Ba'al, she realized what wide scale devastation would be.

Raines gave me, Daniel, Carter and Teal'c a get in free pass for Area 51, while Thor beamed her, George and Paul to the Pentagon.

We were thoroughly frisked before being let into the candy store and then followed by three burly and armed guards. It was weird being there because we recognized some of the stuff. Real weird.

"Guys," Daniel called from a few shelves away.

We all instantly followed the voice because we knew that voice only happened when Daniel was excited and about to get us all into trouble. When we rounded the corner and walked into the aisle where he stood, I saw exactly why he was excited. It was the mirror.

"They've still got it," Daniel said reaching out to touch it.

I grabbed his hand in a flash. "Anh!"

Daniel took a step back from the mirror and gave me a sheepish look. "Sorry."

"I don't think it's dangerous. They've welded a cover on to it," Carter said, her hand going to touch it.

"Teal'c?" I said.

Teal'c stepped in front of the mirror before Carter's hand could touch it.

"Wow," Carter said. "You guys really don't like this thing, do you?"

"No," both Teal'c and I said simultaneously.

"Now,” I said, ”if you two don't mind, how about we look for what we came for?"

We split out across the large warehouse. There was a whole lot of weirdness in that place and only a corner of it had to do with the Stargate.

"How do we know what we're looking for?" I heard Daniel's voice bouncing around the room.

"I dunno," I said with a shrug. "Look for something that looks like it can save the world."

"Gee, why didn't I think of that?" I just about heard the small murmur and laughed.

I carried on looking around the place, but nothing had that 'this can destroy the Goa'uld' vibe going on. Away from the SGC and not causing trouble, most of the stuff looked like unrealistic toys for kids. I gave up with my corner of investigation and turned around to go. Then I just stopped in my tracks.

I suddenly felt compelled to turn around and look at something I had walked past.. When I turned around, for a split second, light seemed to bounce of the partially uncovered part of a...thing. A small metal part was poking out from under the covering and it gave no clue to what the rest of it was. But I followed it anyway. I reached the table and pulled off the dusty material. It was like a metal mushroom with little buttons and tiny levers. I had no idea what it was, but before I knew it, I'd picked it up and I was taking it with me.

I went back to the front of the warehouse and waited for the others. Teal'c was already standing there. With a staff in his hand. He looked at me and smiled.

"Couldn't find anything huh?" I asked.

Teal'c looked at the staff and banged the bottom against the floor. "I could find nothing else of equal power for a Jaffa."

"Well, a Goa'uld destroying nuke would be cool."

Teal'c smiled and gave a nod. "Indeed."

"Guys, I think I'm about done."

Teal'c and I turned to see Daniel walking up to us with a big box of junk. I stared. "And you think that's all going to be useful?"

Daniel looked straight at me and looked lost for a second before replying, "Yes."

"Yeah, me too," Carter said appearing with a metal cart about the size of a trashcan. It was so full, she was using her hand to keep stuff from falling out.

"Carter?" I enquired.

She looked at me like she had no idea what I was talking about. "What?"

I sighed. "Okay, fine. Whatever."

Our guards looked at the loot we were preparing to take and I'm pretty sure the grips on their weapons became a little firmer.

"We're ready now," I said with my best smile.

"That's fine, Sir. We just need to get the go ahead on all those things there."

I nodded. "Actually, I wasn't talking to you."

We just caught the frown on the guard's face before Thor beamed us out of there. It's good to have friends in high places.

## 

*

Back at the base, clones and little gray aliens were fixing up the place. The main generators were up and working, the gate room had been cleared up and the control room looked very different.

"What the hell happened here?" I asked Siler as I stared at the new and very Asgard console. Some of it still had very human features like two sets of keyboards and new monitors hanging above us. The additions were shiny new surfaces with Runes and English markings with accompanying glowy crystals. Very cool.

"Thor's doing," Siler said as he sat down at a keyboard, punched in some commands and brought up a diagnostics screen on the monitor in front of him.

"Think we'll get that gate up and running today?" I asked.

Before Siler could answer, the window in front of us brought up Thor's face, right in the middle of the Stargate.

"Hey, buddy," I said as Thor nodded back. "What's with the new toys? I thought you had a rule against imparting with Asgard technology."

"Since you have twenty years of Asgard knowledge, O'Neill, to withhold technology built with the same knowledge would serve no purpose," Thor replied.

I nodded. "I like it. Looks cool."

"Looking cool is not its only function, O'Neill," Thor said, before he disappeared from the screen in front and appeared at my side.

I looked down at him. "You love doing that, don't you?"

Thor tilted his head at me, pretending he didn't have a clue what I was talking about. Nice try. I totally had that guy's number.

Thor ignored me and went to the console. It was clearly built with humans in mind and he had to reach to get to the stone. He slid it across the shiny surface of the console and then stopped. A small section of the console lit up brighter than the rest.

"Aegar," Thor said.

Before I could guess what Thor had done, the gate started to dial. It was the quickest dial up I'd ever seen in the SGC. Before you could say wormhole, the gate was active and ready for gate travel with stunned personnel in the gate room watching.

"Much more efficient," Thor said as he turned to look at me.

I guess the little guy thought of us as family after all. It was the only reason there was Asgard and human technology running side by side inside Cheyenne. I couldn't imagine not seeing our Asgard teachers and colleagues every day. I was already beginning to miss them. I wanted to tell Thor, but I did the only thing that I could ever do at a moment like that.

"So, let me ask you something," I said. "At what point did you guys think that not wearing clothes was a good idea?"

## 

*

What I wanted to do was play around with that big mushroom I brought back from Area 51, but predictably, I ended up looking for Daniel. He had taken up residence in his old digs. I walked in and saw that there were piles of boxes around the place and they'd just been put down over all the dirt and crap. Daniel was standing at his worktop with a small, brown, metal box in his hand. He was totally engrossed.

"I see you've cleaned up the place," I said, stepping on something that made my boot stick to the ground.

Daniel looked up and stared at me as if I was made completely out of bubble wrap. There is only word to explain the look on his face. It's a word I never imagined using to describe anything or anyone. It was made for Daniel. He looked...befuddled. Is that even a real word?

"Oh. Hey, Jack," he said and went back to the little box.

I went over to the bookshelf where there were books I recognized from twenty years ago. It hurt a little, but I was getting used to it. I picked up a dictionary and skimmed through it.

"Yep, there it is. Befuddled," I muttered to myself.

"There's what?" Daniel asked, his attention completely on me now that I had peaked his interest.

I held up the dictionary. "Befuddled," I said. "To be perplexed. Confused. Daniel Jackson."

Daniel's eyes narrowed and he smiled. I smiled back with a small sense of victory.

"Hey, good news," I said putting the dictionary back and joining Daniel at the worktop. "Gate's up and running."

Daniel put the little box down and nodded. "That's great. How? I thought the whole console was shot."

"It was. Thor replaced it."

Daniel frowned. "He did? Wow."

"Yeah," I said slowly. "I think he's getting all maternal in his old age. So, any luck with any of this junk?"

Daniel sighed and picked up the box again. "No. Some small scale weapons. Nothing amazing. I'm hoping Sam might find something."

"And this?" I nodded to the rusty cube in Daniel's hand.

Daniel held it up in front of him. "This. This is the stuff of dreams."

Daniel had moved on from befuddled to intrigued. "Excuse me?" I asked.

He shook his head impatiently. "It says something about, dreams becoming real. Seeing your dreams; not fearing them. Something like that. A lot of the text's eroded so I can't be sure, but it definitely has to do with dreams."

"And this is important because?"

Daniel opened his mouth to explain and then shut it instantly. "It's not. I just got caught up."

Daniel put the cube down and I picked it up, taking a good look at the six sides. "It's this place."

Daniel looked around the office and nodded. "Maybe. I just wish..."

"What?" I asked, my attention still on the stupid cube; five sides of text and one side with an engraved image of two people in profile, one handing the other something. It was pretty. Meant nothing to me.

"I wish I could find some secret weapon to wipe them all out," Daniel said quietly, his voice low. There it was, Doctor Darkside. Every now and then I saw it. I'd wager that all the hate in the universe couldn't make up how much Daniel hated the Goa'uld.

"You know what we need?" I asked.

Daniel looked straight at me, a smile on his face because he knew this was me trying to make it better. "No. What?" he said quietly.

"Whacking Day," I offered.

Daniel started to laugh. I laughed with him. It was a nice moment, only ruined by a cough somewhere behind me.

I knew who it was before I turned around to look at him. "Hey Paul," I said watching him walk in.

"Hey," he said with a nod, his mouth saying 'hey', but his eyes saying 'you're fucking my boyfriend and I'm going to cut off your dick for it.'

Daniel gave a tight smile. Way to hide that guilt, Daniel.

"News?" I asked, tossing the cube from hand to hand.

"Not much in the way of news. Washington's going to inform our allies. President Raines is preparing a speech to come clean to the world about the Stargate if it comes to that and the Pentagon were throwing around words like _chain of command_ and _protocol_," Paul said tiredly.

"And?"

"George explained exactly how quickly Ba'al could take out whole cities within minutes. We also reminded the Joint Chiefs that not only did Ba'al take out the whole of the SGC, he must have been responsible for the Black Ops teams they sent down when all communication between them and the base was lost."

"They sent teams down?" Daniel asked.

"Twelve hours after they lost contact. The SGC informed the Pentagon that Ba'al had made a threat. No one expected him to get past the iris. They were expecting an air attack."

"Right. And when the Black Ops team got down here, Ba'al's Jaffa probably took care of them and then left."

"How did they dial out if the console wasn't working?" Daniel asked.

"Well, the Asgard are able to dial into a Stargate without a DHD. We know that Ba'al's arsenal of weapons and technology has grown to match the Asgard's in the last twenty years," Paul replied. "Anyway, I think me and George got the message across. In the event of an invasion, the armed forces need to be evacuating people. If it comes down to hand to hand combat, I think we can put up a fight on the ground. Not in the air."

"We need to find out where we stand with our off-world allies," Daniel said.

"That'll take too long without the Stargate," Paul answered.

"The gate's working. Thor fixed it," I said. "But we can pretty much guess where our allies stand. The Asgard have spent all their resources on fighting the replicators and I don't even think the council's going to be swayed by Thor on this one. They know how strong Ba'al is. As for the Tok'ra, no one even knows how many of them are left out there."

Paul sighed. "And Ba'al could show up at any time."

"We need a plan and fast," I said. "Paul, we brought we back some stuff from Area 51. You should take a look. See if any of it is a big, honking Goa'uld killer."

Paul gave a nod. "Will do."

"Okay, I'm gonna head up and look at my mushroom gun," I said turning to leave. I realized the little, rusty cube was still in my hand.

"Oh, hey," I said, holding the cube out to Daniel.

Daniel took it and I suppose, before I would have let it go, there was a brief moment when we were both holding it at the same time. I couldn't let go.

I wouldn't say it was an unpleasant experience, but it wasn't exactly a walk in the park either. It was like sticking your hand in an electric socket and seeing inside a light bulb. It was like the best pain you could ever feel. For a moment it felt like I was standing so close to Daniel I could see all the different blues of his eyes. Millions of little blues.

A light shot out of the side of the cube and splintered into a square of bright lines. Images flashed across the lines. Images of me and Daniel. I'm not sure how many of them were dreams; definitely fantasies. I'm not even talking about slap me, spank me fantasies. Simple ones, like a simple kiss. The images that I didn't recognize must have been Daniel's. I saw myself there. The older me. The younger me. Daniel had a picture of every face I must have ever made.

The light vanished and our hands became unstuck from the box. It fell to the floor and we all stood staring at it. All three of us.

That was one hell of an awkward silence.

## 

*

Half of the base was gathered for the showdown to end all showdowns. I think someone sold tickets. I was sitting on one of the beds in the newly cleared and fixed up infirmary. Behind me were Carter, Teal'c and George. Janet was bandaging my burnt hand and people who had no business being around were loitering, just to watch the drama unfold through the window of the doctor's office.

"I can't watch this," Carter said quietly.

"It is most unbearable," Teal'c added, looking as though he was going to break out the popcorn to help bear it a little better.

Janet pulled the curtain around the bed and blocked off the view.

"Hey!" Carter immediately protested.

"I thought you said you can't watch," Janet said dryly.

"I didn't say I wasn't going to," Carter replied.

"And you?" Janet said to Teal'c.

Teal'c straightened up and smiled a little. "I will find a way to bear it."

Janet shook her head in disapproval. "You two are pathetic."

"Someone want to enlighten me about what's going on with those two?" George complained.

We all turned our heads and looked at him at the same time. It was weird. For a community where gossip was a rampant and contagious disease, we all managed to keep the more sordid details of our lives hidden from George. He may have been a more streamlined and younger version of General Hammond, but sometimes, you just knew he was wishing for the old days of yore. Sometimes, he wasn't George. He was General Hammond. You couldn't just give him the gossip on who was sleeping with who.

It was too weird.

"What?" George asked as we stared at him like idiots.

"It's complicated," I said lamely.

"I don't understand those two. They're like a damn married couple," George groused.

We all stared. Way too long. George stared back, really long.

"What?" he said again.

There was a bright flash behind the closed curtain. Gee, I wonder what that was. Janet pulled back the curtain to reveal Thor in all his naked glory.

"Why is everyone gathered here?" he asked.

I held up my hand. "Accident."

Thor looked at Carter, Teal'c, George and Janet. "You were all involved in this accident?"

Carter opened her mouth to speak and abandoned her excuse. "I'll be in my lab. Come on, Teal'c."

"I was fixing his hand," Janet said. "And now, I'm going to check up on our supplies. Over there."

Thor stared at George. "They won't tell me what's going on."

"I did not expect you to be caught up in their childishness," Thor said calmly.

George sighed. "I'll be in the control room."

Thor stared up at me. "What has happened?"

"Oh nothing," I said calmly. "Except for the fact that me and Daniel got stuck to some ancient Rubiks cube that burned a hole in both of our hands and gave Paul a pay-per-view of what's going on in our heads!" I snapped.

Thor held up his hand. "Calm yourself."

"Calm myself? Ba'al's gonna turn up on our doorstep any minute and we're stuck in the _Days of our Lives_!"

I jumped off the bed and threw the curtain aside. They were still sitting there, staring at each other. I'd never seen Paul so...red. And Daniel wouldn't look him in the eyes.

I sighed. "I can't believe how badly we fucked up," I mumbled. "I gotta be in there. I can't just stand here."

I took a few steps forward. A flash of light later, I walked into a huge window facing Earth. "Thor!" I yelled as I turned around. He wasn't there. I was alone. I was to sit there and think about what I'd done wrong. I'd been sent to my room.

The days of our lives sucked.

## 

*

Ba'al was somewhere out there, picking fabric for his conqueror's outfit. I didn't have time to sulk. So I made do with about five minutes before I headed to the main control room of the ship. Why Thor still had the ship and its crew hanging about was beyond me. I was pretty sure the Asgard council wanted us off their hands now there was an opportunity.

The control room had about seven little grays monitoring systems and the immediate galaxy. So far there had been no sign of Ba'al, but we all knew that with his new cloaking technology he could turn up in five seconds and we wouldn't even know it until he kicked our asses.

At first sight, all grays looks the same, but they're not. They all have little differences that distinguish them from each other. After twenty-years of living with these folks you realize they don't really look like each other at all.

One of the seven manning the deck was Heimdall. Real cranky fella. I mean this guy, he didn't like _anybody_. Especially me. Kicked up a real fuss when Thor borrowed his ship to bring us to Earth.

"Hey, Heimdall," I said walking up to him while he pretended to not notice me.

He looked up at me and sighed. He was frowning even before I called him. "Yes?"

"I need you to beam something aboard. I'm gonna work on it from here," I said.

His frown became a little grumpier, his wide eyes turning into slits. "The Himinbjorg is not for transporting your playthings."

"Check the attitude, pal, I was just asking for a favor," I said as he turned around and walked away.

"And why must you ask favors from those who are antagonized by you the most?"

I turned around to look at Sif. Thor's Twinkie. I think they'd been dating for at least a hundred years. So...not serious then.

"Hey, Sif. Didn't see you there. Where's your boyfriend?" I asked.

Sif's hairless eyebrow went up. "As you know well, the Asgard are without gender assignment."

I smiled. "Bet it makes role play more fun. Hey, Sif, you got a sibling for Heimdall? I'm pretty sure he's so cranky because he's not getting any."

Sif grabbed my finger and started walking, so I followed, trying to match his little alien steps.

Sif. He was a tough one to call. Thor was always 'him'. I mean, he had a hammer. So he had to be a guy. Daniel gave me a whole load of background on Norse mythology and insisted that Sif was a 'she'. But the more we watched Sif, the more it looked as though Sif was the campiest little gray in the galaxy. And for an alien that was always naked, he always had good taste in clothes. I mean, what's that about?

"Thor says something has transpired between you, Daniel and Paul," Sif said as we walked out and into the corridor. He let go of my hand and fell into step next to me.

"Does Thor do anything but gossip?"

"He is concerned for his favorite," Sif said.

"What? I thought I was _your_ favorite?" I said, grinning at Sif and I swear, if the Asgard had enough facial muscles, Sif would have smiled back.

Sif sighed. Actually, Sif was possibly the only Asgard with that dramatic sigh. "It will be quiet when you are all gone."

"Well, at least Heimdall's gonna be pleased."

"He pretends. He is not pleased," Sif said, stopping and looking up at me. "Thor is inconsolable."

I nodded. "I'm not exactly over the moon myself."

Sif nodded. "This...sucks."

I laughed. My eyes began to sting, but I carried on laughing. Sif's eyes were wide and shining and I'm sure he was laughing somewhere on the inside.

"So, let me ask you something," I said. "At what point did you guys think that not wearing clothes was a good idea?"

## 

*

Sif took me to one of the labs and had my metal mushroom beamed aboard. I spent half an hour staring at the thing. I felt like I knew what it was, but I didn't. I felt like I knew what it did, but I didn't. It was odd. Maybe it was a magic metal mushroom.

Thor flashed in and stood on the other side of the table. He was staring at the thing so long, I wondered if he'd passed out on his feet.

"You alright?" I asked.

"Where did you get this?" Thor asked.

"Uh...that's classified apparently," I said. "But it was that place you beamed us into. You know what it is?"

"Indeed," Thor said, touching the magic mushroom. "O'Neill, your genetic contributor-"

"Genetic contributor? That's what we're calling him now?"

"...he was the one that built this. It is how he helped defeat the Replicators. The weapon is able to destroy the ability of the single replicator pieces to adhere to each other and thus replicate," Thor said, ignoring my sensitivities.

"I always thought it was bigger."

"Size is irrelevant."

"Well, of course, _you're_ going to say that."

"I was unaware the Tau'ri were still in possession of this. Why did you bring this?" Thor asked, his fixated on the mushroom.

I shrugged. "I dunno. I saw it and I just had a weird feeling about it."

Thor was frowning. "I do not understand. O'Neill constructed this after you were cloned. You should have no associated feelings with this device."

I held up my hands. "You won't see me argue with that."

"Yet, I feel it is too much of a coincidence that you have chosen the device built by O'Neill."

"You do?"

Thor was silent for a bit. "O'Neill built this device with the aid of the Ancients' technology when he had it downloaded into his brain a second time."

I knew the story. "Right, and you hooked him up to the Daniel Jackson and he built this thing. What's that got to do with me? You made me before he got his second shot of the Ancients' knowledge."

"Yes, that is true. However, years earlier O'Neill encountered an Ancients device for the first time. It is possible that all Ancients repositories contain identical information and some remnant has survived in your brain."

"Whoa. Back up a second. I thought you took that stuff out of my...his head."

"I simply made it dormant. It can never be removed," Thor said.

"What?" I yelled. "You mean that stuff is still in here?"

"Most certainly. And perhaps, not so dormant anymore. It may be a side effect of the cloning process that your brain has somehow normalized the existence of the knowledge. It would be the only way the knowledge would not be a danger to you."

"No way. I would know if it was still in there," I said, feeling a little panicked. "Anyway, I thought there was a marker to stop the Ancients knowledge from being cloned. I mean, that's why I ended up a little shorter than Loki expected, right?"

Thor stared. It was a stare that said perhaps fibbing had occurred at some point. "What?"

"The marker was subterfuge."

I closed my eyes and winced. I could feel the bad news headed in my direction.

"The marker ensured that the knowledge would remain dormant and hidden as well as preventing an exact replica. Anyone trying to replicate O'Neill would come to the conclusion that it was a futile exercise. However, the marker was not made with the intention of being permanent. Up until your conception, human clones have been destroyed. You have outlived the marker. I am almost certain that your recognition of the device is related to the knowledge that built it."

It was a lot of information to take in...and some. It was becoming clear that the Asgard were not holier than thou. In fact, they were the sneakiest little bastards in the universe. Fortunately - for Thor - I had other things to think about.

"Let's say your little theory is right, that the reason I picked this was because of the Ancients' stuff clogging up my brain, now what? I mean, he built this to destroy the Replicators. How does that help us against Ba'al?"

"I do not know," Thor said simply.

I stared at him. "You know, you're not being very helpful today."

"As far as I can see, this weapon is only designed to kill the Replicators. If it is capable of something else, then you must find out what it is."

I gawped. Like someone had just told me I’d been cloned. Again. "Um, excuse me, but if this thing is too advanced for you, how the hell can I figure it out?"

"With twenty years of Asgard upbringing and the knowledge of the Ancients," Thor snapped. "If this weapon can save your world, then you must try and see how."

Before I could tell Thor what I thought of him and the universe at large, I was standing in Carter's lab with the device on her worktop. Ten minutes later, Teal'c and Carter walked in with a can each of Diet Coke.

## 

*

Carter was making us watch the Asgard recording from when the weapon was built. Like, for the fifth time. It still meant squat. I could see what the weapon did and to an extent, even how it was doing it. But no way could we ever build that thing from scratch if we had to. It was a pure invention of the Ancients knowledge. Even the Asgard went cross-eyed when you mentioned the Ancients.

I shook my head. "Thor's got it wrong. I don't think this can be used on anything but the replicators. He's reaching."

Carter switched off the laptop and looked at the mushroom. Teal'c looked bored.

"Perhaps you need to channel that part of your mind that has the Ancients knowledge. I mean, if it drew you to this device, then maybe it's just waiting for you to tap into it," Carter said.

"How?" I asked.

"How did you do it the first time?" Teal'c asked.

"I don't know! If I knew that there wouldn't be a problem. The first time, it just kind of happened," I said with a shrug.

"Well, that is kind of your M.O." Carter grinned.

"What the hell does that mean?" I asked with a frown.

Carter gave Teal'c a sideways glance and held back a smile. He was also amused. I ignored them both and sighed.

"I should probably go find Daniel," I said.

Nothing. They both just watched me quietly.

"Look. You guys weren't there. I didn't know some ancient cube was going to show Paul the Jack and Daniel show just by me passing it to Daniel," I explained.

Nothing but smugness.

"Daniel should have come clean a long time ago," I said as I jabbed my finger at the pair.

Still, stony indifference. "You know what? Like I even care what you guys think."

Teal'c raised an eyebrow and Carter gave him a knowing look.

I sighed and fell forward, my head on the table, hiding under my hands. "You're right," I mumbled. "I messed up."

"They've almost been together for ten years. They're practically married," Carter said.

"Paul Davis is a good man," Teal'c said, looking as though he was the one that screwed Paul over.

"Hey! So am I!" I protested. "Paul and Daniel were on a break, okay? I didn't know Daniel was gonna call it a mistake and go back."

Carter nodded. "So why didn't you break it off when he came back? Again. And again."

"Perhaps you are both morally defunct," Teal'c announced with a smile that made Carter laugh.

I narrowed my eyes at the pair. "You're both really enjoying this aren't you?"

"Of course not. We don't want to see Daniel or Paul get hurt," Carter explained.

"And me?"

"You quite clearly bring these things on yourself, O'Neill," Teal'c said.

I shook my head at Teal'c. "You have changed, my friend. You never used to be like this. You were all eyebrows and 'indeed'. Now you're like Carter."

"Well, to be honest, you're not the same either," Carter said. "I mean, you used to be like a Colonel and now you're...out."

I stared at her for a few seconds. This wasn't something that was up for discussion; it just kind of happened. "I guess that's the advantage of living without regulations," I said.

Carter nodded. "I guess so. You think our genetic contributors would have appreciated it?"

I knew she was asking about them, the other Jack and Daniel, whether they were screwing each other when not screwing at each other. I think she knew the answer, she just wanted someone else to say it. "Everyone wants freedom," I said. "Right Teal'c?"

"Indeed," Teal'c said quietly.

Carter smiled and gave another nod.

It would've ended up being another awkward silence if Siler hadn’t burst in, looking as though he had ran all the way. We were up on our feet before he even started explaining.

"Someone's dialing in," Siler said.

## 

*

We all ran into the control room to see that the gate was activated and the iris was closed. Paul and Daniel stood either side of George as they stared at the gate.

"Do we know who it is?" I asked.

"No," Paul replied. "Not yet."

As we waited for something to happen, half of the window suddenly brought up Thor. "What is happening?" he asked.

"Someone's dialing in," Carter replied.

Thor vanished from the screen and appeared next to us. The window still showed his empty seat. The image flickered and vanished.

"He is coming," Thor said.

"How can you be sure?" George asked.

"The Himinbjorg has detected an anomalous energy pattern. Something is headed on a direct trajectory towards Earth. Something big and powerful. Now that Ba'al has the technology to cloak his ships from our detectors and from sight, we must tread with more caution," Thor warned. "Judging by the velocity and trajectory, there will be something within Earth's orbit in the next two hours."

"So it's something big and powerful. Doesn't have to be a ship," I said.

Everyone in the room turned to look at me.

"Okay. So only I'm supporting that theory," I said lamely.

"What was that?" Paul asked, pointing at the screen monitoring gate activity. We watched the screen and saw exactly what Paul had seen a second ago. Something had traveled through the gate and met the iris. There were two more blips on the screen. Then nothing. Thor was watching another screen quietly. I looked at it and saw the sudden activity.

"There is an incoming transmission," Thor announced.

We all waited. The control room was deathly still and all eyes were fixed on the monitors above our heads. A second later they were fixed on the window. The window darkened completely before it was filled with the transmission.

Twenty years on and he still looked the same. Same sneer on his face and same smug expression mixed in with a little suspicion.

"Identify yourself," he said, his voice never rising, but still demanding.

"We on air?" Carter asked Thor.

"We are only receiving transmissions at present."

"Maybe we should say hello. He obviously knows someone's here now," Daniel said.

Carter sat down in front of the controls, Thor hovering at her side. I watched as she took control of the panel and tried to ignore the fact that I suddenly felt as though I'd eaten about ten buckets of chicken.

"We're on," she said a few seconds later.

The fact that we were on became apparent just from the change on Ba'al's face. He was shocked. Real shocked. He was seeing it and not believing it.

"What trickery is this?" Ba'al asked as his eyes moved left to right and back again. He was taking a long look at all of us.

"The Tau'ri wish no trouble. It would be best for you to leave," Sheriff Thor said.

Ba'al laughed and I swear it echoed all over the SGC. "Kneel before me now and I will spare you."

"You know that's not going to happen," George said. Ba'al frowned at him, a little confused. It was probably the hair.

Then he was looking right at me. The sudden feeling of acid burning through my clothes was completely unexpected and I clenched my jaw against the memory.

"Tell your friends, fighting will only prolong your suffering," Ba'al said. "I am sure you remember."

For a minute the control room vanished and I was lying on the metal grate, my body feeling like it weighed a ton. The acid drops flew towards me slowly and then there was burning. I saw Ba'al, the satisfaction in his eyes. He didn't care about pain or suffering. He did this for kicks. The louder I screamed, the happier it made him.

"We'll see you at high noon," I said, as laid back as I could manage. "Carter? Hang up the phone."

Ba'al disappeared from the screen, smug to the end. Everyone was staring at me.

"O'Neill, you have a plan?" Thor asked.

"Nope. But we can't sit around on our asses and do nothing. Okay, listen up guys. Carter, find out about the beta site and if we still have one. Keep that gate open. I want you and Teal'c to start sending people through when we need to."

"I'll talk to Raines," George said with a nod. "She should know what we're doing."

I nodded back. "Paul, talk to the Pentagon. If they've got anything up their sleeves that we could use, we need to know. Now is not the time to be stashing the good stuff."

Paul gave a resentful nod. "Daniel, look through your office. Journals, files, whatever."

"What am I looking for?" Daniel asked.

I shrugged. "I dunno. Allies with big space guns, wacky alien technology, lost cities, gate addresses. Whatever you can find."

"And you O'Neill?" Thor asked.

I looked at everyone with due seriousness. "I'm going to figure out how to use that mushroom."

## 

*

That was a lie. Figuring out the mushroom was the second thing. The first thing was to slip into the nearest little Tau'ri's room and bring up my lunch. I wasn't sure why it was happening. The Ba'al thing happened so long ago and I never thought about it since I was 'born'. I knew he was out there, but I never thought about it. Suddenly I was back in the SGC and we were trying to save the world again and it was all so real and familiar. He even had the same goatee for crying out loud. I tried to tell myself that Ba'al never happened to me. The guy it happened to was older and...deader. I'd never even met Ba'al.

Talk about lying to yourself. Ba'al was living proof that no matter how many clones you had, they were all the same guy. When you tortured one and the rest of them threw up, there was no difference between clone and genetic contributor. I was Jack O'Neill. I'd always been him. For a while I was lost, but now I was back; hurling my guts out. My world, my SGC and my scars.

The door opened behind me as I heaved again. There were footsteps and they didn't come in too far. It wasn't Daniel, Carter or Teal'c; that much was obvious.

I got up shakily and turned around to see Paul, watching me with that quiet face of his. I washed my mouth out and splashed some water on my face. Wiping my face on the back of my sleeve, I walked towards Paul.

"Go ahead," I said. "Say what you've got to say."

Paul nodded. Then he punched me in the face. I landed hard on the floor, my jaw feeling dislocated.

Paul was breathing hard and looking down at me with tears in his eyes. I deserved it. I totally deserved it.

He left me lying there on the floor, my hand pressed to my throbbing jaw. Ba'al was about to kick our asses and Paul had just punched me out for stealing his boyfriend. It was kind of funny. I started to laugh. I don't think I ever laughed like that before. I couldn't stop laughing. I heard the door open and the sound of slow, heavy footsteps approaching me. A moment later, Teal'c's face was peering down at me with an amused smile on his face.

"You're right," I said. "I do it to myself." Then I started to laugh again.

## 

*

I was in Carter's lab. holding a cold can of Diet Coke to my broken jaw and staring at the stupid mushroom Thor had pinned his hopes on.

George called down to let me know that Raines had insisted on being beamed down to the SGC. She was also insisting on not going through to the beta site unless the mountain was falling around her ears. I sat there wondering for a while what exactly our plan was in the event that Ba'al was successful. Go down with the mountain or escape to fight another day?

Getting this extension on our lives seemed a little futile if we were so prepared to die. Yet, I had to ask myself how easy it would be to run. But then, it's never about winning the battle. It's about winning the war.

"Hey."

I looked up from the mushroom to see Daniel standing in the doorway, arms folded across chest, face slightly fallen.

"You're supposed to be looking for wacky furniture that can help me blow up ships," I said, prodding the mushroom with a pen.

"Teal'c said Paul hit you," Daniel said, looking guilty.

"Well, you know Teal'c. Can't keep a good secret down."

"You okay?" Daniel asked as he approached the table.

I looked up at him. "What do you think?"

Daniel didn't say anything. He just looked annoyed by my irritated bastard routine.

"Good people lost their lives here and if we can't figure out a way to stop Ba'al, it was all for nothing," I said lamely, throwing the pen on the table. "I don't want that son of a bitch to get away with it."

"Get away with what, Jack?" Daniel asked gently.

I looked away from Daniel because he was reading me inside out. I wanted to say it. I wanted to tell Daniel that Ba'al couldn't get away with what he did to me. It was petty and small and it wasn't supposed to be about me, but every time I saw him, the blood in my veins turned to ice. I was back on that grate and under a rain of acid. Every single drop that hit my skin over twenty years ago was burning me now. Every single drop left a scar. You couldn't see it, but it was there and it was deep enough to cut through a million clones.

I remember waking up a little stronger and a little closer to breaking every time. Strong enough to take it and too broken to carry on. I survived only because there's an inbuilt machine for hope. Every drop of acid came with the hope that it would all end. The hope that I'd get out. That Daniel was really there and I wasn't just going crazy. Just like the hope that one day I'd wake up in my bed and all this clone stuff was just a stupid dream because of too much Chinese food. Like the hope that me and Daniel could wake up together and not have to worry about it being right or wrong.

Like the hope that maybe in some parallel dimension, my boy picked up a gun without bullets.

"When I was in Ba'al's prison, you know how I know you were really there?" I asked Daniel.

Daniel shook his head, a sad look on his face because he knew he would never remember. Twenty years after being cloned, he had no memories of ascension and it looked as though it would stay that way.

"I knew you were real because I never had that much value for my own soul," I said.

Daniel smiled. "I wish I could remember."

"I remember," I said and he smiled at me because it was okay that one of us knew.

"Did he hit you hard?" Daniel asked.

"It was like being hit by a frozen ham," I said.

Daniel laughed. "I'm sorry."

"You should be. It's your fault," I said. "And anyway, how come you didn't get a smack in the mouth?"

Daniel looked wounded. "You got off easy. He made me cry. That's much worse."

"Oh please, you're always crying over stuff," I said to Daniel's unamused eyebrows.

"You would have cried too. You should have seen his face when I told him. It was like someone had stuck a knife in his gut," Daniel said quietly. "We're bastards. Really, really big ones."

"Don't worry about him. He'll be fine. There's a lot of people that want to comfort him," I said.

Daniel shook his head. "He deserves better. I really hurt him."

I rolled my eyes at Daniel. "If it makes you feel any better, it was always my plan to drive a wedge between you two and then steal you from Paul," I said seriously.

Daniel stared back humorlessly. "Don't be an ass."

"I can't help it. It's genetic."

"I'm beginning to notice," Daniel said with a smile. "So, how goes it with the mushroom of the Ancients?"

"The only way I can see this thing causing an damage is if we throw it at Ba'al when he's not looking," I said.

Daniel smiled indulgently.

"I'm being serious," I complained. "I've got nothing. I don't think it does anything besides kill bugs."

"Then why did you pick it?"

I shrugged. "It looked shiny?"

Daniel sighed and leaned on the table, propping himself up on his elbows and resting his chin on the palm of his right hand. His eyes were on the mushroom, which is good because I was staring at him like a lovesick teenager.

"Well, try and think what other reasons there might be, what urges. Something. Anything."

"Urges? I got a lot of those," I said.

Daniel gave me a narrow eyed look, his mouth quirking in a little smile. "I bet you do."

"Oh yeah. Wanna find out what they are?"

Daniel grinned. "Maybe later. Right now, there's a little matter of saving the world."

"Piece of cake," I said. "I'll just power up my mushroom and blast..."

That's where it hit me. Suddenly I remembered seeing the mushroom and the way it could blast those replicators apart. I saw sudden and brief flash of Ancients knowledge that made a thing like this possible. It was the weirdest thing; while I remembered, I understood and when it was gone, I remembered only what I could hold on to. Which was okay, because I knew enough to save the day. At least I hoped I did.

## 

*

Dragging Daniel along, I went to the briefing room and assembled the troops; Carter, Teal'c, George, Paul and Thor.

"You want the Himinbjorg?" Thor asked, his invisible eyebrows hitting the roof.

"Thor, trust me on this. Look, the mushroom collapses the energy fields that allow the replicator pieces to attract each other; however, you can amplify the effect for different energy fields. We could turn Ba'al's ship, or ships, into floating boxes of useless technology that doesn't work. I just need a big enough power source to do it," I explained.

"The Himinbjorg," Thor said sounding a little disappointed.

"Thor. This thing was made by an Asgard ship interfaced with...well, me. I want to interface with the Himinbjorg and assimilate the device into the ship."

Thor frowned. "Why?"

"I want to turn the Himinbjorg into a weapon."

Thor stared at me and then jerkily turned his head to look at everyone else.

"Interface?"

"Assimilate?"

"Himinbjorg?"

I frowned at Teal'c, Carter and Daniel. If their faces were anything to go by, you'd think they'd never heard me say words of more than a syllable before.

"I want to turn the Heimdall boat into a big honking space gun," I said.

Carter's eyes widened. "Wow. Cool."

Daniel looked startled. "You can do that?"

I thought about it. "Apparently."

"Exactly what do you intend to do with this weapon?" Paul asked. As soon as he spoke, Daniel's eyes lowered and I just wanted to jump out of the window, into the gate room and into an incoming wormhole.

Thor answered the question. "If aimed at Ba'al's ship and powerful enough, I believe it will render all energy sources within useless."

I looked at Thor. "You think it'll work?"

Thor seemed to sigh. "It could work. But there is a problem. I am assuming that your intention is to channel the power of the Himinbjorg into one point of expulsion. From there it will be directed at the target. In normal circumstances, if the ship's energy was to converge towards one focal point-"

"It would overload the ship's core," Carter said quietly.

Everyone looked at her and then me. Carter was just staring at me. "Wouldn't it?"

"I thought about that," I said. "In the event of a power surge, the first place to go will be the firing point. So I'll be controlling things from the back of the ship. I'll stay interfaced with the ship until I know the plan's worked...or not. Then I'll beam on out of there."

Again, there was a whole lot of staring and not a lot of cheering.

"What if there's not enough time? If the power surge is big enough, and believe me, with a ship that size it will be, an explosion's going to rip it open like tin foil in seconds," Carter said.

"Well, that's a risk," I said.

"And what if you transport off the ship without breaking the link with it?" Daniel asked.

"Some people might not notice the difference," I quipped.

"This isn't a joke," Daniel said icily.

"I know," I said, trying a gentler approach. "But it's all I've got. If anyone's got a better idea, then by all means. Tell me. Really. Now would be a good time."

Yep. That shut them up.

"Then we must assist you," Teal'c said.

I nodded. "Yeah. From down here, Teal'c. In the event that this doesn't work and blows up a perfectly good ship, nobody gets to be on it, except for me."

"We can't let you do that," George said. "It's suicide."

"Not if it works."

"And if it doesn't?" Daniel asked quietly.

"Then...I guess it's goodnight my someone, goodnight."

Bad choice of words. Carter, Teal'c and Daniel looked like they were ready to wail over my corpse right there, right then.

"What are we supposed to do while you're risking your ass?" George asked.

"If it works, you guys pick up the pieces and if it doesn't, you go through that gate and fight another day," I said.

"Sir-" Carter objected and then realized what she had just said. Then she just stared, afraid. I stared back, unable to think of anything else to add.

"Thor? You with me on this, buddy?"

Thor gave a small nod. "I will speak to Heimdall."

"Well, we don't have a lot of time."

## 

*

Daniel followed me straight out and into the corridor. He shoved me into a nearby utility room and slammed the door shut.

I was waiting for objections. Maybe a little anger. But then I always forgot what Daniel was. He was the kind of guy that would risk his life in the blink of an eye to save someone. In my place, he would do the same. If anyone here would have made objections to someone risking their life, it was probably me. Daniel, clone or no clone, always knew the score.

He stepped towards me and I closed the gap by grabbing him by his jacket and pulling him into a kiss. It was all so needy. I don't know where the kisses started and gasping ended. Hands down pants and lips on skin is the best kind of sex. All about the moment. We hung on each other, leaning against a wall and closed our eyes when it felt like the world was about to explode.

When we walked out, I wanted to walk out with Daniel's hand in mine, but the SGC walls told me not to. So we walked along with flushed faces, too scared to look at each other.

I smiled when Daniel's finger stroked the underside of mine, as if accidentally bumping into it. Just like they used to do it.

## 

*

Heimdall was pretty mad that the only way I had figured on saving the Earth was by _destroying his world_. I said thank you.

I was beamed straight up to the furthest point from the blast site of the ship. It was a small room with metal cabinets. There was nothing in here that I needed. It was just a space to hide out. Even the mushroom was in a lab somewhere a few floors above me.

"So what is this place? I've never seen this room before," I said.

"It is a storage quarter for cleaning utilities," Thor's disembodied voice replied.

"You're kidding me. You're making me hide out in the janitor's closet?"

"It's the safest place on the ship," Carter said.

"I'm trying to save the world. Not clean it," I said dryly.

"Jack," that was Daniel's impatient voice. "Shouldn't you be interfacing and assimilating at this point?"

I sighed. "Okay, I'm going to close down this frequency. You think I can get K.I.L.O. on this thing?"

There was silence. "Anyone want to wish me good luck?"

Suddenly they were all back and wishing me good luck at the same time. I cut them off at that point.

This is how it was going to work. There was a deep freeze pod in the room. I was going to take a little nap in it and then interface with the ship. The Ancient's knowledge was somewhere in my subconscious and the only way the Himinbjorg could cross-reference it to assimilate the mushroom was if I was not awake. In the event that everything went wrong, the pod would also make a nice casket.

I got inside and closed my eyes as it clicked shut. A moment later I could hear the hiss of the knockout gas.

Being connected to a spaceship is...weird. When I became aware of my surroundings, it was like being everywhere at the same time. I was in every part of the ship all at once. Really, weird. Weirder still was being in so many places at once and being able to see myself lying there in the pod. I decided if all went well, I'd get a haircut once this was all over.

There wasn't much time. If Ba'al arrived right there and then, there was no time at all. I didn't know how long it would take for the ship to use my head to pull apart the mushroom and turn the Himinbjorg into one huge version of it. Luckily, being a part of the ship, I could see it as it was happening. I could see the power being diverted bit by bit and being channeled towards the front of the ship. In the lab, a huge nozzle was taking shape, much like the mushroom had years ago. If all went to plan, that was the barrel of my gun.

The ship's sensors indicated that Thor's anomaly was virtually on our doorstep. At the most, it was forty-five minutes away. What he had failed to mention was, this anomaly was roughly the size of three mother ships. He was coming armed to the gills.

I told myself I wasn't going to be afraid, but it was hard not feeling acid burns and a sudden sensation of falling. I really hated that snake.

The ship was beginning to groan in places and I could virtually feel energy fluctuations all over the place. It was like a rush of blood to the head.

Twenty years ago, I didn't think I'd be back here, saving the planet from the Goa'uld. Twenty years ago I felt as though one day I'd just stop existing.

Twenty years ago, I woke up in the body of a boy and then I was told that I was a copy. I wasn't the only one and for a moment that made things okay. At least I wasn't alone. And as the years passed and I began to see the young faces turn into the faces of men and women I knew, I suddenly realized how unneeded we all were. Extras. Spares. It was like Carter's entropic cascade failure. We all couldn't exist together. Even thinking about the originals seemed to take something away from who we were.

Though, here we all were, where it all started. The place that would always say we were the copies.

Suddenly it had stopped mattering, who or what we were. They were all down there in the SGC, clearing it up and making it better like it belonged to them. They were all calling Earth home. I was about to risk my ass for this planet and it hadn't taken such a push. All it took was a memory of caring about this place and the people in it.

A broken pair of glasses meant a lot more than I had wanted it to.

Ba'al had gotten away with what he did to me. It was what he did to everyone else that really pissed me off.

A bright flash not far from the Himinbjorg said Ba'al was here. Three Goa'uld mother ships that the sensors said were armed to the teeth. I needed a few more minutes, just for the whole assimilation process to keep. If he fired straight away, it was no use. We were screwed.

He was scanning the Himinbjorg, I could almost feel the particles of the scan bouncing off me. At the same time, his ships were moving into some kind of formation. Oddly though, there were no weapons powering up. Not yet.

The reason became clear when the Himinbjorg was sent a transmission from one of the ships. As soon as the ship accepted the transmission, Ba'al's hologram appeared on the empty bridge. Looked like he wanted a little chat.

I sent an audio/visual transmission to his ship. The ship in the middle of the three accepted it. I had my first target in sight.

As soon as they accepted, I appeared as a hologram on the bridge of Ba'al's ship and the Himinbjorg.

High noon.

Ba'al smiled immediately. He took a few steps to my left, to get a good look and then he looked back at me with that amused expression. I didn't matter, as long as I could keep him talking for a few minutes, he could say whatever the hell he wanted to.

"How is it that you live?" he asked quietly.

I stared at him, straight into his eyes, but it was easy not being afraid when both of us really weren't there.

"What is the purpose of this ship? There is only one human aboard. Why?"

I still didn't say anything. I didn't have to answer his questions. Not today.

"_He_...is dead," Ba'al said with a satisfied smile. "You are a trick of the Asgard."

"Why?" I said, startling him a little. "Afraid of ghosts?"

His eyes latched onto mine and he laughed a low, ugly laugh. "I fear nothing. But you, you still fear me."

I smiled and I'm not sure how real it was. Not real enough for me deny what he had just said.

"Tell me, what do the Asgard mean by leaving an empty, weaponless ship in the orbit of your planet with only one man onboard?"

I shrugged. "Just protecting my planet."

He laughed again. "Humor? You will not hide behind it long. I will not destroy this ship. I will make you my prisoner and then you will answer all my questions. Then you can amuse me as much as you wish. I will break you quicker this time."

My impulse was to punch the son of a bitch. Obviously, I couldn't. I shook my head. "No way," I said. "Not last time, not next time, not ever."

"Your screams will be louder than your friend's."

He stepped back and watched my confusion. He knew he had my attention now. "What friend?"

"The one you call Daniel Jackson," he said slowly.

I was about to call him a liar because I'd only spoken to Daniel less than an hour ago. But he wasn't talking about this Daniel. He was talking about the other one. The one whose body wasn't found in the SGC.

"He was tiresome and I bored of him easily. I ended his misery," he almost whispered. "But you, I will not bore of you so quick."

For a moment all I could think of was Daniel, laid out on that grate and being showered with acid and knives. I wondered if he called out for anyone; if he remembered me calling out his name.

The ship's lights shut down suddenly, as if someone had turned them off simultaneously all over the ship. I could feel all the power headed to the nozzle at the front of the ship, rushing through conduits as if it was running through my veins. The ship groaned as metal expanded where it wasn't supposed to. The assimilation was complete.

Ba'al frowned at me.

I held up my hand and waved at him. "Go to hell."

Still connected to the ship, I could feel the power surge slam into me. I had laid out a sequence to take out all three ships. I just hoped the Himinbjorg would hold together long enough for me to beam the pod to Earth or into space. Most importantly, for me to disconnect from the Himinbjorg.

The ship was shaking under the pressure and I was losing sensors everywhere. The only thing I could see was Ba'al's hologram on the bridge, looking shocked. He turned to look at me and he was furious. I'd never seen him so angry and it made me feel good.

"This is not over," he said before his hologram disappeared. I sent out my last command. The ship filled with light. Everything went quiet.

## 

*

I woke up with a gasp, my heart pounding in my ears. I was in my bed, dreaming about being a clone and living on a planet with other clones. No, not dreaming. Having a nightmare.

I got up slowly and sat there on the edge of the bed, still shaken up and breathing hard. I would've gone back to sleep if I hadn't heard running water. I got up and followed the sound to the bathroom where the shower curtain was drawn. I watched the unmoving shadow behind it; I'm pretty sure someone was watching me right back. Stepping forward, I snatched the curtain back.

Ba'al stared straight into me and I couldn't move against the hard grate. A dagger left his hand and slowly moved towards me.

"Daniel," I barely mumbled.

Ba'al laughed and the room filled with bright light. Before I was completely blinded by it, I saw Ba'al turn to dust, like he'd always been made of sand.

"Dad?"

I opened my eyes and squinted against the bright sun. It was a nice day with a cloudless, blue sky. The kind of day where nothing can go wrong.

I turned around to look at Charlie, smiling up at me and holding the new baseball mitt I never gave him.

"Can we play catch?" he asked.

I nodded slowly. "Sure we can."

Charlie grinned and it was brighter than the sun. I remembered Sara telling me he had my grin and how stupidly proud I felt.

Charlie turned around to go.

"Charlie?" I said quickly, knowing the dream always ended before he could turn back.

But this time he did turn back.

"Come here," I said and knelt on the ground.

He grinned again, because he knew Dad was always full of crazy stuff. "What?"

I held out an arm and he came in close. I held my hand to his face, just staring as he looked back a little confused. I pulled him into a hug when my eyes began to burn and his face became blurred.

I heard him laugh and held him tighter than I'd ever held him before. Tighter than I ever could.

I couldn't save him. No matter what part I played in saving the world and no matter how many times I did it, I could never change the fact that Charlie was dead. I couldn't save my son.

No matter what I ever did, I'd never be able to save him.

## 

*

My eyes snapped open and I was staring up at the concrete ceiling of the infirmary. My head and heart were pounding and my body felt like it had been thrown from a hundred-story building.

"Hello."

That was Daniel. I didn't reply or look at him; I didn't trust myself right now.

"Bad dream?" Daniel asked softly.

"Something like that," I managed to mumble.

"How do you feel?" was the next quiet question.

I dunno. How did I feel? I couldn't say. It felt like a tough question.

"Ask me later," I said as I closed my eyes.

I was trying to be far away from everything. Pretending to be in an alternative universe. I was trying not to think about what Ba'al had said.

_He was tiresome and I bored of him easily. I ended his misery_.

"Did I get him?" I asked.

"No," Daniel said. "He transported on to one of the other ships and got away."

I squeezed my eyes shut tighter. If I was lucky, this was a dream too.

"Did the weapon work at all?"

"Yes. It worked, but not like you intended it to," Daniel's voice was calm. "You built a weapon that left the ships undamaged. It didn't harm a single piece of technology on them, but it destroyed every living, breathing thing in its path. You've left two mother ships orbiting Earth with nothing but piles of dust. The only ship that got destroyed was the Himinbjorg. Actually, it put on quite a light show. You probably made CNN."

"I didn't know that was going to happen," I said, thinking about the dusty corridors of those mother ships.

"No, neither did I."

"How could you have known?" I said feeling annoyed as I finally looked at him...with his cream sweater and pants, looking warmer than everything around him. I stared.

"What's going on?" I asked, staring at him as he smiled.

"The others, they weren't too keen on my helping...save the world. You know about them and crossing lines," Daniel said with a shrug. I just kept looking at him, more horrified than anything else. I closed and opened my eyes. There he was looking familiarly ascended.

"What's going on?" I asked again, in case I'd imagined asking the first time.

"Remember that line we're not supposed to cross? I might have stuck my foot over it a little," Daniel said.

"I don't understand. You were fine when I left you," I said, panic setting in.

He looked amused. "He's still fine, Jack."

It was back to staring at Daniel, like I'd never seen him ascended before. It was official, I'd finally gone nuts.

"Ba'al said he-"

"He did," Daniel cut me off, his eyes on mine. "He wasn't lying about that."

"Your soul's gotta be pretty special if Oma keeps trying to save it," I said, still not believing this. "It was you, wasn't it? Me finding that device. Suddenly remembering to use it. That was you all along...not crossing the line."

"I just gave you a fighting chance. That's all you've ever needed," Daniel said with a nod, his eyes shining.

I wanted to say something profound, tell him I missed him, needed him. Something. "You look good for your age."

His smile widened. "Well, I'm kind of cheating."

"We saying goodbye again?"

"You've got your friends to go back to. I've got mine," Daniel said with a small smile.

I frowned at him and opened my mouth to ask him what friends he was talking about.

"I just wanted to tell you one thing," he said before I could ask him anything. "You were right. Ba'al never broke you the first time and he never will. Just remember that. That's who you are, Jack."

I opened my mouth again as he looked over his shoulder, like someone was calling him. "I have to go now. Goodbye, Jack."

I wanted to sit up and grab him, ask him questions. There was a bright flash as I felt something slam through my chest and my back hitting hard metal. There was noise all around me.

"Wait! I've got a pulse. Get him onto that stretcher," Janet was shouting. I looked through half-closed eyes and saw concerned faces watching me. The one I was looking for was gone.

## 

*

My eyes snapped open and I was staring up at the concrete ceiling of the infirmary. My head and heart were pounding and my body felt like it had been thrown from a hundred-story building.

Huh. Déjà vu.

"Hello."

That was Daniel. I turned my head and looked at him standing by my bed, concerned look on face, arms folded across chest. If it weren't for the black jumpsuit, I could have been a little confused.

"How do you feel?" he asked softly when I just kept staring at him.

I thought about it. How did I feel? Bruised. Battered. Thirsty. Familiar. I felt like a Jack O'Neill.

I smiled at Daniel. He frowned and then smiled back in confusion, asking, "What?"

It wasn't long before Carter and Teal'c showed up, followed by George and Thor. There were questions and answers, none from me. I was lying there and wondering if the ascended Daniel had been a dream. It wouldn't be the first time.

Even when they repeated what Daniel had told me about the weapon and Ba'al, I nodded mutely and carried on wondering. Precognitive phenomena in a near death situation, I told myself. I know, what a crock. Janet eventually ushered everyone out when I began to snore during the conversations taking place over me.

I lay there for a while, drifting back to sleep and trying not to remember the spike of voltage that had woke me up earlier in the gate room. I tell ya, something like that can really sting.

"You know, I have to ask," Daniel said.

I opened my eyes to see Daniel sitting down on the edge of my bed and leaning over me. "I was talking to Sam earlier and something just didn't make sense. How the hell did you manage to appear on the gate room ramp, fifty-six seconds after the Himinbjorg blew up?"

He was so close and his hair was so messy. I wanted to be back in my bed at the beach house, Daniel all over me like a cheap suit. I looked at him and shrugged.

"I'd already transported off before the ship actually blew?" I said, even though it made no sense.

Daniel nodded, his eyes narrowing as he looked away for a moment. Then he looked back at me and smiled. "That doesn't make sense. The Himinbjorg's transporter buffers are designed to recall particle sequences for months, but only if the ship is intact. If there's no ship, there's no buffer to tell the transporter system how and where to reintegrate matter. No ship, no buffer...no rematerializing. Jack, twenty seconds after the initial energy surge, there was no Himinbjorg. The SGC lost your signal at the same time. Fifty-six seconds later you appeared on the ramp in front of the gate. By all accounts, you should be dead."

Daniel looked right through me when he said that, like he was amazed I was there. Like he knew I was holding back.

"Guess I'm just lucky," I said quietly, offering a smile.

Daniel nodded and got up to leave. "Guess so."

He didn't need to know about my dream, vision...continuing experiences with the ascended. Daniel was happy being Daniel. I didn't want that to change. I needed him to carry on being who he was. He made it easier for me to be who I was.

A guy called Jack O'Neill apparently.

Anyway, the world was saved and predictably the Pentagon was trying to get into the Asgard's pants.

Bad example.

Raines was adamant that the SGC was going to be run with our input because we were the experts. The Pentagon was predictably trying to wheedle out more technology from the Asgard after they'd seen the SGC's new dialing system and generators. I'm pretty sure Raines wanted an Asgard transport system for the Oval office.

Thor was plain in what he was willing to offer.

Nothing.

"You already have improved technology at the SGC as well as my people working by your side. That is enough for now," Thor had said in his snippy voice.

Some Pentagon body pointed out that we weren't really Thor's people. I've never seen Thor glare before. That was something special.

"I think you'll find they are," Thor said, making everyone's balls shrink into their bodies.

As much as we were being welcomed back into the world, the whole of the SGC knew that there were people waiting to take advantage of the things we knew. I'm pretty sure some people were just dying to get us under the microscope for a look at the lovely world of cloning.

Besides, I wasn't ready to go out there yet. Inside the SGC it was still like being away from Earth. One day I'd go further than the mountain, but not yet.

My immediate concern was Thor and the others waiting for a ship to pick them up and take them home. I just couldn't believe they would leave us behind so easily. So quick. I was not looking forward to the day they would just up and leave.

## 

*

"Jack. Jack?" Daniel was whispering.

I opened my eyes slowly and saw his face peering down at me.

"Hey," he smiled. "You're up."

"Of course I'm up," I mumbled. "You woke me."

It was about three in the morning and I'd just managed to fall asleep, not an easy thing to do when you've become accustomed to fresh air and windows. We were all holed up in quarters in the SGC, since there was no clearance or real desire to leave the base yet. I got to have a V.I.P room thanks to the fact that I almost blew myself up while saving the planet and was suffering from some residual effects of savetheworlditis.

"Well, since you're up-" Daniel started.

"No. Whatever it is, forget about it. I'm not interested. Unless it's sex, in which case you can get started and I'll catch up when I'm awake."

"Thor wants you in the gate room," Daniel said.

I frowned at Daniel. "Why are you up at three in the morning?"

"I was working on something with Sam," Daniel said, like it was perfectly normal.

"It's like a disease with you people," I said, turning my back on Daniel and getting comfortable.

"Jack. Jack? Are you sleeping?"

I rolled my eyes. "No, just trying."

"Jack, an Asgard ship's just arrived."

Okay. I was awake. "So?"

"Thor said he wants to tell you something."

"Tell him to send me a postcard," I said flatly.

There was a bright flash of light and I was lying on the briefing room table without bedclothes, in birthday suit, Daniel standing by the side, Thor next to him.

I sat up and stared at Thor. "Do you mind?"

A few moments later a black T-shirt and pair of blue BDU pants flashed into my lap. I scowled at Thor and made quick work of putting them on.

"Guy has a ship and thinks he can do anything he wants," I muttered, jumping off the table.

"You are beginning to make me wonder if the cloning process amplifies attributes of childishness, O'Neill," Thor said.

"I find it gives me a lovable quality," I said blankly. "Look, you're leaving, we have to stay. I get the point. But you want tearful goodbyes? Daniel's your guy."

"Hey!" Daniel objected.

"Come, I wish you to see something," Thor said.

I folded my arms and stood my ground. A flash of light later, the three of us were standing on the ramp, an inch away from the active gate. I turned to look at Thor. He raised a hairless, smug, eyebrow. I just narrowed my eyes at Thor.

He held out an IDC device to Daniel and then looked at the gate. "Go through. There is something I wish you to see. A gift to you all."

Daniel and I were both staring at Thor. He then vanished without another word. Daniel looked at me and smiled, tilting his head towards the gate.

We stepped through onto sandy ground. The gate was on a familiar sandy ridge. I walked on ahead of Daniel until I reached the slope that showed the beach below and the sea ahead. And there, in the distance was my house.

Daniel was standing behind me, smiling and looking around. "They gave us a gate?"

I stood there with a grin, staring at the waves and the sun setting behind my place. I didn't realize how much I missed it until I saw it again. Like Earth; I hadn't realized how much I'd missed it until I'd almost blown up over it.

For a small moment, it didn't seem to matter who was real. Maybe there are things that will always make us who we are, no matter how many of us there are. Things we're afraid of, people we care about. I looked at Daniel staring at the waves, lost in his own thoughts.

"Come on," I said.

"Where are we going?" Daniel asked, falling in next to me.

I nodded towards to the house. "Home. Bed. Sleep. You know what sleep is?"

Daniel rolled his eyes.

”It’s that thing you’re supposed to do at the end of the day. Y’know, right after sex. Some people do it in the middle of sex, but, enough about Teal’c.”

Daniel laughed and stepped in front of me. He grabbed me by my T-shirt and kissed me. “Shut up,” he said quietly, with a smile. I smiled back as he let go.

We carried on walking towards the house. When Daniel's finger stroked the underside of my hand, as if accidentally bumping into it, I held on.

**\- the end -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to [Tafkar](http://tafkar.net/), [The Wild Mole](http://wordsmiths.net/Munchkin/rrr3.html), [Meg](http://offcentre.net/sage/) and [Nel](http://www.pertifity.com/) for your beta skills and generous feedback. A big thanks to **Neige** too for the lovely fic cover. Thanks all :)


End file.
